


Don't Date Mickey Milkovich

by Mrs_Monaghan



Series: Pleasing My Readers (prompts) [49]
Category: Shameless (US), gallavich - Fandom
Genre: Abusive Relationship, Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Boy Mickey Milkovich, Bottom Ian, Breaking Up & Making Up, Cheating, Clueless Mickey, Cocky Mickey, Emotional Manipulation, Fighting, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Gallavich Love, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Ian is still in school, Insecurity, Jealousy, Kissing, Lovers to Friends, M/M, Miscommunication, Mutual Pining, Older Mickey, Pining, Protective Mickey, Shy Ian, Slow Burn, Top Mickey Milkovich, Violence, commitment issues, innocent ian, unprotected sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-10
Updated: 2017-08-15
Packaged: 2018-10-30 08:15:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 37
Words: 53,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10872780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mrs_Monaghan/pseuds/Mrs_Monaghan
Summary: Prompt:"You don' want to date me Ian.""Why not?""Because... you just can't.""But I really like you though.""Stop."(Changed summary)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Caltyn said: Can you do a long fic where Mick takes care of Ian all the time and Mick is the top. Ian is smaller than Mickey and is constantly needing reassurance, protection, understanding and love.
> 
> Missannamurphy said: You're an amazing writer I love it!!! Any chance I could grab a long fic of Ian smaller than Mickey... Ian needs lots of patience and love and mush. Mick is bigger and protective... and super loving on Ian... also Mickey is the top.
> 
> These two prompts are strangely similar. *squints suspiciously* he he hee!! So of course I'm combining them. I'm getting a _DAMAGED_ vibe here. Anyhu, 
> 
>  
> 
> **Enjoy!!!!!**
> 
>  
> 
> Edit: Translated into **Russian** by Margaret here; https://ficbook.net/readfic/7098974/18092892

Ian gets to Mickey and Mandy's apartment then unlocks the door with his key. He looks around the empty living room before calling out,

"Mandy!" 

"In here!"

She replies and Ian walks towards her bedroom with a smile. He finds clothes scattered all over the floor making the room a mess. "What the hell happened here?" He asks gesturing around the mess.

He toes off his shoes and walks on the clothes to get to the bed. Mandy pushes his back so he falls stomach first on the bed.

"Hey assface, clean clothes!" 

Ian laughs. "My feet are clean! Jesus." He throws a sweater at her and they both giggle loudly. 

"I'm reorganizing my closet." She explains inspecting one of her leather mini skirts. "Didn't like how it looked before." 

Ian nods before looking at the nails of his left hand. He clears his throat. "So umm..." 

"No Ian!" She cuts him off. 

"What?" He asks innocently. "You don't even know what I was gonna say." 

She scoffs. "Please. I know exactly what you were going to ask. It's what you always do whenever you come over and he's not around." 

"I do not." 

"If I didn't know better I would think he's the only reason you visit." Ian pouts. "Don't you dare!" 

He gets off the bed, steps on the clothes again to get to her. "Then it's a good thing you know better, right?" Wrapping his hands around her waist, he nudges her with his hip. "Right?" She narrows her eyes at him and he pouts playfully, this time his bottom lip pushed out. "You're my best friend and I love you. Come on, smile." Mandy finally cracks and smirks at him. "You also happen to have one really hot fucking brother." 

She clicks her tongue before pushing him away. "Fuck off." Ian drops back on the bed and grins at her. "You're a fucking puppy, you know that? And no, he's not around, I don't know where he is, and I have no fucking clue when he's coming back." 

Ian just continues smiling which makes Mandy drop the current outfit on her hands. "Ian," she starts, hands on her hips. "I know I've said this before but since you never hear me, I will keep repeating it. You need to get over this crush you have on my brother." 

"It's not a crush. I really like him Mandy." He more than likes Mickey but he's not going to tell her that. Even though he suspects she already knows. 

"Even worse!" She goes back to putting clothes in her closet. "I keep telling you Ian, Mickey is a player. He doesn't do relationships, he doesn't fall in love. He will just end up breaking your heart." She looks at him earnestly and it makes him sad. "Please Ian, _get over him_." He looks down at the hands on his lap trying not to cry. He sniffs and shakes his head. 

He has been in love with Mickey forever. From the moment Ian laid eyes on the Milkovich he fell in love. When he sees Mickey his heart literally skips a beat. When Mickey talks to him he can barely string a sentence together. Anytime the brunette sits next to him Ian's palms can't stop sweating. Mickey makes him nervous, speechless and most of the times breathing is a problem. But Ian wouldn't change a thing about it. He's in love with Mickey Milkovich and Mandy discouraging him like this breaks his heart. Literally. 

He feels the bed dip before soft hands hold him. "I'm sorry baby." She kisses the side of his head. "I didn't mean to hurt you I just... Come on," she stands up and takes his hand. They walk over the clothes and head out to the living room. "Have a seat. I'll make us a snack."

She smiles at him and he smiles back weakly. He can't accept it. _Won't_ accept it. A day is coming when Mickey will love him back. Ian just knows it. Just as he's starting to feel better the door bangs open and God himself walks in. 

"Yo Mandy, got any food? I'm fucking hungry." He asks before thumbing his bottom lip in that sexy way Ian likes. He then turns to look at him and Ian takes in a sharp breath. "Sup Gallagher." 

"Hi... hey Mick.".  

"You good?" Mickey asks with a smile, as he takes off his leather jacket. God, he looks good.

Just as Ian is trying to remember how to speak Mandy walks in. "First of all, I'm not your fucking mother, go make the food yourself. Second, who the fuck is this?" 

Ian had been so mesmerized by Mickey he missed the guy he came with. Ian's heart drops and he quickly looks away. He reaches for his phone to distract himself. 

"You're my fucking sister. It's your fucking job." Mickey says and Ian can imagine his eyebrows are high up like they usually are. "And this is John." 

"Justin." The guy corrects. 

"Yeah, okay." Mickey says before gesturing towards his bedroom door. "Will meet you in there in a few." Ian looks up to find Mickey on his phone even though he's talking to Justin. "Yo, if you don' wanna fuck you can just fuck off." Mickey snaps finally looking at his not-date. 

"Oh! Umm, yeah." Justin says quickly before rushing towards Mickey's room and closing the door behind him. 

 Mandy shakes her head then whispers, "You're about to fuck the guy. The least you can do is be nice." 

Mickey smirks and flicks her nose. "I don' tell you how to treat your boyfriends." He says before walking towards his room.

"Boyfriend!" Mandy shouts. "Singular." 

Mickey doesn't look back when he flips her off. Things Ian has imagined that finger doing to him. He smiles which turns into a deep frown when he remembers there's another guy in there. He rubs his eyes with his thumb and fore finger. 

"Shit Ian." Mandy says sympathetically which only makes him feel worse. "Mickey is never gonna love you. How long will you torture yourself Ian?" 

Ian shakes his head and gets up. He runs into Mandy's room to pick up his shoes. Without putting them on he heads for the door. 

"Ian..." Mandy tries. 

He looks at her and they stare at each other for a while. Ian then opens the door and looks back at her. 

"I'll wait." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for starting this short journey with me. ♥♥♥♥♥♡♡♡♡❤❤


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> was to update this yesterday but Sense 8 season 2 was on fiiiiireeee! i got carried away but here we go!

Ian walks out of school his bag on his back, with a forlorn look on his face. He smiles bitterly at the fact that his mind is basically Mickey, Mickey, Mickey, 24/7. His heart aches because Mickey may be within arm’s reach but not really. He sees the man every day and talks to him on the daily –or rather Mickey talks to him- but the fact remains Ian will never really have him. The sexy man is so out of his league sometimes Ian can't help but feel pathetic for falling so hard in the first place.

He walks slowly, kicking pebbles, not in any rush to get home. He changes course last minute and heads to Mickey and Mandy’s instead. No surprise there seeing as he spends more time there than he does at his own home anyway. Present or not his family never seems to notice so at the end of the day it never really matters.

Ian looks behind him when he hears to guys arguing behind him. “I forgave you the first time, that don mean you gotta keep repeating the same fucking mistake!” guy number one yells making guy number two scoff. “What? You think this is funny?” guy one yells. “Huh?” he repeats pushing the other guy back.

“C’mon Sam. Shit happens and you’re not fucking perfect  either!” Guy two shouts.

The moment guy two pushes back Ian starts moving again trying to hurry up and get out of their way.

“You!” one of them yells and Ian stops in his tracks. “Yes you red. I'm talking to you.” Ian slowly turns around to find it's Sam who's addressing him. “Need you to settle something for us.”

“M…me?” Ian stammers out wondering why they would ask for his opinion.

“Really Sam? You’re asking _him_?” guy two whose name Ian is yet to learn sneers. “He looks fucking fifteen years old.”

“I'm way older than that.” Ian mumbles with a scowl but he's pretty sure the two men don’t care.

“Shut up!” Sam snaps at his friends before grabbing Ian's shoulder so hard it hurts. “I told this asshole to not fuck my sister but guess what he did?”

Ian looks between the two brunettes. They’re drunk. He can tell now that he's closer, and not to mention Sam’s breath. “He fucked him?” he replies timidly.

“Bingo! Then I warned him not break her heart but guess what?”

Ian swallows when Sam’s grip on his shoulder tightens. “He… he broke her heart.”

“Over and over and fucking over again!” Sam shouts letting go of Ian so hard he stumbles back. “Tell me I won't be justified if I decided to kick his ass _right_ _now_.” He says stepping up the other guy’s face. This really has nothing to do with Ian so he slowly starts to reverse. “Don’t you take another step red. I'm not done with you.”

Ian freezes in place looking around. The street is weirdly deserted which makes him feel even more scared. It doesn’t help that darkness is creeping in. He flinches when the other guy pushes Sam back before punching him hard. Sam caught off guard, falls to the ground. Nameless guy turns to Ian angrily.

“You think he's right?”

Ian blinks at him and shakes his head. “I have… I have to go home.”

“Home to your _mommy?”_

“I'm not fifteen years old!”

“Well you look it.” Guy spits.

“Leave him alone Rick.”

“Can't do that. You already got him involved.” Rick replies stepping up to Ian making the redhead visibly shake.

Ian shuts his eyes tight waiting for what's coming when he hears a familiar voice that makes him release a loud shaky exhale of relief. “Everything alright here?”

“Who the fuck are you?” Rick snaps.

Ian on the other hand can't concentrate on anything with Mickey's hand on his lower back. “You okay?” Mickey whispers taking Ian's breath away. His thumb rubs Ian's skin comfortingly and Ian berates himself internally for getting hard at a time like this. All he can do is nod wordlessly. When he does Mickey lets him go to step in front on him so he's all up on Rick’s face. “We got a problem?” he asks blowing smoke in Rick’s face.

The sadness Ian had felt at losing Mickey's touch is replaced by the heavy arousal he’s getting by watching the scene unfold. Mickey is shorter than Rick but that has never stopped him from kicking anyone’s ass before. Fuck, why did he have to be so hot?

“No.” Rick Replies shaking his head clearly intimidated by Mickey's demeanor. “Not with freckles anyway.”

“Good.” Mickey replies with a flick of his cigarette. “Walk away.” He thumbs his nose which is usually his signal for when he's about to give someone a beat down.

Rick nods before walking backwards and helping Sam off the ground. The two take off after that. Mickey straightens his black leather jacket before turning around to look at Ian who places his bag on his crotch to hide his hard on.

“Gallagher,” Mickey starts. “who are they and how they fuck did you get involved with them, huh?” he asks running a hand across Ian's hair to no doubt straighten it. Ian’s heart rate goes up like it usually does around Mickey. “C’mon. Let’s go.”  Mickey grabs his bag swinging it on his shoulders before leading the way to his car.

Ian exhales in relief when Mickey doesn’t see he's hard. That shit would have been embarrassing. They walk quietly to Mickey's car where the latter opens the door for him with a smile.

“Buckle up.” Mickey hands Ian's his bag with a bigger smile before closing the door.

Ian for the life of him can't stop grinning.

 

**+**

 

When they get to the apartment Mandy isn’t home. It’s rare but it happens. Very few instances Ian will find himself alone with Mickey. He appreciates this time alone but he can never make good use of it because he spends the time being nervous.

“Have a seat. I'll order us some pizza.” Mickey says softly placing Ian's bag on the coffee table before heading towards the kitchen.

Ian sighs rubbing his hands across his jeans to wipe off his sweaty palms. He has never met any other human being that makes him this fucking nervous. _Shit_.

“Hawaiian’s your favorite, right?” Mickey shouts from the kitchen.

“He knows my favorite pizza?” Ian asks himself completely surprised.

“Ian!”

“Yeah… yes! Yes it is!” he replies quickly making Mickey chuckle.

The brunette comes over with a bottle of champagne and places two cups on the table before sitting next to Ian. “I usually don’ take this girly shit but we had a party at the office and I usually bring Mandy souvenirs.”

“I…” Ian clears his throat. “I know.”

Mickey laughs softly. “Bitch told me to bring at least three bottles today. It's her boyfriend’s birthday tomorrow or some shit.”

“Yeah.” Ian nods. “He turns twenty six.”

Mickey hums pouring them the drinks. “Cheers.” He says lifting his cup and Ian stares at his own that’s on the table. He wants to reach for it but Mickey is seated too close to him, their thighs almost touching which means Ian's hands can't stop shaking. He can't let Mickey see that. He's pretty sure he’d die of shame. “Ian.” Mickey prompts. Ian looks at him but quickly diverts his eyes when he meets concern. Mickey places his drink on the table and takes one of Ian's hands. “You're shaking.” He points out frowning, worried. “Is it those guys? Did they hurt you before I got there?” Ian shakes his head ‘no.’ “You sure?” Mickey is rubbing his shaky hand now and Ian finds himself calming down. “Cause I will fucking hunt them down and bring you their heads.”

Ian snorts, the laughter taking him by surprise. It gets a pleased smile out of Mickey. “On a silver platter?” he asks shyly.

“On a silver fucking platter.” Ian finds himself blushing and he turns his face away. “Your face is as red as your hair right now. You think I'm lying?”

“No.” Ian is quick to reply. “I'm just… you would do that for me?”

Mickey nods once and Ian finds himself exhaling before reaching for his cup of champagne. He quickly downs it needing to get his shit together. His hand feels cold when Mickey lets him go so he can reach for the bottle. “That’s no good. We were supposed to cheers or some shit.”

Ian blushes again with a giggle. Mickey hands him some more and lifts his own. “To…?” Ian trails off.

“Friendship.” Mickey replies.

“We...we’re friends?”

“Course we are Gallagher. Wouldn’t have helped you otherwise.” Mickey says with a smirk that makes Ian almost jizz his pants.

It takes everything he has not to blurt out _I love you._ so instead he knocks their cups together and echoes Mickey. “To friendship.”

Ian figures it's not what he wants them to be, but it's a start.


	3. Chapter 3

“Your turn.” Mandy says.

“I don’t trust you with this game.”

Mandy giggles. “Don’t be a sore loser. If you want you can shuffle on the next round.” she says laughing. They're seated on the carpet of the apartment playing poker and Ian is losing big time.

“Not sure if I want another round.”

“Pussy.”

“Hey!” Ian protests hitting Mandy's hand so the cards she’s holding scatter everywhere.

“That’s cheating!” Mandy shouts before pushing Ian on the floor and getting on top of him.

They're busy fighting for dominance when there’s a loud angry knock on the door.

“What the fuck?” Mandy mutters before getting off of Ian. She opens the door and her frown depends. “Who the fuck are you?”

The intruder pushes the door open roughly getting past her. “Where is he? Where the fuck is he?”

Without bothering to shut the door Mandy comes to stand in front of the fuming guy. “I won't ask again. Who the fuck are you and what are you doing in my house?”

“I'm Reggie and I need to find Mickey. He's a fucking asshole!” he shouts as Mandy is busy rolling her eyes so hard it looks painful.

“What did my brother do?”

“He fucked Vince!” Reggie shouts before turning to look at Ian. “You! Are you fucking him too!” he points an angry accusatory finger at the redhead. Ian shakes his head ‘no’ fervently and Reggie shifts his glare to Mandy. “I need to talk to him.”

“Are you dating my brother?” Mandy asks.

“No.”

“Then I'm confused as to what right you think you have to be here, whining.” Mandy spits angrily.

“I am not whining!” Reggie protests. “I'm…” he takes a deep breath and sniffs. Ian swallows when he notices the dude wants to cry. “I love… shit.”

Mandy scoffs. “You love Mickey? What are you, an idiot?”

Reggie looks at Mandy intently. “He fucked Vince.” He says as a way of explanation. Ian wonders who this Vince person is that has Reggie this worked up.

“Mickey doesn’t have a boyfriend, he can fuck whoever he wants.”

Ian deflates as he takes in the scene unfolding in front  of him. He is Reggie. Ian is fucking Reggie. The guy thinks he’s in love with Mickey because the latter fucks him on the regular. And now his heart just got broken because Mickey also fucked Vince. This guy who stands at six feet tall with broad shoulders and a perfectly chiseled  jaw is among the guys Mickey treats like shit. And here Ian is who barely looks his age, shy and timid as fuck, freckled and Mickey probably wouldn’t give him the time of day if it weren’t for Mandy. Stupid, naïve Ian is already in love with the bad boy and Mickey doesn’t even know.

His heart breaks with Reggie’s.

Reggie looks at Mandy, pain in his eyes. He opens his mouth a few times but ends up lacking something to say. So he walks out the still open door and leaves. Silence resonates in the apartment for a few minutes, both occupants in thought. Ian speaks up after a while.

“Why do you justify his behavior?” he asks softly.

Mandy shuts the door and looks at him. “Believe it or not, every time I have to tell these guys off, or every time I'm harsh, it's for their own good.”

Ian gets off the carpet and sits on the couch instead. He frowns at his best friend. “How?”

“BECAUSE SOMEONE NEEDS TO MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND IAN!” Mandy shouts breathing hard. “Someone needs to make _you_ understand.”  She points at him. “I get it, he's good-looking, he's got fucking swag or whatever, great in bed even, like most say. But Mickey is allergic to commitment. Always has been, and he will never change.” Her voice goes soft as she walks closer to him. “Not for these guys, not for you.”

Ian ducks his head taking in every painful word leaving Mandy’s mouth. He pulls out his phone and calls Earl from class. For weeks now the guy has been asking Ian out to lunch but he didn’t even consider him an option. This morning Earl had wanted to grab dinner so Ian texts a simple, **Yes**. The reply comes immediately with a time and place. So Ian hugs Mandy goodnight and heads out.

 

                                                                               **+**

 

Ian is seated across Earl watching him go on and on about one thing or another. He can't concentrate because Earl is all wrong. He is all wrong.

His eyes are green like his own when they should be blue.

His hair is too fucking long.

He is taller than Ian, he doesn’t curse and he's too fucking nice.

It simply won't do. _He_ won't do.

“I have to go.” Ian gets up abruptly and announces.

“Already?” Earl asks confused. “You didn’t even touch your dinner. Did I say something wrong? I'm sorry Ian I'll do better, I promise.”

“I'm sorry.” Ian apologises before leaving with no explanation.

 

                                                                               **+**

 

The next day is on a weekend so Ian is just watching something with his siblings on the lazy Saturday afternoon when Mandy calls. Apparently she has weed and Mickey brought home tones of alcohol. Ian doesn’t need convincing. He goes upstairs for a quick shower and is out and headed  to the L. The entire week he's had exams so this is exactly what he needs to unwind.

When he gets there Mandy and her boyfriend are already drinking and dancing even though the volume isn’t turned up. Ian hugs them hello and immediately takes a swig of the first bottle he lays his eyes on. He rarely gets to do this so letting loose feels really good. The three of them are taking turns on the blue bong and laughing when the door opens. Mickey walks in and Ian chokes on the smoke he's just inhaled. He looks so good Ian just want to undress him and sit on his lap so he can ride him like a fucking rodeo.

The brunette is wearing a black pea coat and Ian has never seen him look sexier. That’s a lie Mickey is always sexy but right now he's making Ian forget how to take a breath. Of course he's highly disappointed to see some guy –a new guy- walk in after Mickey. They both take off their coats before walking towards the three of them.

“That’s my bitch of a sister Mandy and her boyfriend.” Mickey introduces. “And that adorable puppy over there is her best friend Ian.” He says pointing at Ian whose face feels extremely warm that he knows he must be blushing big time. Mandy just shakes her head at him fondly. “You can join them if you like, gotta take a piss.” Mickey instructs his date flippantly before heading towards the bathroom.

The guy who Mickey forgot to introduce takes a seat on the second couch before speaking. “Hi, I'm Vince.”  

Ian chokes on his drink and Mandy has to leave her boyfriend’s side to come and pat Ian’s back a few times. Vince pours himself a drink and Ian finds himself involuntarily staring daggers at the guy Mandy has to keep giving him pleading looks. His hatred for Vince is instant and it surprises him especially since he doesn’t know the guy. But he doesn’t need to. Fucker is doing Mickey, and that’s all it takes for Ian to dislike him.

Mickey joins them a few minutes later and takes a seat next to Vince. Ian feels his heart warm when Mickey sits on Vince’s right side which is the side nearest to Ian who is on the recliner. That little action makes him so happy even though God knows it wasn’t intentional. He stretches his hand towards Mandy and the latter hands him the bong. Ian needs to be high as fuck.

 

                                                                               **+**

 

_Thirty Five Minutes Later_

 

Ian feels fucking amazing, so good. He rests his feet on the table, hands behind his head, then shuts his eyes. He smiles to himself as he basks in the floaty feeling.

“Get your fucking feet off my table!” Mickey snaps.

Heart beating, Ian opens his eyes and  immediately calms down when he sees the command was directed at Vince.

Vince looks at Ian’s feet that are on the table then looks at Mickey confused. “But Ian's got his feet on the tab…”

“Did I fucking stutter?” Mickey asks firmly and Vince does as told. Mickey clicks his tongue in irritation before lighting up a cigarette. Ian can't help the pleased smile that forms on his face. It prompts Mickey to insult him. “Fuck off.”

“Jesus Mick!” Ian exclaims when cold liquid gets splashed on his face. He glares at the bad boy who only continues to smirk at him his left eyebrow daring him to do something.

Ian blames his high for the courage he gets to flip Mickey off. When the latter laughs it leaves Ian giddy and happier than he’s been since fucking Vince showed his stupid face.

.

The five of them keep going for hours and before Ian knows it everyone is passed out except him and Mickey. “Fuck I need to stop.” Ian says with a sigh.

Mickey chuckles. “Already? Thought you were bad ass Gallagher.” Mickey teases.

Ian shakes his head and stares as Mickey inhales deeply looking right at him with narrowed eyes. He blows out the smoke and they both watch as the smoke disappears. At some point he took off his clothes and now only has a white tank. Those arms… God Ian can look at those arms all fucking day. He imagines biting on one as Mickey pounds away on top of him. Shit, he can't think about that. So instead he focuses on the lips he'd give anything to kiss.

“You're pretty.” Ian finds himself saying.

Mickey laughs and looks at him. “That you or the weed talking?”

Ian leans forward. “Me.”

“Yeah, okay.” Mickey says dismissively. He obviously thinks Ian is joking which couldn’t be further than what's happening right now.

“I mean it Mick. You're the prettiest boy I've ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on.”

Mickey looks at Vince who's passed out beside him then the couple on the other couch who are also asleep. Ian does the same before both men turn to look at each other.

“I wanna touch you.” Ian whispers. Tomorrow he will be very shocked that he was able to say these words. But tonight, tonight he can say them and that’s all that matters. Mickey blinks at him but doesn’t say anything so Ian takes that as his go ahead.

He slides off the chair and onto the floor before crawling towards Mickey. “Gallagher. Ian, what are you doing?” Mickey asks eyes wide when Ian crawls between his legs. The redhead places both hands on Mickey's knees.

“I want to touch you Mick. Please let me.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

Ian takes in the shocked look on Mickey's face but he doesn't stop. He still moves confidently and settles between the brunette's legs. 

Mickey swallows loudly and shakes his head as if trying to prove he's seeing right. "Ian you fucking can't..." 

"Why not?" Ian glances at Vince who's still passed out before looking back up at Mickey. "It's not like he's going to." He reaches for Mickey's belt and unbuckles it. 

Mickey grabs both his hands, pausing his actions. "Shit Ian... You are... We can't.... I can't... This is a terrible fucking idea." The hot man above him stammers out. 

Ian looks at him and pulls his hands away, determined to get what he wants. So he undoes the button too. He reaches inside Mickey's trouser and grabs the half chub. He smirks to himself knowing as much as Mickey is protesting, his body is yet to get the memo. He jerks it a few times before licking his lips eagerly. Mickey's dick is beautiful. It stands at attention, cut, pink and ready, the tip shiny with precum. It feels good in his hand. Soft and firm. It has the right amount of thickness and the perfect length. Ian has never wanted anything in his mouth as much as he wants the dick in his palm. It literally makes him salivate. 

As he's admiring the perfect cock, mickey grabs both his cheeks and makes Ian look at him. "Ian... you can't." 

Ian shakes his head no. He doesn't want to hear it. "Please Mick." He's stroking slowly up and down the length before rubbing his thumb against the slit. "I want to." 

"You... Shit. We.... MOTHERFUCKER!" Mickey shouts when Ian's lips wrap around his cock. 

Usually Ian would stop to worry about whether or not the rest had heard that. Shit, usually he would never do this with other people in the room. But right now he doesn't give a flying fuck. He's got Mickey's dick in his mouth and its the most amazing fucking feeling in the world. Mickey is cursing repeatedly and bucking up into Ian's mouth. He's grabbing onto the arm of the couch, his hair, Ian's hair. He's moaning and biting his bottom lip as Ian sucks him off expertly. 

He is driving Mickey wild and he loves it. He's enjoying the feel of it his tongue. The taste, the way it's perfectly heavy and soft on his tongue. Shit. Ian is already obsessed. This has been his dream since he first laid eyes on the handsome man. To please him. To pleasure him. To show him he is just as good as those other guys he fucks. 

Ian pulls out to lick at the slit. He then licks the dick from top to bottom before reaching with his left hand to fondle at Mickey's balls. 

"Fuck Ian! How are you so fucking good at this?" Mickey asks completely wrecked and sounding surprised. 

That gives Ian even more motivation to keep going. So without wasting anymore time he takes Mickey's dick back in his mouth, this time deep throating him. He doesn't stop till he feels the tip touch the back of his throat. He gags once, but he's right back on track again. 

"Shit Ian, what the fuck!" Ian hums and Mickey tugs on his hair quickly, pulling Ian off his dick as he shoots his load. He comes all over his trousers and the couch. Glancing around the room again. Ian wouldn't have minded swallowing and showing Mickey he's not a fucking pussy. "Shit Gallagher. Where did you learn how to do that?" Mickey asks. He reaches out with his thumb and touches Ian's lips. "Shit you are so fucking..." He trails off clearly running out of words. 

Ian ignores his own raging hard on in favor of standing up slowly. Mickey is looking at him, watching him intently. Especially his lips, he can't stop looking at them. So Ian presses their lips together. Mickey heartily receives him like he'd been waiting for it, but didn't know how to ask. As soon as their lips touch Ian moans loudly at the back of his throat. Today must be 'dreams come true day' because he is making out with Mickey fucking Milkovich. A kiss that takes his breath away. A kiss that makes his knees wobble he has to sit on Mickey's lap. And when he feels Mickey's hand on his hard dick, rubbing on top of his jeans, he is not surprised by how fast he comes. 

Sucking off Mickey had almost gotten him there so Mickey's hand on his dick was only going to push him over the edge. 

"That was fucking amazing Ian." Mickey whispers. " _You_ were fucking amazing." Ian blushes before touching their foreheads together. "Didn't know you had some bad in you." Mickey whispers again. 

"Kiss me." They both say at the same time before doing exactly that. 

This time it's slow and with purpose. Mickey wraps his hands fully around him and Ian loves being in his hold like this. Loves how he fits perfectly. Shit, Mickey is a great kisser just like Ian imagined. He sucks Ian's tongue into his mouth and the redhead feels a jolt of electricity shoot through his entire body. And in that moment he knows he will never want to kiss anybody else but Mickey. He is always going to want to kiss Mickey. For the rest of his days Ian wants to be stuck here on Mickey's lap as they kiss endlessly until their lips start aching. 

Vince groans and shifts next to them and they both freeze. Mickey let's him gently off his lap and Ian goes back to sitting on the recliner. He watches Mickey intently while rubbing his lips that moments ago were against Mickey's. 

Ian watches fucking Vince sit up groggily and his hate for the man intensifies. Way worse that it was before. Mickey stands up and leads the way to his room. Ian finds comfort in the fact that Vince can barely walk so he won't be fucking his Mickey tonight. 

Mickey stands by the entrance to the living room and looks at Ian. They stare at each other silently for a while before before Mickey finally leaves. 

If Ian thought he was in love with Mickey before, he just fell a million times harder. 

 

**°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

When Ian wakes up he's lying on the couch. He sits up rubbing his eyes. "Fuck." He whispers. He doesn't get headaches anymore after drinking but he doesn't feel very nice either. Nothing coffee can't fix though.

"Here you go." He opens his eyes to find Mandy handing him said coffee. "I feel like shit." She says sitting on the opposite couch.

"How did I get here?" He asks pointing at the couch.

"Mickey. You didn't look comfortable passed out on that thing." She points at the recliner.

Ian feels all warm inside. Wondering what's next for him and Mickey. What does the blow job and the make out session mean? Who is Ian to Mickey now?

Shit.

Ian's warm feeling turns to nervousness and fear real quick. What if he gets treated like Reggie? What if he gets cheated on like Vince? What if Mickey becomes indifferent all of a sudden? What will Ian do then? He doesn't think he can take it. He doesn't think he's strong enough. He _knows_ for a fact he's not strong enough. 

"Hey, hey, hey what's wrong?" Mandy asks making him realise he's crying. She is next to him in a second. She places her cup on the table before taking Ian's and doing the same. She then pulls him in his arms. "What's going on? Talk to me." 

Ian sniffs and holds her tightly. "Hyperthetically." 

Mandy scoffs. "Okay." 

"Do you think he would ever go for me?" 

Mandy sighs as she starts caressing his hair. "My brother," she swallows. "he's... complicated. But I'm not gonna lie, you're not his usual type." Ian nods weeping even more. "Shhh... this doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you baby. It just means Mickey is... shit." She stops when Ian cries harder. "Let's not talk about this anymore. I just wish you didn't fall in love with him. It would be so much easier." 

Ian doesn't disagree. 

 

**°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

Ian doesn't see Mickey for a week which really breaks his heart. Mickey always comes home. Since Ian has known the siblings the bad boy never sleeps out. And now Ian has been coming over daily and he keeps missing Mickey. This hurts him greatly especially after what happened between them. 

Ian can't believe he actually had the guts to make a pass at Mickey, but he did. And they made out. And now Ian needs to know where they stand. Was Ian a one time thing like many before him? 

It's on a Wednesday afternoon when Ian leaves school to head over to the apartment. He's just gotten off the elevator when he sees Mickey closing the door on his way out. When he sees Ian he freezes and goes back in quickly. Ian is right on his heels. He pushes the door open but it doesn't give. Cursing, Ian reaches for his keys and unlocks the door to find Mickey pacing back and forth. 

Ian shuts the door and leans against it. He stares at Mickey's shoes. "I didn't want to believe it but it's true. Youre avoiding me." Ian says quietly, his voice laced with hurt. 

He finally looks up and sees Mickey run a hand through his perfectly gelled hair. "Ian." 

Ian looks into Mickey's eyes chewing on the inside of his cheek. His heart is pounding and his stomach is hurting, nervous as to where this conversation is going. "Yeah?" 

"I know what you want from me but I can't give it to you." 

"All I want is you Mick." 

Mickey shakes his head no. "I am not... you need someone else. Literally anybody else." 

"I don't want anybody else!" Ian shouts stubbornly. 

"Don't you get it Ian? I'm only going to fucking break your heart! It's who I am and i don't want, to do that to you. You're too..." 

"Too what?" Ian probes stepping forward. "Ugly? Young? Naive? Which is it?" Now Ian is angry. 

"No! None of those things." Mickey grabs both his cheeks and it takes Ian back to that night. "You are beautiful, and sweet and so fucking perfect." He looks at Ian earnestly and the latter just want to kiss him. Again. "And you deserve someone who can treat you like you deserve. That person ain't me Ian." 

Ian holds on Mickey's wrists and caresses his pulse points. "You haven't even given us a chance." He begs with a whisper. 

Mickey pulls him forward and bumps their foreheads together. "You don't want to be with me Ian. Trust me." 

"Why not?" Ian asks desperately. 

"Because... You just can't." 

Ian pulls away from Mickey's touch and ducks his head. "But I really like you though." 

"Stop." Mickey says before walking towards the door. He opens it and glances back at Ian. "Stop liking me. I'm not worth your affection Ian, I'm not." 

"Mickey!" Ian shouts breathlessly but the other man has already left. "No." Ian mutters to himself. "No." He repeats.

This can't be it. He won't let it. He refuses to accept it. It can't end this way. Mickey thinks he's wrong for Ian. But Ian begs to differ. Mickey is perfect and is amazing. And he has been good to Ian since the day they met. Ian thinks he's the sweetest man he's ever met. This other Mickey Mandy talks about is not the Mickey _he_ knows.

And he will be dammed if he just let's him go. Mickey doesn't think he'll be good for Ian, then Ian just needs to show him that he can.  


	5. Chapter 5

Ian had tried studying at the Gallagher house but he kept getting distracted by one thing or another. But as much as he loves his family, he needs to get his assignment done. So of course he heads over to the apartment. He smiles as he settles in by the kitchen table. He scoffs when he remembers there was a time Mandy joked that he might as well move in. 

.

Ian is chewing on his pen in concentration when someone knocks on the door. He pulls back from the table and heads towards it. Opening it, he looks at the brown haired guy on the other side in surprise.

"Umm..." The guy steps back to look up at the number on the door. "I'm looking for Mickey's apartment?" 

"This is it." Ian whispers irritably. 

"He umm... he told me I'd find his sister Mandy?" The guy continues. 

Ian tries not to glare as he steps out of the way, keeping the door open so douchebag can walk in. _"Fuck!"_ He thinks. It's been a couple of days since he and Mickey had that talk and Ian hasn't seen any guys around the apartment. He'd been so happy about that, assuming Mickey was thinking about them. About their situation. 

It hurts to find out just how wrong he's been. 

He ignores the new guest and goes back to the kitchen. Ian is ready to keep up with his reading except he can't concentrate for shit, knowing there's some guy in the house with him waiting to fuck Mickey. So shutting his books and putting them away, he grabs two beers from the fridge and heads to the living room. He finds dick -Ian decides is his name- on his phone. 

He hands him a beer and sits on the other couch. "When did he tell you he'd be here?" He asks. 

"Thanks." Dick mumbles with a tiny smile taking the beer from Ian. "Just texted." He lifts his phone. "Said to give him ten minutes." 

Ian nods looking around the room. "You know he's got a boyfriend, right?" He lies. 

Dick shakes his head with a chuckle. "Reggie was not Mickey's boyfriend. He wished he was but he wasn't." 

"I don' know who the fuck Reggie is, but that's not Mick's boyfriend." The lie extends. Ian is honestly proud of how confident he is even as he bullshits.

Dick frowns deeply before placing his beer on the table. "What?" Ian shrugs, placing both feet on the table. "Fuck." He smirks when Dick gets up. "I told him. I told him like ten motherfucking times. I hate cheating." Ian just shrugs again. "Asshole." Dick mutters before aggressively opening the door and walking out.

Ian belches loudly and picks up the neglected beer feeling pretty proud of himself. He then goes to the kitchen and cooks some rice for the beef stew he saw in the fridge.

 

                    **°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

When Mickey shows up twenty minutes later, the table has been set and Ian has covered a plate of food with foil. 

"Damn, smells good." Mickey moans making Ian blush deeply. "You make that?" Ian nods his words failing him. Mickey sheds his leather jacket and joins him on the kitchen table where Ian's already done eating. The gorgeous brunette has on a black sleeveless shirt and Ian licks his lips just looking at the exposed arms. He sits across from Ian and the redhead takes a deep breath. Fuck, he loves how Mickey smells. "You were studying, huh?" Ian nods. Mickey hums in acknowledgement as he chews. "This is so good Ian. And I was fucking starving so thanks." 

Ian rubs his sweaty palms under the table. "I...only cooked the rice." 

Mickey grins and Ian looks away shyly. "Still." 

"Okay." Ian whispers looking back at Mickey. He watches as his kissable full lips form an 'o' "Did anyone come around by any chance?" 

Ian shakes his head 'no' "I mean yes." He quickly amends. 

"He leave?" Ian nods. "Dammit." 

"He wasn't even that good looking." Ian shrugs. "You could do better." He adds eyes on the table. 

"Oh yeah?" Mickey smirks. "Like who, you?" 

Ian shrugs again with a shy smile. "Just a... suggestion." 

Mickey finishes his food and grabs Ian's beer. "You're my sister's bestfriend." 

"I'm aware." 

Mickey just shakes his head and gets up. He pecks Ian on the cheek and touches the spot with his thumb. "Thanks for lunch." 

Ian opens his mouth to reply but nothing comes out. Not that it matters because Mickey is out the door again. 

 

                    **°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

Ian and Mickey are hunched over looking at his book as Mickey helps him with his homework. Ian finds it hard to concentrate when Mickey is right next to him smelling like heaven. He's just got a loose T-shirt on that's nothing special yet he's still sexy as fuck. 

"There. You have your answer." Mickey finishes pushing the book back towards Ian. 

The redhead has no clue what's even going on. "Umm...thanks." He manages. 

"Course." Mickey stands up and Ian watches the bubble butt walk away until he's out of sight. He hears the shower turn on and shakes his head to get images of a naked Mickey out of his head. He turns back to his book and is trying to figure out Mickey's calculations when a phone rings. It's Mickey's. 

 **Aiden calling**.

Ian receives it.

 _"Hello? Mickey? Are we still on for tonight?"_ This Aiden person asks. _"Want you so bad."_ He continues his voice going deep. 

"This ain't Mickey." Ian speaks up. 

_"Okay, who the fuck are you?"_

"His boyfriend. Who the fuck are _you?_ " 

 _"Oh shit."_ Aiden hangs up immediately.

 

****°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°****

 

Ian is watching _Double Impact_ on the big plasma TV that Mickey recently purchased. He recently got a promotion and they're supposed to move to a bigger apartment in two months too. Mickey's doing good and Ian can't help but feel extremely proud of the bad boy. Fuck, he's perfect. Hot, accomplished, bad ass, good in bed if how all these guys after him is anything to go by. 

He is fucking perfect. 

And Ian wants him all to himself. _And_  he won't stop until he gets him. 

Mickey walks out of his bedroom shirtless and with grey sweats hanging low, exposing the two dimples just above his ass. Ian has to stop looking at him or else he will come untouched right there on the couch. 

"Make some room you puppy." Mickey says kicking Ian's feet off the couch and sitting next to him. 

Ian smiles goofily. "There's one more couch and a recliner Mick." 

"Yeah well," Mickey starts, lighting up a cigarette. "I want this one." 

Ian giggles with a blush before fully sitting up and making the space. 

"The lamb needs thirty more minutes and we'll be good to go." Mandy joins them handing them a can off beer each. 

"Lamb sounds delicious." Ian says. 

There's a knock on the door and Mickey quickly gets up and goes to open it. 

"Eager much?" Mandy calls out getting a middle finger in return. 

"Huh?" Ian questions. 

"He hasn't gotten laid since that day we partied here." 

"No." Ian whispers eyes wide in surprise. 

Mandy nods. "Work." She explains. "And for some reason guys keep changing their minds." Ian looks away so Mandy doesn't tell that's on him. "Who knows? Maybe word has gotten around and now no one wants to hook up with casanova Mickey Milkovich." She laughs. 

"What about Vince?" 

"He's in Texas. Went to visit his grandma." 

Ian nods. Maybe he's supposed to feel bad, but he doesn't. He's happy that no one is fucking Mickey. If he doesn't get to, no one else will. So he downs his entire beer then belches unrepentantly. 

Mickey comes back with a hot tall black guy who's got nice long curly hair. Ian wants to chop it all off. He grabs the remote and turns up the volume fully intending to ignore them. A task that turns out to be very hard when both men join him and Mandy. 

"Gonna go check on the food." Mandy excuses herself. 

Mickey looks around then curses. "Shit. Where's my phone?" 

Ian chews on his bottom lip as he watches Mickey look for his phone. It rings and he curses before heading to his bedroom to get it. Ian waits until he's sure it's just him and new guy in the room. 

"You know," he clears his throat as new guy looks at him. "Mickey and I hooked up recently and this morning i found out I have syphillis." New guy sneers at him. "It's taken care of of course but i haven't found a way to tell him yet." Ian whispers pointing at the direction of Mickey's bedroom. Ian watches with bated breath, praying the guy buys the lie.

"Tell him i had an emergency." It's almost comical how fast new guy rushes out of there. 

Ian chuckles but shuts up when Mickey walks back into the living room. 

"The fuck's Alex, bathroom?" Mickey asks sitting next to Ian and placing his feet on the table. 

"Said he had to leave. Emergency." Ian readily offers. 

"You have got to be shitting me." Mickey groans and slides down the couch in frustration. "I'm gonna die of blue balls. Is that a thing?" 

Ian stares at Mickey's naked chest and licks his lips. "I could..."

"Shh."

"Just a quick..."

"Shh." 

"You loved it last time I..."

"Shhhhhhhhh..." 

"But,"

"Shh." 

Ian tries to open his mouth and he gets shushed everytime until he gives up.

Dammit. 

What's the need of chasing all these guys away if Mickey won't fuck him anyway? 

He crosses his arms and leans back with a pout making Mickey laugh. 

 

                    **°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

Vince comes back on a Saturday. 

Ian wants to strangle him.

But he's not gonna do that. Because it's illegal. But it doesn't make Ian want it less. The blond finds him and Mandy since Mickey is stuck in traffic on his way home. Ian wants him out of there as soon as possible. But lying to him is going to be a bit difficult since Vince seems to have been hooking up with Mickey for a while now. 

Ian finds himself getting relieved at the fact that Mickey doesn't do boyfriends. Otherwise that's what vince would be. 

He racks his brain for an excuse to send him away but he only comes up with one that would be effective. Now Mandy just needs to leave for Ian to do it. 

.

Except twenty minutes later the three of them are still watching some reality show that Ian can't pay attention to as long as Vince is still breathing the same air as him. So he decides, fuck it. 

"You know it's just a matter of time before Mickey dumps you, right?" 

Both Mandy and Vince look at him surprised. "Shut the fuck up." Vince snaps. 

"Especially since he's doing me now." He continues.

"Like fuck he is!" Vince stands up angrily so Ian does too. "He's mine." The blond points at his chest with conviction. 

Ian scoffs. "I bet Reggie thought the same thing." 

Mandy gasps, covering her mouth in shock while Vince glares at him, but doesn't manage to hide the hurt on his face. Too bad. Ian is not sorry, Mickey is his. 

"When he fucks me," Ian continues. "when he kisses me, you don't exist." 

Vince laugs. "Now i know you're full of shit." Ian's breath hitches. "Mickey doesn't kiss." Ian narrows his eyes surprised by the revelation. That night -that Ian will never forget- Mickey had kissed him like it was second nature. What does this mean? He finds himself smirking cockily. The smile in Vince's face dies, getting replaced by a betrayed look instead. "You've kissed him?" It's a whisper laced with disbelief. 

Ian blinks with a sharp inhale. Mickey has never kissed Vince. It's taking everything he has not to jump for joy. 

"No." Vince shakes his head. "Everyone knows Mickey doesn't do kissing. You're lying." 

Ian's smug smirk turns into a proud smile. Happy to be the exception. "Yeah well, he kisses me." Ian shrugs. 

Vince shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath trying to calm down. It obviously doesn't work because he yells, "FUCK!" Before grabbing his jacket off the couch and racing out. 

Ian stays in place avoiding Mandy. 

"Ian." He looks at her. "What the fuck was that!" 


	6. Chapter 6

"Ian." Mandy insists. Ian rubs a hand across his hair and takes a seat. "What are you doing? Lying about fucking and kissing my brother. That's..." She shakes her head. "I can't even... Where are you even going with this?" Ian doesn't say anything. "What are you even hoping to accomplish here? Vince is not the first is he? Oh my God." It's Mandy's turn to scratch her hair as realization hits her. "You're the reason his dates keep bailing. Ian, what the fuck!" 

Ian shifts in place and looks at his best friend. "I don't want him fucking anybody else." 

"He's gonna catch on Ian. And say you are successful in chasing all this men away, then what? It's not like Mickey's gonna date you." 

Ian shrugs. "I don't care. As long as he's not fucking them either." 

"You're obsessed." 

Ian sighs. "I know." 

They sit there quiet for a while. Both of them in thought. "I get it." Mandy speaks up eventually. "He treats all these other guys like shit but he's nice to you." 

"And he kissed me." 

"Yeah. And he kissed you." Mandy repeats. "Wait, what?!"

Ian nods with a shy smile. "He did. He _really_ did." 

Mandy slumps back on the couch. "Well I'll be dammed.' 

 

                                   ▲●▲●▲●▲

 

A week later, one Friday night finds Ian alone at the Gallagher house. The last person to leave is Lip who won't be back until Monday. So as expected Ian packs a few clothes and heads over to the L. Mickey and Mandy will be moving to the north side soon to be closer to Mickey's work. Ian would still have to take the L but at least it will closer. 

Mandy once told him they wanted to get as far away from their former home as they could which is why they chose where they live now. When he gets there it's quarter after five and Ian can smell the food as soon as he gets off the elevator. Mandy was in school learning to be a chef so he and Mickey got to enjoy her delicious cooking a lot. 

"Smells good Mands." He says as soon as he walks in. Shedding off his jacket, he walks to the kitchen and hugs her from behind. "You good?" 

"Yeah. Learnt a new recipe for fish today so I'm trying it out. Looks exactly like my teacher's so yay!" She claps thrice. 

"Mmm." Ian hums when he takes a bite. "God, this is amazing." He praises making her grin happily. "How is Mickey not fat? He loves indulging in your food." 

"How are _you_ not fat? You eat here as much as he does." 

Ian shrugs. "My body is weird. Don't matter how much I eat..." He trails off. 

.

Mandy serves the dish with red wine and Ian eats to his full. They later wash the dishes then watch a movie as they finish off the rest of the wine. Mickey comes home late and exhausted so he eats quickly before retiring to bed. Mandy has to wake up early tomorrow so she heads to sleep too. 

Ian is left by himself but he chooses to finish watching the movie first. When he starts to doze off however, he puts the rest of the wine back in the fridge and goes to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Ian stares at his reflection in the mirror and starts blushing at the thought of what he's thinking of doing. He gaggles and wipes his mouth dry. He then stares at his reflection for a bit before shaking off his nerves. 

Ian pees before heading over to Mickey's bedroom. He knocks quietly, walks in then closes the door behind him. 

"Mickey?" He whispers. "Mick?" 

Mickey turns around to face his direction. "Ian?" He calls his voice groggy and heavy with sleep. "What are you doing here?" He asks around a yawn. 

"Can... can I sleep with you?" Ian manages to get out even as he waits to be rejected and sent away. Instead he looks on surprised as Mickey pushes back towards the wall, making space for him to get in. He then lifts the blanket and Ian takes off his trousers and sweater quickly so he's left in just a T-shirt and boxers. He practically rushes to get in beside the other man. Mickey chuckles lightly at his eagerness. "Are you drunk? You smell drunk." Mickey points out as soon as Ian settles in. 

"No." Ian breathes. "I only had a bottle and half of wine. Takes more than that to bring down a Gallagher." He quotes his father making Mickey smile. The curtains are not drawn so his room is being illuminated by the moon. 

"Don't you usually sleep with Mandy?" 

"I do." Ian replies but leaves it at that. Instead he rubs his cold feet against Mickey's warm ones but the latter doesn't complain. He just mutters, "fucker." before allowing him to rub their feet together. 

"So why are you here?" Mickey whispers. "In my room with me?"

"I am tired. And your room was closest." 

Mickey snorts. "Right. Just so we're clear, nothing's happening." 

"Okay." Ian replies with a smile. 

"I'm serious." Mickey says.

"Okay."

"Stop smiling." The brunette says closing Ian's lips together even though he can't stop smiling himself. 

Ian laughs. "Thanks Mick." 

"Fucker." 

 

                                    ▲●▲●▲●▲

 

 

The following day being a Saturday, Ian and Mandy go swimming at a hotel in the North side. Ian had woken up alone in Mickey's bed and in the apartment. But Mandy had come back later at around 11:00AM and asked him to go swimming.  So now here they were. Ian wasn’t swimming however, he was just by the pool in his trunks watching Mandy and everyone else swim. He was instead enjoying a warm beer at one of the tables by the pool.

He orders food and that’s when Mandy takes a break. “Fuck, swimming sure works out an appetite.” She says digging into her chicken. “So I have a question.”

Ian looks up from his own lunch. “What?”

“Where did you sleep last night?”

He looks away to watch a father dive into the water while holding his daughter. “The couch.”

“U-huh.” Mandy takes a sip of her water. “So why didn’t I see you this morning as I was leaving?” Ian chews guiltily still trying to avoid her eyes. “You fuck Mickey?”

“No!” he replies looking at her, his eyes wide. “I may have spent the night with him, but we didn’t have sex.”

“So you just slept. Like two brothers sharing a bed?”

Ian doesn’t like how that sounds. He doesn’t want to be Mickey's brother. He finds himself frowning at that. “No. Like two platonic _friends_.”

“U-huh.” Mandy says again. “Just be careful, alright? This is Mickey we’re talking about.”

“I know what I'm doing.”

“I hope so.” She replies.

 

                                    ▲●▲●▲●▲

 

Mickey finds Ian and Mandy playing poker at the apartment later that afternoon.  He heads into his bedroom and comes out changed into different clothes. “Yo puppy. Come with me.”  He calls and Ian deserts his best friend without a second thought.

“Where are we going?” Ian asks as he puts on his seatbelt.

“I, already bought the apartment so I need new furniture. Thought you might want to help pick them out.”

“Yeah. Of course.” Ian replies with a smile.

When they get to the shop Mickey lets Ian lead the way around the furniture store. Mickey talks while Ian listens. He talks about the promotion, his job and his boss who seems to like him for some reason. He opens up about how he never thought he’d be here as he was growing up. Which is why he had decided to take full advantage of his good luck.

Ian stops in front  of brown leather seats that he instantly falls in love with. “I'm proud of you Mick.” He says looking at the other man. His stomach gets butterflies when Mickey nods with a pleased smile.

“You like these?” Mickey asks.

“I do.” Ian replies caressing the arm.  “Don’t know why you asked me and not Mandy though.”

Mickey shrugs. “You practically live there. That place is yours as much as it is ours.”

Ian blushes making Mickey chuckle. He always does that anytime he makes Ian blush. “Thank you.” Mickey clears his throat and Ian looks at him curiously. The shorter man sits on the arm of the couch and looks up at Ian. The redhead shifts uneasily in place. “Wha…what's up?”

“You wanna tell me why all my lays keep leaving?”

Ian suddenly seems to remember he didn’t wipe his shoes and starts to inspect them. “I don’ know what you're talking about.”

“Really?” Mickey asks biting his bottom lip and Ian can tell he's trying to keep a smile from escaping. “You're a shitty liar Gallagher. Not to mention all these guys have you in common.” He says sitting down on the couch and tapping the cushion next to him. Ian takes a seat obediently. “I told them to come over, and they all left before I got there. Or I leave them in the room with you and suddenly they all get emergencies.” Mickey continues as Ian starts rubbing patterns on the brunettes left thigh. “Ian.” He calls softly.

“Yeah?” Ian replies just as quietly.

“Vince cornered be yesterday.” Ian's breath hitches but he doesn’t take his hand off Mickey's thigh. Instead he starts pulling on a loose thread. “Was pretty pissed that I kissed you and yet I'm always refusing to kiss him. How did he know about that?”

Ian finally looks up to find Mickey watching him intently. “Mick?”

“Yeah?” Mickey replies licking his lips. The action automatically draws Ian's eyes there.

“I'm not sorry.” Ian says before moving forward and pressing their lips together.


	7. Chapter 7

Ian is rolling the dough while Mandy shapes and makes the cookies. It's one of those lazy Saturdays where you don’t really feel like leaving the house or doing anything.

“So how does it feel like to be classmates with your boyfriend?” he asks.

Mandy groans. “Sucks. You can't get hit on without him having a hissy fit. I tell the fucker he doesn’t own me all time, but does he listen?” Mandy complains.

“I think it would be nice to have someone get jealous over me.” Ian says shyly.

“Your ex never used to?”

“Not really. He didn’t even love me so he could have cared less.” He says smiling sadly. “First and only relationship I’ve ever had.”

“He didn’t deserve your virginity.”

“No he did not.” Ian concurs. He’d have saved himself if he knew he would one day come across Mickey Milkovich.

“So what happened when you went couch shopping?” Mandy asks.

Ian shrugs before opening the fridge and taking out a can of coke. “Nothing. I picked out the couch and then we came home.”

“Bullshit.”

Ian smiles. “Fine. You were right.” he says seeping on the drink. “He found out I've been chasing off his one night stands or whatever.”

“Was he mad?” Mandy asks before answering her own question. “He wasn’t, was he? It's like he's incapable of being mean to you. Proly why he's always calling you puppy.”

Ian feels his face getting warm. “I would never be mean to him either.”

“You would never be mean to anybody.” She laughs. “Except Vince of course.” Ian laughs too. “He gets on your nerves, doesn’t he?”

“Yes!” Ian lets out. “Like, he's an idiot and an asshole. What does Mickey see in him? His good looks? I refuse to believe Mick is that shallow.”

“You only see Mickey as perfect.”

“That’s because he is.” Ian says with conviction.

“Oh Ian.”             

 

                                   ▲●▲●▲●▲

 

Ian leans against Mickey's door and watches him pack. His nose flares and his heart tears at the possibility that the other man is leaving to spend the night with some guy. He's trying his best to hold it together. “How long.”

“Just for tonight. I'll be back tomorrow.” Mickey replies straightening up.

“And it's for work?” Ian asks to confirm.

Mickey gives him a small sweet smile. “Yes Ian, I'm not going on this trip with some secret lover.” Ian exhales audibly in relief, making Mickey walk towards him. The brunette touches his left cheek and looks him in the eye. “I'm not your boyfriend Ian, we are not dating.”

“I know that.” Ian mumbles.

“I mean, by now it's clear that…”

Ian interrupts him when he presses his lips against Mickey's full ones. Mickey freezes for a second and Ian's heart hammers in his chest at the possibility that he might not respond. But soon there's a hand on the back of his neck and Mickey is pulling Ian's bottom lip into his mouth. Ian moans and isn’t afraid to show the bad boy just how desperate he is for his lips.

Mickey bites hard on Ian's lips and he gasps in surprise. The brunette takes the opportunity to put his tongue in Ian's mouth. The latter sucks greedily like that’s all he's been waiting for. Craving for. Ian moans when their tongues touch and as the kiss deepens. When he grabs Mickey's waist however, the shorter man pulls back. Ian's breath stutters and he touches his lips.

“Fuck!” Mickey shouts. “You gotta stop doing that.” He says even though seconds ago he was lost in the kiss just as much as Ian. “It's obvious that I can't fucking resist you Ian. So me not wanting to date you is not because I'm not attracted to you.” Ian smiles. “Stop that.” Mickey chastises. “I'm not a good guy Ian. And you are. How can you not see how wrong we are for each other?”

“We’re not.” Ian insists, taking a step towards Mickey.

“Stop.”

“I think we’re perfect for each other.” Ian ignores him and keeps walking till they're face to face again. “You don’t see it Mick, but I do.” Ian whispers.

Mickey shakes his head. “How is it that you're so shy one minute and the next you can't stop stealing kisses?”

Ian blushes and he has to duck his head. Mickey chuckles and holds up his chin so Ian is looking at him again. “I know what I want.” Ian says it so quietly he hopes Mickey hears it. “And I want you.”

Mickey exhales a shuddering breath before stepping back completely. “I have to go.” he picks up his bag. “You’ll help us move on Saturday, right?”

“Wouldn’t miss it.” Ian says taking a seat on Mickey's bed.

Mickey gives him a short smile before walking out and closing the bedroom door behind him. Ian sighs sadly and lays on the bed, his head on Mickey's pillow. He pulls out his phone and goes to his gallery, tapping on the picture he took of a sleeping Mickey two days ago. Ever since the day he got into Mickey's bed he's been doing the same every night he's around so it was easy to creepily take Mickey's photo.

“You may not love me now but you will, soon.” He says right before kissing the screen.

He then settles better on Mickey's pillow and shuts his eyes.

 

                                   ▲●▲●▲●▲

 

The apartment is beautiful. The living room is massive and the kitchen is separated just by a counter. It's a three bed roomed one and two of the rooms, the bathrooms are ensuit. It's so fucking dreamy Ian doesn’t think he’ll ever leave. The double doors leading to the balcony are made of glass and since they're on the eighth floor, there's a perfect view of the park. It's amazing and Ian wants to stand and stare all day.

The place is even more beautiful once they’ve arranged everything and placed every piece of furniture where it belongs. He's still looking at the view when someone joins him. He doesn’t need to look to know it's Mickey, he can tell from his perfume alone.

“Nice, huh?” Mickey says as he lights a cigarette.

“Amazing.” Ian agrees.

Mickey grins and steps forward so they're standing side by side. “Did you check out the third bedroom?”

“The guest room? Yeah. Really nice bed. Comfy.” Ian replies. He tries to smile but he doesn’t quite get there. Now he has no reason to share a bed with Mickey. And even though the bad boy repeats it all the time, getting a third bedroom just so Ian doesn’t crawl into his bed definitely drives the message home. Mickey is trying to push him away and it hurts like a motherfucker. He sniffs and leans on the rail so Mickey can't see his teary eyes.

“Something’s wrong.” Mickey says.

“No I'ts not.” Ian sniffs again.

“Ian, if you don’t like something about the room it can be changed.”

“Why would you change anything about the guest room because of me?”

“It's not the guest room idiot, it's _your_ room.” Ian straightens up to look at Mickey. “I figured, you're always here anyway why not just move in?” he blows out the smoke watching Ian with narrowed eyes. “You okay Gallagher?”

Before, Ian wanted to cry because he thought Mickey got a guest room so he would stop sleeping with him. But the tears fall because Mickey put him in consideration when looking for an apartment. He wanted his opinion on the couches and now he got Ian his own room. His heart swells and he feels so touched he starts sobbing.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Ian what did I say?” Mickey steps forward and takes him into his arms. “Ian. I'm sorry, whatever I said to hurt you, I take it back.” He rubs Ian's back and pulls him tighter. Ian cries harder and holds onto Mickey like he's his lifeline.

Together with feeling touched comes the realization that Mickey _cares_. Mickey cares about him. He may not be able to see it because he doesn’t care often but he cares about Ian. And Ian cries some more in Mickey's arms, because this just became the happiest day of his life.

 


	8. Chapter 8

“I got you your own bedroom for a reason.”

“I know that.” Ian replies crawling into Mickey's even bigger bed that night.

“So what are you doing here?”

“You got a bigger bed.” Ian points out instead.

“Which had nothing to do with you.”

“If you say so.”

“Ian.” Mickey starts.

“It's cold. I'm cold.” Ian whines. “The bed is cold, the new sheets smell… new. _And_ they're also cold. This made more sense.”

“You're relentless.” Mickey says quietly, a soft smile playing on his lips.

“And you're stubborn.”

“I'm not stubborn I'm realistic.” Mickey shifts so he's sleeping on his back. It seems Ian is gearing up for a conversation so it's not like he's getting any sleep now.

“There's nothing realistic about denying yourself something you want.” Ian reiterates confidently.

Mickey chuckles in the dark. “If I switch on this lamp right now, will you be this confident?”

Ian knows he won't. “Don’t.”

“But I need you to stop.” Mickey says so softly Ian almost misses it.

“Why?” Ian asks scooting closer. “I don’ get it. You like me. You're attracted to me. You are nice to me so you clearly care about me. What's stopping you?” Ian starts to caress Mickey from his leg up to his thigh.

“Stop.”

“You're not wearing any underwear.” Ian points out.

“I always sleep naked.”

“No you don’t.”

“Yeah well, _shit Ian stop_. I thought you were gonna sleep in your room. So I slept naked.” He hisses once Ian starts to massage his soft dick. “Ian.” He whispers.

“You want me.” Ian licks his lips. “I'm here why won't you have me?”

“Fuck.” Mickey moans fully hard now. “Ian stop.” He says even though he's bucking his hips and thrusting into Ian's hand.

“You sure you want me to stop?” Ian speeds up. Without pausing on the hand job, he settles between Mickey's legs. “You want it Mick.” He whispers in the brunette’s ear. “You want _me_.”

With that he reaches towards the night stand with his free hand and pulls open the drawer. He gropes around till he touches what could be the lube. Pulling it out, he lets go of Mickey, puts some in his hand, warms it up then goes back to jerking the bad boy off.

“Yes.” Mickey moans before grabbing Ian and pulling in for a deep searing kiss. “Keep doing that.” He moans.

“Wasn’t planning on stopping.” Ian replies before initiating the kiss again.

He licks around Mickey's lips then kisses him fervently again. Mickey keeps hissing and cursing as Ian keeps jerking him expertly. He rubs his thumb against the slit before concentrating on the tip. It has Mickey calling out his name so he does it again, and again. While Mickey is lost in the pleasure, Ian takes of his boxers with his other arm and squirts some lube on his asshole. He hisses from the cold temperature but immediately starts fingering himself.

“Shit Ian, gonna come.” Mickey cries out. Ian can't have that. So he starts to jerk Mickey off in a comically slow pace. “Fucker.” Mickey laughs which turns into a moan when Ian squeezes the head a little bit.

Once he feels he's ready to go he holds onto Mickey's shoulder with one hand and Mickey’s dick with the other as he straddles the brunette's lap and sits on him. Mickey's cock gets inside him in one slow swoop.

“Shit Ian! What are you… you can't… I'm not wearing any…”  


“Shh…” Ian places a finger on Mickey's lips to quiet him down. “It's okay.” he whispers against his lips as he starts rocking back and forth slowly, gently. “It's alright Mickey.” he repeats.

“Ian.” Mickey moans when Ian picks up the pace on the rocking.

Fuck Mickey feels _good_. Mickey feels better than good. He feels fucking amazing. Ian wants _more_. So he plants his legs on either side of Mickey's thighs, grabs the headboard behind Mickey, and just starts fucking himself up and down on the thick, long dick inside of him.

“Aaaah!” he shouts feeling fuller than he ever has before. “So. Fucking. Good! Yes!” he shouts. It feels amazing to have someone inside him after all this time. Feels fucking amazing to have _Mickey_ inside him.

Ian lets go of the board and wraps both hands around Mickey's neck before biting on his neck. “Shit Ian. Fuck.” Mickey grabs both his ass cheeks as Ian continues to ride him at a punishing pace. “So fucking tight. So good.” He continues.

“Always gonna be good for you Mick.” Ian says, his voice deep and wrecked making Mickey curse and come inside him.

Feeling Mickey's cum coat him spurs him on and he moans “touch me” in Mickey's ear. As soon as a warm soft hand is on his throbbing dick, Ian comes harder than he ever has between them. He shudders a few times after and doesn’t let go of Mickey until he's completely done.

Ian pulls away to leave a peck on Mickey's full lips. “That was fucking hot Ian.”  Mickey says looking surprised. “I will never fucking judge a book by its cover ever again.” Ian laughs and hides his face in Mickey's neck. “Seriously?” Mickey chuckles. “You just rocked my world, literally and now you wanna be fucking shy? What the fuck?”

Ian slaps his chest playfully. “Fuck off.”

Mickey caresses his back softly. “Seriously though, that was hot.”

“Told you we’d be perfect together.”

“Mmm.” Mickey hums. “You are a bad, bad, boy Ian Gallagher.”

Ian laughs again before kissing Mickey to hide his blush. He can feel Mickey smiling even as they kiss. Can feel Mickey's hands on his ass and back. Can feel the affection he feels for this man on the daily intensify the more Mickey continues to kiss him. He can feel the soft dick inside him convulse the more they kiss. Soon Mickey is hard again which in turn has Ian's own dick standing at attention.

“You ready to go again, or did I wear you out?” Ian teases.

“Ha ha.” Mickey pecks him once. “My turn.” He grabs onto Ian's waist and switches their positions so Ian is on his back. Ian yelps from the sudden action but it turns into a loud moan with the first thrust. Mickey starts moving inside him, unknowingly sending jolts of electricity and pleasure inside Ian's body.

This is what Ian has wanted for the longest time. And now he has it. Mickey is his, this seals the deal. Mickey is his now, and he is Mickey's.  

And Ian plans on making sure it stays that way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slow burn? where? tihihihihihihihi


	9. Chapter 9

Ian blinks his eyes open to find Mickey watching him and pushing his hair back gently. He smiles and gives Mickey a dry peck. “Morning.” Ian whispers before covering his mouth. “Morning breath.” He mumbles.

Mickey laughs pulling his hand away. “That’s not the issue here puppy.”

Ian's face forms a tiny frown. “There’s an issue?” Mickey nods. “What?”

“What do you want Ian?”

“I already told you,” Ian starts to draw patterns on Mickey's chest to avoid looking at him. “You.” he says quietly.

“Meaning you want me to be your boyfriend.” Ian nods. “Never had one of those before.” Mickey chuckles lightly making Ian smile up and him and tangle their legs together.

“There’s always a first time for everything.” Ian encourages.

“Why?”

“Because we all need to try new things? I don’t know.” Ian shrugs.

Mickey laughs. “Why do you want to be my boyfriend?”

“Because I lov… like you. Because I really like you.”

Mickey sighs and sits up so he can lean against the headboard. Ian takes the opportunity to lay his head on Mickey's lap and the latter automatically starts to caress his hair.  “What if I turn out to be a terrible boyfriend? What if I end up hurting you?” Mickey asks. “I don wanna hurt you, Ian.”

“You won't.”

“See, you can't know that.” Mickey said his voice hard. “What if I end up fucking cheating on you or some shit just as bad?”

Ian sits up. He sits on Mickey's lap like he did last night and clasps both his cheeks. “Then don’t.”

“I don’t know if I can promise that.” He says gently caressing Ian's thigh. The redhead swallows and nods. He wants Mickey. He wants Mickey any way he can have him. So at this point he honestly doesn’t care.

“It's okay.” Mickey frowns at him. “It is. You…” Ian clears his throat. “I know who you are. And all you need is…” he licks his lips as Mickey intently listens to him. “all you need to do is learn. So you will cheat until you can’t anymore. You will cheat until you can control yourself, until you can be able to stop yourself. And…and, and I'll wait.” Ian shakes his head as his own words sting painfully. “I'll wait Mick. Just please don’t… please don’t push me away.” He kisses Mickey hard. “Don’t.”

Mickey nods his eyes a little teary. “You're sure about this?”

Ian nods yes and continues to kiss him. Yes he's sure. He's _been_ sure. For ages he's been sure. So he doesn’t care. He wants this.

 

**°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

That evening Mickey takes Ian on their first date. They get in Mickey's car and he drives them to the park. Ian didn’t know on Sundays people watched movies at the park. There's a projector after dark and people seat around with blankets and snacks. Mickey brings Ian a chicken burger and his own beef one. He then also unpacks a six pac of canned beer.

This gesture is so small and simple but it makes Ian's heart swell and takes his breath away. Mickey can be thoughtful when he wants to be. He knows for a fact no guy has ever gotten such treatment before and it just makes him exceedingly happy.

They seat at the very back and dig into their food. Truth be told though, Ian spends the entire time watching Mickey instead of the movie and falling more and more in love. The night is surprisingly warm and they don’t really need to cover themselves with the second blanket they brought but Ian does it anyway just so he can give Mickey a hand job.

.

“I take it I did good?” Mickey asks on the drive home.

Ian laughs looking out the window. “It was alright.” He says casually.

“Fuck off I did alright. I did great, otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten that fucking hand job.” Ian laughs louder.

“You’re one cocky fucker, you know that?” Ian says looking at the side of Mickey's face since he's focused on the road.

“Been told that once or twice.” Mickey gives him a fond glance and it makes Ian blush so of course it's Mickey's turn to laugh.

They drive for a while in silence. Ian caresses Mickey's right hand that’s not on the wheel and Mickey turns over his hand so Ian slots their fingers together. “Thank you.” he whispers.

Mickey gives him that sweet, soft smile again.

 

**°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

“So you two are married now?” Mandy jokes as they watch a movie where they're seated together on their new seats. “Good job on the chairs by the way, fucking love them.” She says before adjusting the volume. “So?”

Ian sighs. “He agreed to be my boyfriend. But I'm not so sure because he technically didn’t confirm it.”

“But you talked about it.”

“Yeah.”

“You really think he's not gonna cheat on you? Because you were here when that guy… Reggie was crying over Mickey hooking up with Vince.”

“I remember.” He wishes he could forget.

“So you seriously don’t care as long you get to be with him either way?”  Ian doesn’t say anything which of course Mandy takes as consent. “Oh Ian.” Mandy says and he doesn’t like the pity in her voice.

“Don’t do that. Don’t feel sorry for me. There's nothing to feel sorry for.” He pushes her away and goes to his room.

“Ian, come back I'm sorry!”

He hears Mandy shout but he just bangs the door. And walks towards his bed dropping face first. He yells into his pillow.

It's not a good idea. It was never a good idea to date Mickey. Not when he wouldn’t know what fidelity is if it hit him in the face. But what's Ian to do? What's he to do when he's pretty sure that Mickey is the love of his life? How is he supposed to live without him when he feels the other man is the air he breathes?

He's not letting him go. Not now not ever. He will just have to deal with whatever gets thrown his way. If or when Mickey cheats –if it can even be called that since they haven’t really defined their relationship- he will swallow down the pain. He will deal with it. Either way he's not letting Mickey go. As much as it’ll hurt. As much as Ian might cry, he is not letting go.

He's not letting Mickey go.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ian is still taller (can't picture him otherwise) but he's smaller than Mickey. You know, coz Mickey is bulked up and shit. Kinda like he looks now for his new mini series _The Long Road Home_ *moans* shit i wanna be Layla rn!!  
>  *clears throat* anyhu,  
> sorry for delay!!

Mickey wraps his hands around Ian's slender hips as he thrusts inside him from behind. He wraps one of his hands around Ian's chest before increasing his pace. Ian hisses loudly both hands on the glass door. “Mickey.”

“Shit.” Mickey peppers light kisses on Ian's back making Ian even more turned on than he already is.

Suddenly Mickey pulls out, turns Ian around, hikes up his left thigh then penetrates him again in a span of seconds. Ian thinks he can see why all these men are after him. He's fucking amazing in the sex department. Ian’s ass hits the glass door with every hard thrust, Mickey's grip on hips even tighter now. Ian can already feel the bruises forming. The brunette stills and rotates his hips rubbing relentlessly on Ian's prostate.

“Miiiiiiickey, shit, shit, shit.” Ian's blunt nails dig into Mickey's shoulders, his eyes shut tightly.

Mickey chuckles before pulling out and pushing back in. Ian opens his eyes to find darkened eyes watching him. Mickey buries his head in Ian's neck and grabs his ass. His thrusting doesn’t stop and Ian is so overwhelmed by the pleasure he can feel tears falling down his cheeks. He can feel Mickey's teeth press against his skin and he tilts his head to give the other man better access to mark him up. Ian wants those teeth marks on him. Wants the evidence that ‘Mickey Milkovich was here’ on him.

Ian holds the back of Mickey's neck as the teeth sink deeper making him groan out loudly from the pain in his neck contradicting the pleasure he's receiving. He whimpers when Mickey changes his former angle but keeps up the pace. Shit, he wishes they could stay entwined like this forever. Mickey inside him and Ian holding him like he never wants to let him go. Which he doesn’t.

Mickey lifts his head and pulls Ian in for a rushed, frenzied kiss. His movements are suddenly fast and needy. Mickey's tale when he's about to come. The knowledge makes Ian want to come but he holds out until he hears warm cum coat his insides. Mickey even though spent, keeps thrusting and Ian doesn’t even need hands on him as he climaxes between them.

Mickey pulls out and they slide down the carpet together.

“We need to get up.” Ian says still out of breath. “Mandy is coming home any time now.”

“Can't.” Mickey licks his lips. “move.” He finishes making Ian laugh.

 

**°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

It’s been a month and three days since Ian told Mickey what he wanted. A month and three days since they’ve been at it. Whatever this was. And Ian, well Ian has never been happier. And he's not just saying that, like he legitimately can't remember the last time he was this freaking happy.

But,

But he still needed to know where their relationship stands. Sure Mickey hasn’t fucked anyone else apart from Ian. He says he hasn’t and Ian believes him. The sex is amazing, they spend every night together and Mickey is just as sweet as he's always been. And Ian may be ecstatic about their situation, but at the end of the day he still needs their relationship defined. Because Ian is… well, this is who he is. And this doesn’t make him the coolest, he's aware and he hopes Mickey's doesn’t get mad when he brings it up. Because he _needs to know._

He already knows Mickey has feelings for him, that’s not the problem.  But are they feelings of liking him and only that? Is it lust? Is it love? There is a squirming doubt in Ian's mind that maybe he loves Mickey more that the brunette loves him. And every time he panics at the thought.

He doesn’t want to rush things, doesn’t want to speed things along, but he needs to know where they stand. Things are going so well and the last thing Ian wants is to ruin that but he needs to know or he won't be at peace. It's all about getting the courage to speak up though, and that isn’t exactly his strong suit.

But Ian needs closure. And he wants it more than anything.

This is why his leg can’t stop shaking under the table as the three of them have dinner that evening. Ian is fucking hungry due to the work out Mickey gave him against the balcony doors but he is too nervous to eat. He keeps picking on his plate with his fork and he hopes none of the siblings notice.

No such luck though. “Food’s getting cold.” Mandy points out the same time Mickey states, “You’re not eating.”

Under the scrutiny and concern Ian takes a small bite and moans in a show of proving that he's eating. Mandy gets a phone call and she lifts her plate taking it with her to her room so it's just him and Mickey left.

“What's wrong?” Mickey asks. “You wanted take out? I know with a chef in the house…”

Ian adamantly shakes his head. “No, food’s great.” Mandy's cooking is the best.

“So what's the matter?” Mickey pushes his plate away and wipes his mouth with the napkin. He completely focuses his attention on Ian making the redhead even more nervous. His palms get sweaty, his hands shake a little and he hates that he still gets nervous around Mickey. “Ian, we are…” Mickey trails off as if he’s thinking. “what we are. No need to be scared anymore.”

Ian nods. “Ye...yeah.” he stammers making Mickey's frown deepen.

“Shit.” The bad boy gets up and gestures for Ian to stand up too. He takes Ian's hand and leads him towards the balcony. The memory of what took place here hours ago makes Ian smile and some of the nervous energy leaves him. Mickey stands him in front of the rails and gets behind him. Ian faces the dark beautiful street in front of him being lit by the many street lights. “Take a deep breath.” Ian does as told. “Again.” Mickey orders as he continues to rub his arms up and down. Ian finds himself relaxing and he pushes back on the firm chest behind him. “You good?”

Ian nods turning in Mickey's arms. “You're so sweet sometimes I think you got MPD.”

Mickey chuckled. “Well, only my family gets to see this side of me.”

Ian steps closer to Mickey and plays with the strings dangling from his loose hoody t-shirt. “I'm your family?” he asks shyly.

“’Course.”

“What else am I to you?” Ian asks quietly still not looking at Mickey. He can feel Mickey's thumbs caressing his sides so he knows his- whatever they are- is not about to freak out.

“What do you want to be?” Mickey asks.

“You know.”

Mickey takes a deep breath of his own before raising one hand to touch Ian's chin and tilt his head up so they're staring into each other’s eyes. “Okay puppy. You're my boyfriend.”


	11. Chapter 11

“So today I’m in class right?”

“Right.”

“And this guy doesn’t turn in his assignment. And when the lecturer asks for it, he tells her to fuck off. Like right there in front of the entire fucking class!” Ian exclaims scandalously. They're seated in bed facing each other while chewing on popcorn. They’d been watching a movie in Mickey's room but Ian was updating his boyfriend. Shit he loved that. _Boyfriend_. He was updating Mickey on his day. The brunette was listening intently too making the redhead feel all gooey inside. “Like, there are already rumors going around that they're fucking. But this totally proves it, right?”

Mickey nods in agreement before swallowing. “Yeah. They're definitely fucking.”

“Exactly!” Ian exclaims so excited at the notion. “Oh! And get this, they slipped up once, and some people caught her blowing him _in her car_.” He whispers that last part even though it doesn’t really matter. Mickey shakes his head. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing ever happens in school. So a little gossip helps move the boring hours along.”

“No, I get that.”

Ian grins making Mickey laugh. “And then yesterday there was this wild party. I didn’t go, of course since I was, you know, right here on this bed riding you.” Mickey laughs louder. “But from the photos on Facebook, it was _mad_. Can't wait to find out who did what when I get back.”

Mickey lies back on the bed hands behind his neck. Ian is looking at the soft dick that drives him wild when Mickey speaks. “You know, I miss the days when I used to make you nervous and you couldn’t say more than two words.” Ian blushes. “Now you can't stop yapping to save your life.” Mickey finishes with a laugh when Ian throws a pillow at him.

“Shut up you like when I talk.”

“I do.” Mickey agrees with a soft smile. “C’mere.” He stretches out his hand and Ian eagerly crawls towards the welcoming hold. The popcorn spills but he doesn’t care about that right now. “I’m just happy you’re happy puppy.” Ian snuggles in the warm hold, relishing in the touching of their skin.

_I love you._

Ian thinks, not for the first time. But he doesn’t say it. Things are perfect and the bad boy would freak for sure. So he reins it in.

**°°°°°°°°°°°**

Mickey needs a new pair of shoes. It's on a Sunday so they leave the house to go shopping. They visit three malls because Mickey can't seem to make up his mind. By the time Ian's stomach is growling hungrily Mickey has made a decision, thank God. He however also gets Ian a pair and they enter the first restaurant they see after leaving the mall.

Ian insists Mickey catch him up on his job. He listens to his boyfriend talk, losing himself in Mickey's voice. He could listen to him talk about nothing and everything all fucking day. He is so gone on the bad boy it's not even funny. After, they order cocktails and Ian thinks they need to go on more dates. He really likes this.

Mickey stands up abruptly.  “Gotta go pee. Be right back, a’ight?”

Ian nods and sips on his drink. Mickey bends and gives him a quick kiss on the cheek making Ian blush hard, even though taken by surprise. He looks after Mickey until he's disappeared in a corner before turning back to his drink. He gasps when a flash of white seats across from him.

“So you’re the reason Mick won't fuck anyone from work anymore.”

“Vince.” Ian spits out the name with a grimace.

Vince tilts his head and blatantly inspects Ian. “So he not only kisses you, but he takes you out on dates and is actually _faithful_ to you?”

Ian seals his lips tight but gives him the chin. Not backing down.

“Wh…what,” Vince stammers out. “there is nothing special about you. With your freckles and your shouting ginger hair, and you’re _skinny_. Where are your muscles?” Vince says. “I mean look at me! And he left me for you? He's turning down all these hot guys _for you?_ It makes no fucking sense. Unless,”

Ian looks at Vince. He’s feeling very intimidated by the man’s words and he wants to know what this _unless_ is.  He’s also curious as to what Mickey sees in him. He called him beautiful once though, and the memory helps relieve some of the tension brought on by Vince’s intrusion.

“You’re shy. And if I didn’t resent you I'd want to hug you and ruffle your stupid hair… that’s the appeal, isn’t it? He wants something different.  Someone like you. Because let me tell you something red, you are not his type.”

“I know.” Ian mumbles to himself.

“This is just a phase I'm sure of it. He’ll get tired of you.” Vince says confidently making Ian swallow the lump in his throat. “You know it's just a matter of time before he dumps you, right?”

“He won't.”

“Oh you’re naïve. Mickey is a player. And once a player always a player. He’s played every guy he’s ever come across. And yeah, I stole him from Reggie, but it's not like it was that hard.”

“You're just bitter.”

“Of course I'm bitter. You’re getting to have everything I ever wanted from him but he never gave me.” Vince gets up. “Enjoy it while it lasts red. Soon you’ll be crying into your pillow like so many others before you.” he blows Ian a kiss and walks away.

Ian looks out the window and blinks back tears. At first he’d been so happy when Vince confirmed that Mickey is being faithful but what he said just now… Ian shakes his head. He refuses to believe he's only fooling himself. Mickey is different with him. Treats him differently, talks to him differently, loves him differently even though he doesn’t feel like that yet.

So no, Ian will not cry over some jealous asshole. He probably saw Mickey kiss him and decided to bring Ian down. And Ian hates it so much that he succeeded. He's let Vince and his words get to him. And now his chest aches and his throat hurts from trying not to cry. He swallows and takes another cold sip of his drink.

Mickey is his now.

Cares about him and is always there for him. He  is happy.

Ian is so fucking happy. And he won't let that  get taken away from him.

He feels a hand on his shoulder and he smiles softly. “I'm sorry I took so long. My boss is also eating here and she stopped me for a fucking chat.” Mickey explains taking his seat. Ian nods in reply. “You okay?” Mickey asks.

Ian pushes away his drink. “Yeah.” he sits up and masters the biggest smile he can. “But I wanna go home now if that’s okay?”

“Yeah, of course.” Mickey nods right before calling for their server and asking for the check. “You’re sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah.” Ian reassures more convincingly. “I just really want to lie down.”

“Okay.” Mickey reaches across the table and squeezes his hand.

The touch sends shocks across his arm then up and down Ian's body. He closes his eyes and relishes in the feeling.

_I love you._

Is just in the tip of his tongue. But Ian manages to rein it in, like he always does.

 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my job just got from part time to full time so will try to update twice today since i don know if i'll be able to do it as often.  
> enjoy!

Ian leans against Mickey's bedroom door in only a t-shirt and boxers watching his boyfriend pack. Mickey is in a suit today and even though Ian prefers the casual jeans and the leather jacket he has to admit Mickey's looking delicious now too. He always looks good.

“Okay.” Mickey straightens up after he's done closing up his suitcase. “I'll only be gone for four days.” Ian nods. Mickey walks towards him and grabs him by the waist. “Will miss you.” he whispers with a soft smile.

Ian unfolds his hands to wrap them around Mickey's neck. “Be safe.” He says trying to sound enthusiastic.

Mickey bites on his bottom lip and regards him carefully. “What's up?”

Ian shakes his head ‘no’. “M’good.”

“Stop lying to me, please.” Ian diverts his eyes. “I would say it's because I'm leaving but they only just called. And you’ve been weird since lunch yesterday. So come on Ian, what's going on?”

Ian pulls away to walk towards the bed. He drops at the edge of it and leans on the shut suitcase. “I just… sometimes I wonder why you’re with me is all.”

“What do you mean?” Mickey asks with a frown.

Ian sighs. “Are you with me because I was persistent?”

Mickey folds his arms and stands legs apart his expression unreadable. “Where is this coming from?”

“Nowhere. I'm just… I'm curious alright? I'm not your type. We both know that.” He finishes gesturing at himself.

The next thing Ian knows Mickey is kneeling between his legs. He takes Ian's hands in his and blinks up at him. “I didn’t…” he licks the corner of his lips as if searching for the right words. “Those guys before you, I wasn’t with them because they're _my type_. I fucked them because they couldn’t stop throwing themselves at me. Practically begged for it.” Ian swallows hard, his eyes glistening. He feels Mickey squeeze his hands. “Ian…”

“That’s the same thing I did. Is that why you're with me?”

“No!” Mickey says adamantly. “I'm with you because I actually fucking like you.” he starts. “I'm sorry I have never told you this but I… I was attracted to you, before. It wasn’t just you.”

“Really?” Ian asks his voice small.

“Yes really.” Mickey grins making Ian laugh, his vision blurry. “C’mere.” He pulls him down so they're both on the carpeted floor. The brunette lets go of his hands to wipe his unshed tears. He presses his thumbs to Ian's eyes and shushes him. “You are nothing like them. You Ian, are my type. You hear me?”Ian nods. “So stop. We are together now so no need to worry about those other fucks.” Ian nods again and laughs in relief. He presses their lips together and Mickey kisses back eagerly. “What brought this on?”

“What?” Ian asks confused. He was starting to lose himself in the kiss.

“We’ve been together a while now, this has never been an issue so where did it come from?” Ian chews on his bottom lip and his behavior is shifty enough to make Mickey look at him suspiciously. “Ian.”

“I just… the other day at the restaurant Vince stopped by the table and said a bunch of stuff.” He shrugs trying not to delve too much into what happened. He's not some defenseless pussy running to his boyfriend.

Mickey's frown gets deeper. “At the restaurant?”

“Yeah, when you went to the bathroom?”

“What did he say?”

Ian stares at Mickey. It’s been a while since he heard him sound like that. Angry, dangerous. It makes his heart beat accelerate and his dick hard. “It's not important.”

“I'm not fucking joking Ian. What did he fucking say?”

Mickey growls and Ian can't take it anymore. “Shit.” He curses before surging forward.

Mickey's eyes widen is surprise but he soon melts into the kiss being fervently planted on him. Ian moans already so hard as he reaches for Mickey's button and zip. He pushes his boyfriend roughly so he's lying on his back. “Ian what the fuck has gotten into you?” Mickey asks breathlessly clearly turned on by Ian's neediness. Ian doesn’t bother replying. To turned on to reply. He's just glad they fucked an hour ago before Mickey went to shower. He thinks as he takes his boxers off. “Ian I'm going to be late.”

“Shut up.” Ian commands pulling out his boyfriend’s throbbing cock and sitting on it.

“Yes sir.” Mickey replies with a loud groan, thrusting up and meeting him halfway.

“Yes!” Ian cries out once fully seated.  He takes off his t-shirt so he's now completely naked riding his fully clothed hot boyfriend. He hisses and rides Mickey harder. The carpet burn with suck later but he can't think about that right now. No, not right now. He slows down and rides Mickey in circles. The latter calls out his name and shuts his eyes  tightly, blunt nails digging into Ian's thighs. “Mick, fuck, Mick.” He moans his ministrations rushed. He's driving Mickey wild below him and he relishes in that.

Ian bends and kisses Mickey hard as he continues to pleasure them both. He pulls back to sniff and kiss on his boyfriend’s neck. He loves losing himself in everything Mickey. His scent, his heartbeat, his moans. He sits back up and watches as Mickey falls apart under him and it makes him smirk cockily.

“Fuck you.” Mickey notices. “You close? I'm coming.”  He lifts his lips and doesn’t drop back down. His dick is right by Ian's prostate now and it elicits a loud moan from Ian as he keens from the pleasure. “Kiss me.” He drops his hips and pulls Ian down for a desperate hungry kiss bringing them to the edge simultaneously.

“You came all over my clean ironed clothes fucker.” Mickey says still out of breath. “You're ironing new ones.”

Ian laughs. “I don’ mind.”

 

**°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

Mickey drives to work with a huge smile on his face which is totally and completely out of character for him. he is sated and happy. two things that only Ian does to him. the redhead never ceases to amaze him. One minute he is this shy blushing mess, the next he's taking charge and riding him like there's no tomorrow. He has never been with someone like Ian, and that’s what intrigues him the most about his innocent boyfriend. It's what makes it so easy not to cheat on him. The guys around him haven’t stopped coming onto him and even though his is sometimes tempted, he thinks about what's waiting for him at home and it makes it easier to say no.

Because there's no one better than Ian at the end of day. This other men are all sex, sex, sex, but Ian, Ian is so much more than that. Sex with Ian –which is fucking insane- is just a bonus of their relationship. There is so much more. _He_ is so much more.

Which is why the moment he gets to work he's teaching Vince one heck of a lesson. When he parks and walks into his office building, his smile deteriorates as soon as his eyes land on Vince seated comfortably in his cubicle. Mickey walks towards the idiot. He bangs a fist on Vince’s desk and the guy startles.

“My office. _Now_.” He commands before getting back in the elevator and heading to his office in the third floor.

He hasn’t sat down for a second before there's a hesitant knock on his door. He doesn’t answer but Vince walks in anyway.

“Don’t sit.” He spits and Vince steps back from the chair.

“Mickey I'm sorry. I just wanted to scare him.”

“It's Mr. Milkovich to you from now on.” Vince swallows. “You knew the kind of person Ian is and you must have felt real fucking great that you succeeded in your intimidation. But here's the thing,” Mickey thumbs his nose. “You ever, come near Ian again, it's been a while but I'm sure as hell gonna enjoy using my fists again.”

“Mick he's no one. You can't just drop me like this. Over _him_.”

Mickey chuckles dangerously and gets up. “The him, you're referring to so condescendingly, is _my_ fucking boyfriend. Disrespect him again, I dare you.”  They're now face to face.

“It's not fair.” Vince mutters his eyes on the floor.

“Neither is life. You were nothing to me. Just some warm fucking mouth like every guy before you. So you Vince, are the nothing in this equation. Don’t get it twisted.”

Vince stares at him. He's about to say something when Mickey punches him in the stomach. The other man bends over, trying to catch his breath.

 Mickey holds onto his shoulder nonchalantly before repeating in a whisper, “You. Are. Nothing.” Vince nods before standing back up. “Now fuck off before I change my mind and fuck you up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> will try my best to keep the updates coming!  
> thanx for readin!!


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mention of vomiting.

It's Ian's birthday.

"Happy birthday puppy." Ian giggles when Mickey nuzzles his face in his neck that morning.

He doesn’t know what Mickey has planned but he is super excited. Honestly Ian doesn’t care what they do as long as Mickey is by his side. He may be big on birthdays, but he hadn’t planned on telling Mickey about it. Turns out Mandy took care of that ages ago and Mickey had it marked or some cheesy shit like that. Mickey Milkovich and cheesy on one sentence is not something Ian ever saw coming.

To start off the day, Mickey takes Ian to the movies. They sit in the very back and make out for the entirety of it like teenagers. Ian also gets a blow job out of it so he doesn’t complain. Mickey then takes him to lunch in the four star hotel where they’ll be spending the night. Ian simply cannot wait. He hears the beds at any expensive hotel are comfortable as fuck so he can't wait to be plowed on one of those.

After lunch they go to the grand opening of some club. The owner is the sister to Mickey's boss and they're invited. It's an open bar so Ian doesn’t hold back seeing as it's his birthday. He spends the afternoon and most of the night by Mickey's side. Mostly because Mickey won't leave him on his own. “I'm watching over you. It's my fucking job.” Is the reply he gets every time he complains that he's not a child.

Ian dances and laughs then dances some more. Mickey refuses to dance but he agrees to stand with him on the dance floor. The D.J publicly wishes him a happy birthday, and plays that birthday song where people are spending their money and living their fantasy. Ian loves that song. After, a huge cake is produced with his face on it and Ian can't stop laughing.  

Mandy shows up after he cuts the cake n they spend the rest of the night doing shots.

All in all it's a really good birthday.

Debbie and Carl texted him, then Ian spent it with the man he loves and he had fun.

By 11:00PM that night Mickey hails a cab and they head back to the hotel. “Why did we leave so early?” Ian asks as they walk into the lobby.

Mickey tightens his hand around Ian's waist. “Because _someone_ is too drunk to keep partying.”

“I'm not too drunk. I'm the right amount of drunk.” Ian says even as he staggers making Mickey laugh.

They grab their key from the receptionist and head up to their room. The room is big and spacious but Ian only sees the massive bed with white sheets calling out to him. He pulls himself from Mickey's hold and dives in. He bounces a few times and he finds himself giggling.

.

Mickey watches as Ian continues to lie on the bed and only realizes his boyfriend has fallen asleep when he hears light snoring. “Jesus Christ.” He laughs before walking towards the bed.

He takes off Ian's shoes before turning him over so he can undress him. Mickey can't help the smile plastered on his face the entire time. It had been nice seeing Ian let loose like that. He had been giddy all day. Had been happy and exicted for his birthday. When Mickey found out from Mandy the date of Ian's birthday, he hadn’t known what to do for him. But he had then decided he would just do the things Ian likes, but would go all out. He wasn’t sparing any change for the next two days.

This weekend was all things Ian and what the redhead wanted, he was going to get.

Mickey has never gone out of his way to make a person who wasn’t a family member this fucking happy. But he found that with Ian it was easy and all worth it. The whole day Ian had been looking at him with adoration that scared and excited Mickey at the same time. On the one hand, it felt good to know his efforts were being appreciated and that he was doing good. That he was pleasing his boyfriend. On the other hand he was afraid that Ian might be falling in love with him and Mickey didn’t know how to deal with that.

He still didn’t trust himself with Ian. He cares about the redhead and wants to keep him happy but he still doesn’t trust that he won't hurt Ian at some point. And he will hate himself when he does. He realizes from day one he's always treated the redhead differently but he is not the nicest person and he is not used to being this committed to someone. So he is praying really hard that he doesn’t fuck up. Because Ian is too sweet and too good. He deserves a guy who will cherish him and care for him and be good to him. And God knows Mickey is trying to be all those things.

He leaves Ian in only his t-shirt and boxers before putting him under the covers and joining him. Tomorrow he's hoping they can stay in and enjoy every single thing this hotel has to offer. He wants Ian to have even more fun tomorrow than he did today.

 

  **°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

When Ian wakes up the next day it's noon. “Perfect timing.” Mickey says to him with a smile. He bends to kiss Ian and pulls back with a mock grimace. “Demn you smell like a brewery.”

Ian laughs. “Just for that,” he pulls Mickey down till he's lying on top of him and kisses him deeply.

“Breakfast is here. Take a quick shower then come join me in the balcony, yeah?”

“Take a shower?” Ian asks.“By myself? But it my birthday weekend Mick.” He pouts.

“I already showered.” Mickey replies with a laugh.

“I don’t care.”

Ian doesn’t expect  to be refused anything since it's his birthday which is why he's not surprised when he's being fucked against the shower wall and coming so hard his entire body trembles.

.

Ian stares at the breakfast options and wonders if they're supposed to finish all these food by themselves. It seems like there’s every type of food on their table. From pancakes to sausages, bacon, grapes, eggs, juice, milk, coffee, fruits. There is so much, Ian feels like he will burst by the end of it.

“How you feeling?” Mickey asks chewing on a piece of bacon.

“I'm fine. Not too bad.” Ian replies pouring himself a glass of juice. “Kinda don’t feel like going anywhere though. Do they have a pool?” Mickey nods. “Awesome.”

Ian watches as Mickey digs into a piece of cake and chew slowly as he scrolls through his phone.

“I loved my cake by the way.”

“Mandy made it.” Mickey says with a grin even though his eyes don’t leave his phone.

“No way, really?”

“Yep.” Mickey looks up. “She's been working on it for three days. Bitch treated me like a client. Didn’t even give me a fucking family discount.” Ian laughs as his boyfriend goes back to checking his mail.

Mickey is amazing. He's one of the best human beings Ian has ever met and he can't believe he's lucky enough to be dating him. He treats Ian so well sometimes it's hard not to shed tears of joy.

“I love you.” Ian spits suddenly. Mickey freezes mid chew and looks at Ian. The confession had certainly taken the redhead by surprise but he finds that he doesn’t regret it. “I love you Mickey.” he repeats. The brunette clears his throat. “You don’t have to say it back, I just wanted you to know that.” Ian reassures.

Mickey can feel his heart beating out of his chest. He can't believe he was right and now he's low key panicking. He slowly pushes his seat back and stands up. “I'm gonna go make a phone call.” Ian nods smiling up at him. “Happy birthday.” Ian's smile turns into a grin. Mickey smiles back before heading back inside and rushing into the bathroom.

He quickly kneels in front of the toilet and empties his stomach. He coughs a few times and stays there till he’s sure he won't puke again. He then gets up and heads towards the sink. Splashing some water on his face, he inspects himself on the mirror.

Shit.

He has a boyfriend.

Has had a boyfriend for months.

Said boyfriend loves him.

Suddenly it feels like too much responsibility. Responsibility that should maybe be given to someone else. Someone who's not Mickey. Mickey is an awful human being that does not deserve to be loved and Ian is making a huge mistake.


	14. Chapter 14

 Ian hears Mickey puking so they have to cut his birthday weekend short. Mickey says they shouldn’t but Ian insists he needs to go see a doctor. So he drops Ian home and does as the redhead suggests. But even though the weekend was cut short, Ian is still very ecstatic. He is still floating with happiness and high from being in love.

“So how was the rest of your birthday?” Mandy asks when she comes home that night.

“It was amazing Mands. I really do love him.”

“I'm happy for you Ian.”

“Thanks. Oh, and thank you so much for the cake. I loved the photo you used.”

Mandy laughs. “You're welcome baby.” She sips on her glass of water. “I have to say though, I did not expect Mickey to actually make this relationship work but he's proved me wrong.” She sighs. “I have never been happier to be wrong.” She adds making Ian laugh.

“I, never doubted him.” Ian says proudly.

“So where is he?”

“Well, since he wasn’t feeling very well,  I made him go see a doctor and when he came back he went straight to bed. I didn’t get a chance to ask him what the doctor said but it must not have been good. He was so quiet and low. Very un-Mickey like.” Ian offers.

“He’ll be fine.” Mandy says, sure. “So you had fun?”

“We drank too much, but yeah.”

“I know what you mean.” Mandy smiles. “Think I'm still feeling it.”

Ian chuckles, gets up and kisses her hair. “I'm gonna go to bed now. See you tomorrow?” she nods and he wishes her a goodnight before heading to Mickey's room.

He sheds his clothes and gets in bed beside Mickey. His boyfriend is sleeping but he might also be passed out judging from the smell of alcohol he's omitting. Ian must have missed how drunk he was when he came home. He finds it a little odd, but it's not really something to worry about. Even though he _is_ worried. Maybe the doctor gave him bad news that stressed him the fuck out. Ian just gets comfortable. He will ask about it tomorrow.

 

  **°°°°°°°°°°°**

 

On Monday Mickey doesn’t go to work. Ian saying I love you is  still fucking with his mind. So when Ian goes to school and when Mandy goes to work he spends the day in sweats just lazing around the house and trying not to drink as much as he’d drunk the night before. It's just three fucking words. Why are they bothering him so much? Ian loves him, that’s great. Mickey's cares greatly about him too. This is a good thing! He needs to get his shit together.

.

Mickey wakes up around 5:00PM to find out he must have nodded off at some point. He's walking towards the kitchen when there's a knock at the door. “Reggie?” he calls out loud as soon as he opens it. “The fuck are you doing here?”

“You never call in sick.” Reggie points out before letting himself in. “I brought you soup.”

Mickey frowns. “Reggie maybe you missed the fucking memo but I got a,”

“Boyfriend.” Reggie interrupts. “It's huge news Mickey. Everybody knows.”

“Then why the fuck are you here?”

“Because despite what happened, I don’t hate you.” Reggie explains.

“How did you know where I live?”

“I brought you soup.” Reggie says instead.

Mickey closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He keeps them closed as he rubs his forehead. When he opens them Reggie is right in front of him.

“Vince told me who you’re dating.” Reggie says softly. “That kid who's always hanging around?” he steps even closer. “You can't tell me he knows how to really take of you. Not like I used to.”

“Stop.” Mickey commands, meaning for it to be firm but it's barely above a whisper.

“Why?” Reggie asks. They're now face to face, chest to chest. Mickey tries to step back but he's against the counter. “Come on Mickey. Let me take care of you.” Reggie attacks his neck and starts kissing him at the same time he puts a hand inside Mickey's sweats.

Mickey's breath hitches and he repeats, “Stop.” He still doesn’t make any effort to push the guy off though, so he doesn’t stop. Mickey closes his eyes as Reggie strokes him to full hardness.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!”

Both men jump apart quickly.

“What the actual fuck?!” Mandy repeats. “GET THE FUCK OUT!” She yells at Reggie who follows the command immediately.

 _Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck._ Mickey chants internally. What did he almost do? What has he done?  

Ian.

.           .           .           .           .           .           .           .          

Ian gets out of the elevator and walks towards their door tiredly. Today’s attendance drained a lot out of him. He hopes Mickey's is home from work and that he's feeling better. He's missed his boyfriend.

_“GET THE FUCK OUT!”_

Is what greets him at the door. That’s Mandy's voice and she sounds extremely angry. The door is slightly open so Ian pushes it so it opens all the way. He's about to walk in when _Reggie_ opens the door, stares at him eyes wide, before rushing past him. That must have been who Mandy was yelling at. Why was she yelling at him? Why was he here?

“Really Mick? You're gonna cheat on Ian this fucking early? You haven’t even been dating six months! How could you?” Mandy shouts. She breathes hard then slaps Mickey so hard Ian flinches. “SAY SOMETHING!”

_You're gonna cheat on Ian this fucking early?_

_You're gonna cheat on Ian this fucking early?_

_You're gonna cheat on Ian this fucking early?_

_Cheat on Ian this fucking early?_

_Cheat on Ian_

_Cheat on Ian_

_Cheat on Ian_

Ian stands in place as those words resonate over and over and over again in his brain.

Reggie was here and Mickey just cheated on him with his ex. Or whatever Reggie was. “Ian.” Mickey calls finally noticing his presence. Both siblings turn to look at him. Mandy gasps in surprise and her expression turns apologetic.

Ian's heart starts breathing fast, really fast. He takes a deep breath trying to get his breathing back on track. Hurt. Pain. His chest aches so painfully he has to hold onto it. He drops his bag and starts backing away towards the door, just the way he came.

“Ian.” Mickey says his name. Or at least that’s what Ian thinks. He can't hear, his ears are ringing.

Tears start to fall and he turns around then, quickly rushing out the door. He can't use the elevator, doesn’t want Mickey catching up to him. Mickey. Mickey his boyfriend. Mickey who probably fucked Reggie. Ian rushes out of the apartment building and breaks into a run.

He runs, and runs, and runs without a destination in mind. He just needs to get as far away from the apartment building as possible.

It hurts.

Fuck, it hurts so fucking much. It's dark and he doesn’t know where the fuck he is by the time he stops. He bends over, hands on his knees and he sobs loudly. Cries like a fucking child. He's out of breath and there's a lump on his throat. He coughs and breathes as more and more tears cascade down his face.

Ian cries but it still doesn’t help. The pain doesn’t go away.

The ache caused by the betrayal, Mickey's betrayal, doesn’t dissipate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (ಥ_ಥ)


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a short journey. a short fic.  
> but Ela aka mixedemotions (thanx bby!) gave me an idea that tots works with this fic and we're heading towards that direction. was about to end this but guess we're gonna keep going. so......enjoy!!!

For a week Ian doesn't leave the house. He stays holed up in his room which he hogged as soon as his big brother moved out. He's surprised it's still his considering he moved out. He only gets up to pee and shower every two days. Sometimes Fiona will manage to get him to eat, but a lot of the times she's unsuccessful. Ian opts to not leave the house because everything reminds him of Mickey. 

He tried going to class once but he passed by the tree outside their house and remembered the day he forced Mickey to lean against one so he could take a photo of him. Ian had started missing Mickey, then he'd thought about why they weren't together and he'd immediately started crying. So he'd gone back to the house, undressed and gotten back to bed. He hasn't left since. 

Today is seems Fiona's had enough because she wont leave him alone. "You can't just lay in bed forever Ian." 

"I could try." He mumbles under the blankets. 

He feels the bed dip and a hand on his shoulder. "Come on sweet face, I know you're heartbroken but you gotta leave the bed sometime." She pleads caressing his hair. "Huh? Please." Silence. "At least come eat something." 

Ian just shrugs and covers his head.

Fiona sighs and gets up. "I know you're hurting, but you gotta go to school Ian. So today is the last day you're staying in bed." She says with finality and Ian hears the door close. 

He sighs deeply before sitting up. It's not like he hasn't been hurt before. He's been in one other relationship where the guy didn't care. And at the time Ian thought he'd hurt when they eventually drifted apart- since his ex didn't even care enough to break up with him- but this, what he was feeling now, was nothing compared to that. Knowing that Mickey had indeed fucked someone else just tore him apart inside. 

And with that thought Ian slides down and gets back under the covers. 

**+**

 

Sleep is just about to take over when Ian hears yelling.

“ _You_ ’re Mickey?!? You, are Mickey Milkovich?” the reply is inaudible so Ian only hears more of Fiona’s loud yelling. “He won't get out of bed because of you! Get the hell out of my house!”

“No.” Ian mumbles to himself before quickly shooting off the bed and running down the stairs.

“I just need to talk to him, apologise. Just fuckin… please.” Mickey pleads.

Hearing his voice again after days makes Ian's slow down a little bit. His eyes get wet and he blinks a few times. “Shit.”

“Get your hand off the fucking door!” Fiona yells and that’s Ian's cue to make himself known. When he gets to the living room Fiona and Mickey are both pushing on the door from each other’s end.

“It's fine Fi.” He speaks up making Mickey let go so the door shuts in his face. Fiona locks it and Ian rolls his eyes. “Since when do we lock the door?”

“Since the guy who hurt my brother came knocking.” She says leaning on it as if locking it wasn’t enough.

Ian chuckles at her protectiveness. “It's okay  Fiona. We need to talk at some point, right?”

Fiona sighs heavily, relenting. “You need me to stay?” Ian shakes his head no. “Okay. You need me just yell really loud and I'll come down with the bat.”

“Okay Fiona.” Ian pulls her off the door that she's still leaning on. He opens it to find Mickey facing the other direction smoking, waiting. “Hi.”

Mickey chokes on the smoke and ends up in a coughing fit. Ian doesn’t tell him sorry. He doesn’t deserve it. He finally gets himself together and looks up at Ian who's on the top step and leaning against the door. “Can I come in?”

“I'm not sure yet.” Ian crosses his arms.

“Fair enough.” Mickey clears his throat before rubbing the back of his neck. “I umm, I would have come sooner but Mandy wouldn’t tell me where you live.” He explains. “And you haven’t switched on your phone since…” he trails off.

“Since you fucked Reggie.” Ian completes even as it makes his stomach churn from the memory.

“I didn’t fuck him!” Mickey is quick to reply.

Ian drops his hands and exhales loudly with a relieved sob. The weight that gets lifted off his chest at the revelation takes him by surprise and he wipes off the surprise tears.

“I didn’t fuck him.” Mickey repeats stepping closer. “I did not sleep with Reggie Ian.” Mickey is now standing in front  of him. The bad boy holds Ian's cheeks and presses their foreheads together. “I didn’t fuck him.” he whispers for the fourth time. Ian nods with his tears still falling. He sniffs as Mickey wipes them off. “I'm sorry.” Ian nods some more.

They stand there with their foreheads touching and breaths mingling. Being close to Mickey like this makes Ian's knees go weak and his mind blank. Mickey pushes his lips towards his own, making them touch. But they don’t kiss. They just keep breathing. Mickey rubs his cold cheek against Ian's warm one. He does it a few more times then goes towards Ian's neck and just breathes on it. Ian has no fucking clue what Mickey's doing but he likes it. It feels so good.

Finally Mickey lifts his head and kisses him. Ian of course responds immediately. He makes small whimpering sounds as Mickey deepens the kiss and pushes closer. His back is beginning to hurt since it's pressing against the sharp piece of wood but he doesn’t tell Mickey because he doesn’t want him to stop. Instead he circles his hands around Mickey's neck and the kiss goes on for a few more minutes.

“I'm sorry.” Mickey pulls back and repeats. “I want you back Ian. I didn’t…”

“Fuck Reggie. Yeah, you’ve said it like fifty times now I get it.” Ian snaps angrily as everything comes back to him now that he doesn’t have Mickey's lips to distract him. He walks back inside and Mickey follows. “You didn’t. But what would have happened if Mandy had walked in fifteen minutes later? Or if she hadn’t walked in at all?” he asks sitting on the arm of the couch. “Can you tell me you wouldn’t have?” Ian thinks about how he would have been the one to find them and he shudders.

Mickey ducks his head. “I don’t wanna lie to you Ian.” He says honestly.

“Exactly.”

“But listen,” Mickey takes his hand and leads him towards one of the couches. They seat facing each other and Ian looks on as Mickey finds the words he's trying to convey. “I, I am not perfect.”

“I know that and neither am I.”

“I have never done this relationship thing and I _tried_. I really fucking tried. And this is exactly what I was trying to avoid. Hurting you. It killed me seeing your face that day. It wasn’t my intention Ian.”

“Except you did.”

“Yeah I did.”

“Why?” That’s all Ian wants to know. “You’re always telling me the sex is great, that I make you happy. Why did you feel the need to let fucking Reggie in?”  

“I… shit.” Mickey lets go of Ian to run both hands across his perfect hair. “I know that it's not an excuse but you told me you loved me and I freaked the fuck out.”

Ian's jaw drops and he stares at Mickey. “Seriously!” Mickey nods. “But I do! I have for a very long fucking time! Should I not have told you? Should I have kept it to myself?” he asks panicking.

“No, no, no Ian. This is _not_ your fault. It's just my commitment phobia.” Mickey is quick to calm him down. “I need you Ian, you make me a better person. My nick name at work before we hooked up was monster. You’ve changed me for the better. I can't… Ian, please don’t end us. I'll do better.” He pleads. “I'll fire Reggie if that’s what you want.”

“That’s not what I want!” Ian interrupts.

“What do you want? Tell me and it's done.”

“Firing Reggie will just make you get sued.” Ian says playing with Mickey's fingers that are on his lap. “For the record I see why the nickname fits.” He kids, making Mickey give a small smile. “I don’t know what I want.” He finally says.

Mickey pecks the hand holding his own. “I don’t want to lose you Ian.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for all the support on this fic u guys. i had no clue it was gonna get this much love. so thanx Caltyn and missannamurphy for prompting me this!! because i am enjoying writing it!!! and Bless u guys for all the comments and kudos and bookmarks and subscriptions and what have yous. tihihihihihihi


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry guys. Work has been fucking me in the ass without a condom. ಥ_ಥ  
> But I got today so here we go!

Ian exhales loudly before pulling his hands away and moving back on the couch so they're not as close. He sees Mickey's expression drop at the action but he's still hurting. 

"You know what sucks most about all this?" 

"What?" Mickey asks softly. He's never hurt over a man before. Never been affected by anyone he's fucked. This is a first for him. Ian brings all these feelings out of him and he just doesn't get it. How can a thing as simple as Ian sitting further from him hurt? At all? 

"The fact that Vince was right." 

"Vince?" Mickey asks shocked that the guy's name is coming up at all in this conversation.

Ian nods. "Yeah. That day at the restaurant," Ian swallows and rubs his eyes. "he told me," he swallows again. "He told me that it was just, and I quote, a matter of time before I'm crying into my pillow like the many guys before me." Ian looks at Mickey will glassy eyes. "And it really, really sucks that he was right." Because that's exactly what Ian has been doing for practically everyday this week. 

Mickey wants to punch Vince and his stupid fucking loud mouth. But he doesn't react. He sits there and watches his boyfriend. He feels so bad that he's the reason why Ian is like this. He really hadn't meant to hurt him. He knows Ian is really fucking soft and vulnerable which is why even though he'd been attracted to him he never made a move. He'd wanted to avoid this exact situation. 

But Mickey is no fool. He knows Ian is what's best for him. Because even though he's never been in a relationship, even though Ian is his first boyfriend. He really fucking loved it. He was happy. He loved when Ian would creep into his bed without warning. He loved waking up before the redhead and watching him sleep. He loved the way they fucked. It seemed way more that sex for some reason. With Ian everything is... _more_. The kissing is much more than that. Their touches, the looks they share. Ian just brings out sides of Mickey he didn't even know he had. But he likes it. He likes who he is with Ian. He likes knowing Ian....loves him. It feels good. It is a good feeling for someone who is not a family member to say they love him. 

Mickey knows he's not a good guy. He knows this. So for someone to find him lovable despite all of that, it makes him feel really fucking great. Even though he panicked, he liked hearing it. 

But just like so many things in his life he had to ruin this too. Now Ian doesn't seem like he wants to take him back and Mickey, Mickey really doesn't like the sound of that. He will do anything at this juncture to make sure Ian doesn't leave. He doesn't regret much in his life. He's always been unapologetic about his actions. But this time...for the first time in his life he wishes be could turn back time. 

"Ian I am so fucking sorry." 

"I know." Ian smiles softly at Mickey. "I know." He repeats. 

They sit there silently staring at each other. Ian wondering what to do next while Mickey waits him out. They get interrupted from their staring by a soft knock on the door. If it weren't so quiet they would have missed it. Ian looks at the door once before turning back to Mickey. 

"Gonna go get that." 

Mickey nods. "Kay." 

Ian stands up and walks towards the door. He pulls it open to find Earl with his fist in the air like he's about to knock again. 

"Earl?" Ian is very surprised to see him. "What are you doing here?" 

Earl grins at him. "You've been MIA and I wanted to make sure you're, you know, still alive?" He finishes with a deep blush. 

Ian looks behind him once to find Mickey watching the door with a frown. He clears his throat and turns back to look at Earl. Even after the failed date where Ian literally ran off Earl still hasn't gotten over him. Apparently. They haven't spoken since that day so this is a suprise. 

"Oh!" Earl quickly adds fishing in his bag. "I brought you your missed assignments." 

Ian takes the books from him. "Thanks." 

Earl looks around, fidgeting nervously. "Did I come at a bad time?" 

Ian shakes his head 'no' then turns his head to look at Mickey. He gasps in surprise when he finds the brunette is standing right behind him. 

"Who the fuck are you!" Mickey snaps and pushes Ian aside so he's standing in front of him. 

Earl visibly swallows. "I'm... I'm Ian's classmate?" 

"You fucking asking me?" Mickey continues angrily, stepping closer Earl. The latter is visibly scared and he almost falls as he walks backwards down the steps. 

"No. I'm not. I am. Shit. Ian?" 

"Mick, stop." 

Mickey is still breathing hard as he looks at this idiot who's clearly into _his_ boyfriend. He wants to snap his neck like a fucking twig right now but he's still in the dog house and killing Ian's friend won't work in his favor right now. So he steps back. 

"The fuck do you want from my boyfriend?" 

"I..." Earl looks at Mickey then Ian. He frowns. "Boyfriend?" 

"S'what I said, you fucking deaf or sum'n?" 

"No." Ian replies taking both men by surprise. "He's not my boyfriend." 

Mickey turns around so fast he goes dizzy for a second. "What?" It's a whisper. 

Ian crosses his arms and avoids his eyes. "Boyfriends don't cheat on each other." He shrugs. 

"Ian." Mickey pleads. 

"I would never cheat on youuuu." Earl prolongs the word when Mickey gives him a nasty glare. He shuts up immediately and steps even further back. 

"Ian I..." 

"In fact," Ian interrupts Mickey. "Earl and I have an unfinished date. Right Earl?" Ian asks looking at Earl. 

Earl grins happily and nods vehemently. "Yeah. Yeah." 

Mickey thumbs his nose as his entire body vibrates with anger. Anger he can't put anywhere because he would never shout at Ian and he can't punch fucking Earl. His blood is practically boiling at his point. 

"I think you should leave." 

Again, Mickey gets taken by surprise when the wind gets knocked out of him by that sentence. Ian is pushing him away in favor of this...this...this person. What the fuck! He wishes there was something he could do. Say. But at the end of the day he fucked up. But what does this mean? Ian going out on a date with someone else. Does this mean they're done? 

"We breaking up?" He asks and he can feel his heart breaking one piece at a time.

Ian takes a deep breath. That's not want he wants. At all. But he is still hurting. And seeing Mickey get jealous over Earl just makes him madder. He's got no fucking right. 

"I don't wanna talk about that right now." Is what he replies instead. 

Mickey sniffs and nods again. He looks between the two of them then walks away. Suddenly he misses those days when he didn't care. He misses those days where he didn't allow himself to date. If the ache in his chest and the sting in his eyes is what comes with caring, then he doesn't want to do it anymore. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kerri bear what's good?


	17. Chapter 17

Ian walks back into the house with Earlright behind him. He takes the couch he and Mickey had both sat on minutes ago. Earl takes the recliner and he still hasn’t wiped the loud smile off his face.

“Hey, going to Vee’s.” Fiona walks down fully changed and showered. She stops to look at Earl then frowns at Ian. He can tell she has questions but she doesn’t say anything. Instead she waves at Earl then squeezes Ian on the arm before walking out.

“So,” Earl stars, scooting forward on the chair.

“Shit.” Ian shuts his eyes tightly. “I am a terrible person.”

He opens his eyes to find Earl shaking his head vehemently. “Don’t say that Ian. You’re perfect.”

“I'm really not.” Ian looks at Earl apologetically. “We’re not going on a date.” He winces when Earl’s face drops. “I'm sorry Earl. I only said that to make him-“

“I get it.” Earl interrupts. “You needed to make him jealous.”

“I needed him to leave.” Ian replies. “I couldn’t think with him standing there. I love him Earl. I know you don’t want to hear this but I really fucking love him.” he confesses. “This is why you and I will never work.”

Earl nods like he understands but he's biting on the inside of his cheek. Clearly what Ian is saying hurts. But he wants him to know. He doesn’t want to give him false hope. He wouldn’t want it done to him so he comes clean.

“So there's no chance?”

“No.” Ian is quick to assure.

“But he cheated on you.”

“I knew it was a possibility. Even when I asked him to be my boyfriend I knew this day might come.”

“Yet you still…”

“Yes.”

Earl stands up. “I guess I can relate.” He steps forward and Ian does too. “I would forgive you for anything too.” Ian stands up too smiling gently.

“C’mere.” Ian pulls him into a hug and chuckles when Earl holds on tightly. “I'm sorry.” He pulls back and finds Earl nodding.

“It's okay. I'll find someone.”

“Of course you will.” He walks Earl towards the door. “Thanks for the assignments.”

“No problem. See you in class on Monday?”

 

  **~$~$~$~$~**

 

 

As Mickey had walked away from Ian and the other guy -whose name he doesn’t give a shit about- he had decided he’s done. He’s done trying to get Ian back because Mickey does not beg. Mickey Milkovich gets whoever he wants whenever he wants. So he had concluded he wasn’t going to beg.

Except.

Except this is Ian Gallagher. Ian who makes him smile. Makes him laugh. Things that never came easily before the other man.  Ian makes his heart fucking flatter and his chest ache sometimes when he looks at him. Ian Gallagher who looks at him with those stupid puppy dog eyes and Mickey will do anything he wants. So of course his resolve crumbles before he even gets to the apartment.

Shit.

The puppy is under his skin.

.

Ian sleeps the afternoon off hoping to wake up to a decision. He loves Mickey. He wants Mickey. He promised to forgive him if he ever cheated. He had promised to wait until Mickey learnt to be faithful. But he ends up chickening out. When he made all these promises he was hoping Mickey would try. That he wouldn’t actually cheat. Because Ian Gallagher may be a lot of things, but strong isn’t one of them.

When he said those things he thought he could take it. Take the heartache. He thought he was strong enough but he's not. He's been crushed and it hurts so freaking much. He's definitely not as strong as he thought he was.

Hearing it from Mandy and seeing Reggie run out was enough to torment him. He doesn’t know what he’d do if he saw Mickey in the act. He took a risk dating Mickey, that’s for sure. And even though he’s in love, he is not sure he can date a cheater. He’s not positive he can take anymore hurt. Not from Mickey. Not from the love of his life. 

This is why he takes a quick shower, leaves the house and heads to the North side. They need to talk.

.

Mickey is microwaving his sister’s delicious noodle stew when the door opens. He immediately knows it's his boyfriend –ex?- because his sister is one loud bitch. He doesn’t turn around. He keeps watching his plate rotate in the microwave. His heart is beating harder, faster than it was seconds before. Shit, he doesn’t know whether to love or hate what Ian does to him.

“What happened?”

“What?” Mickey asks surprised even though he doesn’t turn around.

“Between you and Reggie. If you didn’t have sex what did you do?” Ian doesn’t really want to know. He doesn’t even know why he's asking. But he came here to talk so he figured he might as well start with the root of their problem.

“Thought you were supposed to be on a date.”

“Don’t do that. Don’t deflect. We need to talk Mick.”

Mickey cancels the timer and turns around. “He’d just began… jerking me off when Mandy walked in.”

Ian inhales and clasps his hands. Running a hand across his hair, he looks at Mickey to find the latter watching him intently.

“Let’s just start over. Forget about all of that shit. I care about you Ian.”

“But you don’t love me.”

“I…” Mickey scratches his eyebrow with his thumb but finds he doesn’t know how to respond to that.

“We can't do this.” Ian’s voice breaks. He breathes then continues. “I can’t do this.”

 


	18. Chapter 18

Mickey looks up sharply, taken aback by the statement. “Wait so that’s it? I'm losing you because of one fuck up?” he can't believe this.

“One fuck up where you broke my heart!”

“I can do better. I can _be_ better.” He practically runs to stand in front  of Ian and look him in the eye. He takes the redhead’s long fingers in his hands.

“Does doing better include you never cheating on me again?” Ian asks earnestly. “Can you promise me that right now, right here?”

Mickey hesitates before replying, “Yes.”

Ian pulls away from his touch. “I don’t believe you.”

“What the fuck do you want from me Ian? Huh? We talked about this. Right there, in my bed. Remember that?” he points towards the direction of his bedroom. “Remember sitting on my lap and promising to never leave me if I ever fucked up?” he's breathing hard, panicking at the possibility of losing Ian. “Remember saying you would give me all the chances I need to change?”

“That doesn’t mean it's a fee fucking pass to cheat Mickey!”

“No, no it doesn’t. But I tried Ian. I really fucking tried.”

“We can't… I can't.” Ian shakes his head. He doesn’t want to do this. And Mickey is just making it harder for Ian to stick to his decision. “I can't take you cheating on me again Mickey.” he sniffs when a tear rolls down his right cheek. “I can't. Anybody else but you. I love you so, fucking much and…”

He groans loudly when Mickey greedily attacks his lips. The brunette grabs the back of his neck hard enough to leave marks as he pulls away to nip and suck at various spots around his neck. “Mickey.” Ian whispers before pulling Mickey back in and responding in kind.

Mickey pushes him backwards towards the bedroom and they only break the kiss to pull their shirts over their heads. Ian's fingers work quickly against Mickey's zipper and belt while the latter does the same to his. “Shit.” Ian moans when his boxers are dropped to the floor. He readily steps out of them.

They keep kissing even as they both drop on the bed fully naked. Mickey bites and kisses on his neck. He preps him fast and urgent. Ian stops him and instead reaches for Mickey's dick and jerks it a few times before grabbing Mickey's full ass and pulling him towards his ready hole. He has never wanted Mickey more. He needs him. _Needs_ to feel him.

Mickey spreads Ian's ass cheeks before thrusting inside him. He doesn’t go slow, doesn’t take his time. Ian winces at first but it quickly turns into loud moaning as soon as Mickey starts fucking into him relentlessly. Ian whimpers at the feeling of Mickey's dick penetrating him and he pushes down on it. Mickey is not moving fast enough for him so he immediately switches their positions.  He plants his hands on Mickey's chest and starts riding him fast and hard. A combination of a chuckle and a moan leaves Mickey before he's switching them back. Ian moans loudly when he brushes his sweet spot.

“Mick.”

“Ian.”

 Ian moans and shivers when Mickey says his name back. He wraps his arms around him and pulls him impossibly closer. He peppers Mickey's face with kisses even as the latter continues to move inside him. Ian all but cries at the pleasure of having Mickey inside him. It feels like months since they last did this. He finds himself getting on top again but he only grinds twice on Mickey’s sweet dick before the latter is on top of him again. They do this several times until Ian feels like they’ve used up the entire bed. At some point Mickey starts to slow down but Ian feels this is not the time.

“Fuck me!”

“Ian.”

“Mm.”

“Fuck, Ian.”

“Mmmm.”

“Kiss me.”

“Mmmmmmmm.” Ian lifts his hips when Mickey kisses him deeply and wraps his fingers around Ian's leaking dick. He pushes Mickey and switches their positions so he's on top. Again.

Mickey smirks and switches them back. He presses in deep and stills his hips. His dick presses relentlessly against Ian's prostate and the latter almost cries as the pleasure of his orgasm overtakes him. Mickey pulls back and slows down his movements but doesn’t stop sliding in and out of Ian. He bites on the redhead’s bottom lip as he comes too.

Ian rubs his sweaty back as they both lie there panting and smiling at each other like the two sated idiots they are.

 

**~$~$~$~$~$~$~$~**

 

When Ian wakes up they're still sleeping comfortably under Mickey's soft, comfortable duvet. He's lying on Mickey's chest and it feels like home. As if sensing Ian is up, Mickey stirs and lies on his side so they’re facing each other.

“Hey.” Mickey greets with a soft smile his voice groggy.

Ian settles on the pillow and closes his eyes when he feels Mickey caressing his waist gently. “Hi.”

“You okay?”

Ian opens his eyes with a wide smile. He's still sore from their fuckathon. “Yeah, I needed that.”

Mickey lets out a light chuckle. “Just so we’re clear I won that sex war you started.”

Ian laughs loud and free. “I wasn’t starting a war. It was the heat of the moment.”

“And the heat of the moment makes you want to be on top?”

Ian blushes and hides his face in Mickey's chest.

“You can't end this Ian. We are great together and you know it.” Mickey suddenly says, immediately killing the happy ambiance.

Ian pulls back and lies on his back. “That’s not the problem.”

Mickey straddles him and gazes into his eyes. “This because I won't say I love you?” He takes Ian's left thigh and squeezes it. Ian's soft dick twitches in interest.

“Stop.” He whispers.

“Why?”

Mickey's hand is now between his legs and he's fully hard within no time. “We have to talk.” Ian continues weakly.

Mickey trails his dick up Ian's thigh leaving precum in its wake. He pulls his thighs apart roughly and Ian gaps as Mickey pushes back inside him.

“Fuuuuuuck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End note edited for the sake of Suzy and anybody else who feels for Earl.**
> 
>  
> 
> (This takes place in future of course. Couple of months in)
> 
>  
> 
> _Ian is just walking out of class when someone taps on his shoulder. He turns around quickly to find Earl breathless and grinning at him._
> 
>  
> 
> _"What?" He asks smiling too. He can't help it. Earl's is infectious._
> 
>  
> 
> _"I'm sorry it's been a while. I just couldn't be around you knowing I couldn't have you. Needed some time to get over you." He explains._
> 
>  
> 
> _"I get it." Ian nods. He watches as Earl smiles shyly and knows that something's up. "What's going on?"_
> 
>  
> 
> _"You were right."_
> 
>  
> 
> _"What about?"_
> 
>  
> 
> _"Me finding someone." Earl replies, and Ian can practically feel the excitement radiating from the other man._
> 
>  
> 
> _"You got a boyfriend now? That's fucking amazing!" Ian exclaims, pulling Earl in for a hug._
> 
>  
> 
> _"I do."_
> 
>  
> 
> _"I am so happy for you Earl." He says genuinely._
> 
>  
> 
> _Earl pulls back with an even bigger smile than he had before. "His name is Gale and he's really nice. Two years younger than me, but nice none the less."_
> 
>  
> 
> _"That's great Earl." Ian replies as Earl's phone chimes with a text._
> 
>  
> 
> _"That's him now. We just made it official last night!" He's still buzzing with excitement and he makes Ian laugh. "I gotta go. See you around?"_
> 
>  
> 
> _"See you around."_
> 
>  
> 
> _Ian watches Earl run off and he walks away shaking his head in amusement. He could relate. Being in love was definitely something else._
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> There. Fixed it. ( ͡ʘ ͜ʖ ͡ʘ)


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have two hours before work so here u go.  
> Gotta say though, gonna take u by surprise here. Tihihihi.  
> Enjoy!  
> oh, almost 4got. for Earl sympathizers i left a little something for you on the end notes of the last chapter. <3 <3

It's been two months since they broke up. 

Ian hasn't been able to face Mickey since, seeing as he's the only man he's ever really loved. Still loves with his entire being.

_"We need to be honest here Mick." Ian says softly._

_Mickey rubs a hand across his face then leans back on the leather couch. "I know man I just don't fucking want to." He readily admits._

_"I don' want to either but you're not ready for a relationship."_

_Mickey wants to say he's ready to try for Ian. He wants to say that he will be faithful this time around. He wants to do so much more to convince Ian to not end them. But his redhead is so afraid of getting hurt Mickey just knows he won't believe him._  

Sometimes when Ian thinks about Mickey he grins so hard his cheeks ache. Other times his heart hurts from missing him. Needing to have him beside him in bed. Fuck, he misses Mickey's hold. 

_"So this is it?" Mickey's asks quietly that night in bed. "We're breaking up?"_

_Ian caresses the arms around him. "It's the only way. I feel like we both have a lot to learn before coming back together. I love you too much Mick." Ian turns around in Mickey's arms. "I know this might not make sense to you but it does to me. We can't be together you and I. We will just end up hurting each other." He pecks Mickey on the lips. "We're not ready."_

_Mickey heavily disagrees. He knows Ian means that **he** 's not ready.But he thinks he could be. So he wants to contest. He wants to disagree out loud but this is what Ian wants and they wouldn't be in this situation of it weren't for him so he just nods. "Will I see you again?" _

_"Of course Mickey. Of course." Ian replies his voice heavy with emotion. "We will see each other all the time. We just won't **be** **together**." _

Ian wraps his fingers around the hot coffee mug as he watches the cars passing by. He's seated outside a café waiting for Mickey. He's so fucking nervous, but God will it feel good to see him. His ex is like a literal breath of fresh air and Ian just wants to see him. They don't even need to do anything. Just looking at Mickey will make him whole again. 

He startles when a warm hand wraps around his neck. He quickly relaxes when his body recognizes Mickey's touch. Mickey bends, touches their cheeks together and whispers in his ear, "Hey." Before pulling his hand away and sitting across from him. The smile on his face makes Ian's stomach ache. But in that good way he likes.

"Hi." He replies shyly. "How have you been?"  

"Good." Mickey says as he gestures for a waiter. He orders some tea then turns back to Ian. "How is school?" 

"Almost done so yes!" He whisper shouts the last word making Mickey chuckle and do that hot thing where he runs a thumb across his bottom lip. 

Mickey watches Ian for a minute before asking. "How's Carl?" 

Ian frowns. "My brother?" 

"Fuck no. That idiot that's in love with you." 

"Oh Earl?" Ian laughs. "He's great. He's seeing someone." 

Mickey keeps the joy he feels at the information to himself. 

"So good to see you Mickey." Ian says shakily. 

"Wanna go back the apartment?" Mickey raises his eyebrow suggestively. 

Ian laughs so hard, he throws his head back. _God I love you._ He wants to say but doesn't. "Thought we were gonna give this friendship thing a go?" 

Mickey takes a sip of his tea. "No one says we can't still be friends even after we bang." 

The way he says that has Ian pulling his legs together as his dick fills up. He gnaws on his bottom lip watching Mickey carefully.  

“You know you love it when I rock my hips  gently as I suck on your neck.” Mickey continues. “No one says we can't be friends after I suck you off with my finger up your ass till you come hard down my throat.”

“Stop.” Ian pleads, closing his eyes as the image plays in his head. He is so hard under the table he can't get up if he wanted to.

“That’s not true.” Mickey's states making Ian open his eyes.

“What?” its a whisper.

“You don’ really want me to stop. You’ve never wanted me to and I doubt you’ll start today.”

Okay, fuck it. At this rate Mickey will just make him come in his pants. So he takes off his blue sweater and places it on his lap. Getting up, he glares at his ex. “Fucker. Just for that you’re paying for my two cups of coffee and my muffin.” He says before walking away. Mickey's laughter follows in his wake.

 

**~$~$~$~$~$~$~$~**

 

The following week Ian graduates. He and Mickey talk everyday even though his ex always insists on stirring them towards the bed. He clearly doesn’t take the break up seriously. But if Ian is being honest he doesn’t mind. In fact, he really likes it. Because this way, even if they're broken up, they are still in good terms and he gets to still have Mickey in his life.

Mickey and Mandy come for his graduation and they sit a row behind the Gallaghers. After, they go to the restaurant Mandy works at for a celebration lunch. Ian and Mickey don’t sit next to each other but they keep stealing glances. On his way to the bathroom Mickey passes by Ian and whispers; "Congratulations puppy." making the redhead blush so hard he has to cover his cheeks. Later that night he finds out from Fiona that Mickey paid for everything everyone ate and drunk.  

“Is he trying to win you back?”

She questions after the revelation and Ian has to wonder himself. But even if that’s the case he has to stick to his decision because at the end of the day he wants to be monogamous which is hard for Mickey. Not forgetting he's in love with the bad boy but the latter only cares about him. If Mickey loved him too then Ian would believe him when he made promises about never cheating again. But he doesn’t, so Ian still thinks they need to stay broken up.

Sometimes he wonders whether this is a smart or stupid decision. Denying himself happiness. But then he recalls the massive pain he went through when Mickey cheated and he decides to go with smart.

 

**~$~$~**

“Wow.”

“What?”

“It’s just… it's been two months and you two are still broken up. I'm surprised honestly.” Mandy shrugs.

Ian pokes on the fried chicken Mandy made for him. They are at the apartment. It's just the two of them since Mickey traveled two days ago for work. “Yeah I know. But it has to be this way.”

Mandy wants to ask why. Why Ian thinks a break up is the way to go. Why he can't give Mickey another to chance to prove himself. But then she remembers that Ian is her best friend and she knows him better than anybody. And Ian is the true definition of vulnerable. He probably wants to take Mickey back but keeps thinking about what happened last time, then hurting all over again. At the end of the day the redhead is trying to protect himself and she gets that. But at what cost? Because, her idiot brother might not know it himself, but Ian is not the only one head over heels here.

“What happened with that guy Damien?” she asks instead.

“He's still asking.” Ian shrugs. “You don’t find it weird? I mean he used to be my teacher. Just because he's at another school now doesn’t make it okay to start dating him.” Ian takes a bite of his potato. “Right?”

“I don’t know Ian. What do you want?”

“I don’t know. I mean, I can't just wait around for Mickey to decide he wants to be faithful to me, right? I mean, who knows if he's fucking Reggie as we speak?”

Mandy opens her mouth to defend her brother, tell Ian he's not fucking Reggie. But then she realizes that even _she_ doesn’t know that for sure. It could be Reggie, it could be someone else. When Mickey cheated the first time it wasn’t because he didn’t care about Ian. And it wasn’t because he wanted to. It was because he couldn’t help himself. God damn Mickey and his commitment issues.

When Mandy doesn’t reply, doesn’t tell Ian Mickey isn’t out there having sex, his heart drops. She might as well have confirmed his suspicions. Which is turn cements his decision.

They are not ready. This is not the time to be together. Ian loves Mickey but it's not enough to sustain them. Especially when the love is one sided.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> told you this is not what u expected


	20. Chapter 20

Fingers probing.

Fingers in his ass.

Feels good. Feels fucking amazing. Mickey's fingers always feel fucking amazing.

They're both moaning, even though Ian is the one getting pleasured. “Fuck Mickey! Feel so fucking good.”

“Yeah? You like that?”

“Love it.” Ian moans. His breathing coming in short breaths. “Don’t stop.” He pleads, wrecked. “Don’t you dare fucking stop.” Mickey's fingers brush his prostate and he shudders through another moan. “Jesus.”

He grabs Mickey's cheeks and pulls him in for a messy kiss as the latter continues to finger him mercilessly. Ian is going to die from pleasure. And he won't regret it one bit. He licks into Mickey's mouth and fucks himself on the digits inside him.

Mickey hooks and twists, he kisses Ian's cheeks and then whispers; “I love you.”

Ian's orgasm punches out of him, taking him by surprise. He comes so hard he has trouble with his vision, and hearing and basically all his fucking senses.

“Jesus fucking Christ Ian, wake the fuck up!”

Water gets splashed in his face and Ian is sitting up immediately, glaring at his big sister. “FIONA!” He shouts angrily wiping water off his face.

“That’s what you get for waking me up with your sex dream and yelling out your ex’s name. Jesus Ian.” Fiona throws the cup she used on the bed and walks out of the room.

“Fuck.” Ian curses before lying back on his wet pillow. The disappointment he feels over the fact that that was a fucking dream makes him oblivious to the now wetness in his bed and the drying jizz in his boxers.

 

**~$~$~$~$~**

 

 

“How’s Ian?” Mickey asks his sister who's busy glaring at him. “Fucking what?”

“I am a freaking chef, I made fucking breakfast but you’re choosing to eat fucking cereal?” she glares impossibly harder.

Mickey rolls his eyes and reaches for one of the sausages on the plate.  He waves it at her before taking a bite then repeating; “How’s Ian?”

Mandy avoids his eyes as she bites and chews on a piece of mango. “He's fine.”

Mickey watches his sister suspiciously. “What are you not telling me?”

“Nothing.” Mandy mumbles sipping on her juice.

Mickey reaches over the table and grabs her wrist. “He okay? Because if he's not and you're not telling me…”

“He's fine, Jesus.” She snaps, pulling back her hand and finally lifting her head to look at him. “You care so much about him why are you two still broken up?”

“Twas his decision and you know this.”

“Please.” Mandy scoffs.

“What?”

“You really think Ian likes being broken up? Wanted to break up at all?”  Mickey scowls at her. “Anyway, since you asked. He has a lunch date with his former teacher.”

Mickey swallows. “What? Isn’t that against the fucking rules or something?”

“One, dear brother, Ian graduated. Second no, he transferred like fucking ages ago.”

Mickey shifts in his chair. He doesn’t like this. And not just because he's jealous. “Shouldn’t that make him like, _way_ older?”

“You're older than Ian.” Mandy points out.

“Yeah but with like, four years.” Mandy shrugs. Mickey taps on the table with his spoon. He chews his bottom lip in thought before getting up. Walking towards the couch, he grabs his sweater and car keys that are on the coffee table before walking towards the door. “Be right back.”

“Mick, you refuse to tell him you love him, let him date.” Mandy speaks up from the table.

Mickey pauses for a second but otherwise doesn’t stop, doesn’t say anything. He just walks out the door and heads towards the elevator.

 

**~$~$~$~$~**

 

Ian exhales nervously. He looks at himself in the bathroom mirror one more time and throws some cold water on his face. He wishes this date was with Mickey. He already got over the nervous phase with Mickey. It would have been so much easier. And fun. He thinks about his sex dream then shakes his head. He can't do that. He shouldn’t do that. He's going on a date with Damien. _He needs to be moving on._

He walks back to his room and gasps audibly, shocked. “What are you doing here!” he exclaims in surprise, even though he's grinning like the joker. He's so happy to see Mickey. Even if he's sitting on his bed with sweats and that grey sweater he only wears around the house.

“Hi puppy.” Mickey grins up at him making Ian want to jump up and down excitedly like the puppy Mickey insists on calling him.

“Was there a fire when you left the house?” he asks instead drawing Mickey's attention to his outfit.

“Sum’n like that.” Mickey bites on his bottom lip and leans back on his elbows, his crotch on display in the loose pants. Ian swallows and busies himself in looking for his wallet. “Hear you’re going on a date.”

“Is that what this ambush is about?” Ian stops searching to turn and look at Mickey who's knocking his knees together making his dick move left and right. Fucker’s got no underwear. Ian swallows audibly this time making Mickey smirk knowingly. “Mandy needs to mind her business.” He says.

Mickey sits up, elbows on his knees. “You're really doing this? Going on a date?”

“I'm trying to.”

“Already?” Mickey blinks up at him and Ian feels a little bit guilty. He ducks his head and plays with his fingers.

“It’s been over two months.”

He says quietly. He sees Mickey's sandled feet walk towards him and he looks up. His breath stutters when the bad boy stands in front of him so they're toe to toe. Damn he looks good. Even in his sleep attire he looks amazing. Ian inhales deeply trying to remember how to breathe. Why does Mickey always have to take his breath away? Literally. Mickey traces his finger down Ian's clothed arm from the elbow to the wrist and the action makes Ian feel like the room is running out of oxygen.

“Mickey.” he whispers and his heart flips when Mickey grabs his neck with both hands, caressing his cheeks with his thumbs. “I'm going on a date.”

“Oh I got that.”

Mickey replies casually before crashing their lips together. Ian inhales loudly before grabbing onto Mickey's sweater and kissing back just as fervently. Giving back as good as he's getting. And boy is he getting it good! Mickey licks into his mouth, sucks on his tongue, his lips possessively. Shit, this is Earl all over again. Except this time Ian likes it. Likes that Mickey's jealous. He moans when Mickey tilts his head and kisses him impossibly harder. Almost like he's trying to remind Ian of what they had. Ian doesn’t need reminding. He thinks about Mickey and their relationship on a daily fucking basis. But he's not turning this down. Over his dead fucking body.

Mickey's hands leave his face and go down to his ass. Kneading, and squeezing.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Mickey, Mickey, Mickey.

More, more, more.

Like Mickey can hear the thoughts in his head, he kisses him harder, pulls Ian closer and brushes a finger against Ian's clothed hole. Shit, he's going to jizz in his clean jeans like he's fucking 15 again. He's busy moaning at Mickey rubbing their dicks together when his phone rings, interrupting their make out session.

“Shit.” Ian pushes Mickey away gently, cursing while looking around for his phone. He picks it up from his night stand but drops it in his rush. “Shit.” He repeats before picking it up and pressing on the receive button. “Damien!” Ian answers breathlessly, his voice high pitched.

Mickey sits on the bed again and leans on the wall scoffing at the name. Ian turns around to glare but finds Mickey intently watching his ass. So he blushes instead.

Mickey continues to blatantly undress Ian with his eyes, enjoying how the redhead’s cheeks are turning redder from blushing. He doesn’t pay attention to the conversation. It doesn’t matter, Ian will always be his.

“You realize you’re just wasting your time, right?” he asks when Ian hangs up. The redhead blinks at him. “And Damien’s time.” He finishes with a shrug.

Ian bites on his bottom lip -that he's pretty sure is still swollen from the delicious abuse from minutes ago. He watches his ex with amusement. “I have no will power when it comes to you.” he states the obvious. “So stop kissing me!” he quickly grabs his wallet that’s on the floor near the foot of the bed. Ian rushes out of the room as fast as he can before he ends up riding his hotter than a fucking volcano ex.

Mickey watches him leave and lies on the bed. The pillow is wet and he off handedly wonders if Ian showered in bed. He pushes it away and grabs the second pillow. Staring at the ceiling his hands behind his head, Mickey thinks about Ian's final words before running out and just laughs.

 God, he loved that fucking puppy. Now if only he trusted himself enough not to hurt Ian again.


	21. Chapter 21

_Two days ago._

“Vanilla yoghurt, right?” Ian nods silently but the pleased smile on his face lets Mickey know the redhead appreciates the gesture.

Ian is at an interview and he called Mickey before going in because he was too nervous. He'd been pacing in front of the office building wanting to cancel the whole thing but Mickey had talked him out of it. Next thing Ian knows the brunette drives over, and is now seated next to him in the reception. Oh, and he brought Ian's favorite yoghurt. How is it possible to fall even more in love with your ex? Fuck, Ian's life is complicated.

“You got this, relax, a’ight?” Mickey encourages. He doesn’t need to. Ian relaxed the moment the bad boy walked through the room. “You brought everything you need?”

Ian nods. “Yeah. Thank you.” he lifts the drink but Mickey's just waves his thanks away. “Hope I get this job or I'm giving up.” he pouts.

Mickey wraps an arm around Ian's neck so the latter is leaning on him. “You wanna give up after one interview? Thought you were stronger than that Gallagher.” He jokes.

Ian lifts his head to look at him. “It's my eighth one.” Ian admits sadly making Mickey frown. “Yeah. And they might not say it to my face, but they don’t think I can cut it. They think I'm too young or too, or too inexperienced.” Ian says bitterly pulling away from Mickey's hold. “Might as well not waste my time on this one either.”

“Hey, stop. It's going to be fine.” Mickey pulls him back in as they hear the next person get called. Ian nods even though he's not reassured in the least. “You will go to this interview. You will do your fucking best. And then if they still don’t offer you the job, I'll get you something.”

“Really?” Ian asks, hopeful.

“Yes really. Have I ever lied to you?” Mickey asks.

“No, you only cheated.” Ian replies but Mickey can tell he's joking. It sucks sometimes that he's in the friend zone, but if Ian can joke about the cheating then that’s good. It's progress.

“Ha ha.” Mickey mocks pulling on Ian's left ear. “Fuck you man.” Ian laughs and it makes Mickey's stomach flatter. He's got a love/hate relationship with the things Ian does to him. He's never liked being weak or letting anyone have any power over him but lately he's been realizing it doesn’t matter if that person is Ian.

Mickey admits it had taken him too long to realize he loved Ian back. At which point they had already broken up and he wasn’t able to say it back when the redhead needed to hear it the most. But now he knows for sure. Severally he has dropped everything for Ian. The latter didn’t even need to ask. Severally he has found himself fucking day dreaming in his office like a high school kid. Picturing himself getting the puppy a puppy of his own. Preferably with red fur.

Stupid thoughts like that, that make Mickey want to punch himself. But he's been getting them more and more and at first it had been worrying. But he's not an idiot and he’d come to the realization that he’d do anything for Ian. Whether friends or lovers Mickey will always be there for Ian no matter what.

So yes, he loved Ian.

But he didn’t trust himself yet not to hurt him. Again. Breaking Ian's heart had been the worst thing Mickey has ever done to be honest. And he has landed several people in hospital. But seeing Ian's unhappy face and sometimes angry had done things to Mickey that had made him regret his actions. He had gotten Reggie transferred to a different office building the next day.

He didn’t need a constant reminder of the biggest mistake he's ever made.

So yes.

If Ian doesn’t get this job Mickey would get him one. Because the redhead cannot suffer, and will never suffer as long as he's alive.

“You know people, huh?” Ian teases with a bashful grin.

“Course I do. You're talking to Mickey fucking Milkovich, a’ight?” he teases right back.

“Ian Gallagher?” an elegantly dressed lady with five inch heels calls looking around.

Ian stands up. “Alright Mr. Hot shot. I'm up. Wish me luck!”

“You don’ need it.” Mickey says confidently taking the yoghurt Ian hands him. Ian takes a deep breath and grabs his documents before following the well dressed lady.

Mickey walks out to go have a smoke. It will be a while before Ian is done after all.

.

It's not even ten minutes before Ian is running out of the building upset. He walks past Mickey angrily and the latter reaches for his hand and stops him. “Hey, hey, hey. Talk to me.”

Ian is trying to hold it in but Mickey can see he's seconds from crying. Ian pulls his bottom lip into his mouth and bites on it hard. Mickey reaches out and places a thumb on Ian's chin. He slowly pulls down on the abused lip.

“Talk to me.” He repeats, gently.

Mickey’s touch calms Ian immediately and the lump in his throat dissipates. “They don’t buy my age and just like the rest they think I'm inexperienced.” Ian shrugs. “Unfortunately Mr. Gallagher, you're not what we’re looking for at the moment.” Ian imitates whoever before looking at Mickey sadly. “I didn’t wait for them to finish. Just got the hell out of there. If everyone is looking for experience, how am I supposed to get it when no one will hire me?” he cries, his face contorted in unhappiness and amplified sadness. Mickey wonders if Ian has completely forgotten what they talked about before he went in for the interview.

He doesn’t remind him however. Instead he pulls Ian in for a hug and runs a hand through the red hair comfortingly. He hears a satisfied sigh leave the other man and it makes him smile. “Fuck them. It's going to be fine. I got you.”  He pulls back and looks Ian in the eyes. “Wanna hit MacDonald’s? You can have anything you want, on me.”

Ian looks at him still pouting. “I want like, a full chicken.” Mickey laughs as they head towards his car. “And then ice-cream. Lots of it.”

“Alright puppy, anything you want.”

 

**~$~$~$~$~**

 

_Now._

 

 

They're watching a movie two weeks later at the apartment when Mandy gets called in last minute for work. So it's just Ian and Mickey left to finish the movie. They’ve gotten into a weird kind of friendship. Mickey has accepted this is what they are now. Friends.

He likes it. They were never really friends before they started banging. So he doesn’t mind. Plus he loves having Ian around, and anyway he can have him, Mickey appreciates. Like now, as Ian lies on his lap during this movie, Mickey doesn’t miss the chance to stroke the red hair. That’s another thing he loves about their ‘friendship.’ There is still some level of intimacy between them. They still make out because when Mickey kisses the redhead he responds immediately. Ian always tells him to stop, but it always fascinates Mickey that the request comes _after_ they're done kissing. The thought makes him grin.

        

        Ian is still very much in love with Mickey. Even though admitting that makes him feel a little bit guilty considering his date with Damien last night. But a fact is a fact. And the fact is that he's still in love with the bad body. And even though Damien seems like a nice guy so far, Ian doesn’t think he’ll ever really measure up. Doesn’t think anyone ever will really.

           

       Mickey on the other hand is sure by now if he said ‘I love you’ at this moment it would be the truth. But Ian is still adamant about them being just friends. And on top of that he's still seeing that Damien character. So he's not surprised when Ian sits up, pauses the movie and says;

“Damien wants us to be serious.”

Mickey has been jealous of the guy every time he spends with Ian but now he just wants to find him and shoot him right between the eyes.

“Mickey?” Ian prompts when he doesn’t get a reply.

“Is that what you want?”

It really fucking sucks. If Ian decides to say yes to Damien then Mickey won't get to touch him and kiss him whenever he wants. Ian made such a big deal about cheating, he won't cheat on Damien. No way. Mickey swallows and looks at Ian who's watching him intently. He looks back at Ian, waiting for his reply.


	22. Chapter 22

Ian wrings his hands and avoids Mickey's eyes. "Its not like... I have any other options. No one is banging down my door to ask me out. And you... You're not ready. And, and D isn't... he's a good guy." He shrugs. "So, why not, right?"

Okay, enough is enough. _It's not like I have any other options?!_ What the fuck? Mickey's right here and he loves him. So he clears his throat and decides it's now or never.

Ian's chest palpitates, waiting for Mickey to say something. Hoping something has changed since they broke up. But Mickey isn't saying anything. He's just looking back at him.

"Ian, I..."

Ian's phone rings. It's Damien. "One minute." He gets up and goes towards the double doors of the balcony and opens them, stepping outside.

Mickey rubs his hands nervously. He's going to tell Ian they need to be together. He will tell him he's in love with him too. He's never said or felt this shit before but there's a first for everything he supposes. He grabs his glass of pineapple juice laced with vodka and takes a sip.

"What?" He hears Ian suddenly exclaim before laughing loudly. "No way!" More laughter. "You'd do that for me?" He watches as Ian looks at his shoes shyly and a blush take over his face. "I guess?" He shakes his head. "No, it's not that I don't..." He clears his throat. "like you, I just needed time to think about it. You know I like you D."

Fuck.

Mickey bends down and runs his hands across his hair. He can't tell Ian he loves him. It's a bad idea. He's still learning. And its not a guarantee that he won't end up breaking Ian's heart _again_. This Damien guy on the other hand looks like he knows what he wants. He's already asking for commitment after four fucking dates. That's a person who understands shit if Mickey has ever seen one.

So what if he's older than Ian?  
So what if he's Ian's former teacher?

What matters is that he will treat the redhead right. And as he watches Ian smile and blush and look happy, Mickey doesn't want to take that away from Ian. He loves him. He really does love him. And if Ian has a chance at happiness, real happiness, who is Mickey to ruin that?

So when Ian comes back to the living room practically fifteen minutes later and asks, "What were you going to tell me?"

Mickey stares at him earnestly and takes his hand. He gives it a soft peck that makes Ian grin. "You are the best, fucking human being." Ian rolls his eyes.

"You're the best fucking human being too Mick." He replies shyly.

Shy Ian just makes Mickey want to hold him and never left him go. Fucking puppy bringing all these stupid feelings out of him.

"And you deserve to be happy. You need someone who will love you wholeheartedly and be faithful to you."

"Oh." He watches as Ian's smile drops.

"Ian, you were just one the phone with Damien for like an hour!"

Ian pulls away his hand and crosses both against his chest. He then stands up and faces away from Mickey. "I know, I know, I just thought that maybe..." He shakes his head trying to will the emotions away. "And it wasn't an hour and he was telling me about the new job he got me."

"See! He's considerate, and he really likes you. And you like him back, right?"

"But I don' love him."

"You will get there."

Ian turns around to look at Mickey. This isn't what he wanted to hear. Maybe he should have ignored Damien's call until he and Mickey were done talking.

"He won't hurt you Ian. And we both know I can't make that same promise."

Ian exhales with a shudder before sitting back down. _Fuck._ Mickey is right. He may always be there for him and is his best friend at this point, but he could cheat again. And Ian doesn't know if he'd be able to take a second time. Shit, he barely survived the first one. And while he doesn't know for sure that Damien will never cheat on him, he could at least give him a chance to try.

"So you approve of Damien?"

Mickey approves of himself but Ian's shot at happiness is with Damien at the moment. And if he really cares about Ian -which he does- he would let him have that. Which he does.

 

**~$~$~$~$~$~$~$~**

 

Ian starts his new job two days later. It's not bad. He likes it. At least he doesn't have to struggle as much any more and he can help Fiona out with the bills. He hasn't seen Mickey for two days. He traveled for work. 

But even if be sees Mickey it's gonna suck because the latter won't be able to touch or kiss him with Ian pretending he doesn't like it. He's in a relationship now. It would be really hypocritical of him to cheat on Damien after he'd given Mickey so much shit about it. Plus he knows how much it hurts and he wouldn't do that to someone else. 

Damien texts him, asks to meet for lunch, celebrate Ian working. Ian smiles and packs up his shit. Damien _is_ a nice guy. He's no Mickey, but so far all he's done is try to make Ian happy. 

Ian remembers when they were still teacher and student. Damien's eyes would linger on him more than was necessary a lot of the time. And Ian would think he'd done something wrong. But Damien never asked to see him after the lesson so Ian always assumed he'd imagined his own things. Or whatever other reasons he came up with at the time. 

So to say the least he'd been surprised to hear from his now boyfriend three weeks ago. "Hi." Ian smiles as soon as he walks out of the office building. 

Damien is leaning on his car, smoking a cigarette and waiting for him. He had brown hair and is a foot taller than Ian. He has some build on him but not as buff as Mickey. His eyes are green like Ian's. "Hey gorgeous." He replies making Ian blush. He kisses Ian on the lips lightly before gesturing for him to get in the car. 

**~$~$~**

"So how's your first day, are you managing?"

Ian stirs his food and nods. "Yeah. It's alright." 

"Good. The owner is my brother so don' worry your pretty little head about anything." Ian nods again. 

The waiter comes and places their drinks on the table. "Thanks." Ian smiles up at him. 

"You're welcome." The waiter smiles back and walks away. 

Ian sees Damien has stopped eating. "Wha...what's wrong?" 

"What was that?" 

Ian looks around the restaurant. "What was what?" 

"That thing with the waiter." 

"I was thanking him?" 

Damien watches him for a few minutes and then smiles. "Okay." 

Ian stops eating to look at his boyfriend. "Is there something wrong? He brought our drinks and I was being polite. That's all." 

"Yeah?" 

"Yes." Ian takes Damien's hand that's on the table. "That's all. I promise. I would never." 

Damien brings his other hand and covers Ian's. "Okay, okay. I just... I like you so much Ian. And the thought of anyone else..." 

Ian smiles, touched and flattered. 

 

**~$~$~$~$~$~$~$~**

 

Mickey sits at what is now their regular cafe and watches a guy with a motorcycle ride off. He should get one. He's always wanted one of those but his sister won't let him, that bitch. You would think she was paying for the damn thing. 

He checks his watch and frowns at the fact that Ian is late. He's never late. If anything he always gets here first. Mickey cringes when a thought passes in his head that Ian could be having sex. Thankfully he spots the redhead before his thoughts can spiral. 

Ian looks... tired. 

Mickey gets up to hug him. They hold on tightly to each other, lingering for a few minutes before pulling back. Mickey pulls back Ian's chair and they settle down. 

"You alright? You look like you haven't slept." 

"I haven't." Ian runs a hand across his face. "Was working late for the first time, and then when I got to Damien's, he kept me up..." 

"Gonna have to stop you right fucking there." 

"I wasn't gonna say sex!" Ian smiles and Mickey finds himself needing to breathe. God, he'd missed this stupid puppy. They haven't seen each other in close to three weeks. "Okay then proceed." 

"He's got like a bunch of rules he needed us to go over. It's no big deal." 

Two things down on Mickey. One, "Are you living together?" 

"No." Ian takes a sip of his coffee and nods appreciatively. "But he wants me to move in. Says his place is close to my work and we're boyfriends now so..." He trails off. "It was one of the rules." He waves Mickey's concern off. 

"Yeah." That's the other thing. "Rules?" 

Ian looks at him. "Sounds weird, I know. But everything on there I was planning on doing anyway." 

What the fuck?! "Ian," 

"Enough about my relationship. How is work? It's been a while." When Ian isn't working Damien wants them together and rule number two in the _printed_ paper -Ian assumes it was a teacher thing- read that Ian wasn't allowed to keep in contact with any of his exes but he doesn't tell Mickey this. 

"Mandy misses you." Mickey says. "Says she wants her best friend back." 

"Yeah, yeah. I'll call her." 

"Is your new job really keeping you this fucking busy?" Mickey asks in disbelief. "You just started."

Ian shakes his head no. "Sometimes I leave in the afternoon even." 

"So why..." Mickey trails off putting two and two together. "I don' think I like this Damien very much." He says honestly. 

Ian scoffs, but he's smiling. "Of course you don't. You're my ex." 

"No like," 

"Where did you travel to last week?" Ian interrupts. 

Mickey leans back on his seat. He answers Ian's question and they continue to talk and drink more coffee. Ian insists on paying because he's got a job now. Mickey smiles at him but he can't help but feel weary about today's meeting. 

There's something fishy about Ian's relationship. And judging by how Ian kept changing the subject, he knows it too. 

But problem is, how does Mickey butt in without seeming like a jealous ex?


	23. Chapter 23

"Good morning." Damien sing songs in Ian's ear and the redhead grins with his eyes still closed. "Waaake uppp." He continues. 

Ian finally opens his eyes to find the taller man's face inches from his. "What time is it?" 

Damien kisses his forehead and sits up. "Time to do nothing. It's on Saturday so it's just you and me." 

Ian sits up on the bed and takes the coffee Damien hands him. "Thanks." He takes a sip and watches his boyfriend who's caressing his knee. "Hey D?" 

"Yes love?" 

"I haven't seen my best friend in a month and I had to promised to..." He pauses when Damien frowns. "her," Damien's expression clears. "It's a girl D."

Damien cackles lightly and drops his head. “I'm sorry love. I just… you know I don’ like…”

“I know.” Ian interrupts with a smile of his own. “ _She,_ Mandy and I have been friends forever. And I miss her.” He adds.

Damien nods. “Okay. You’re my boyfriend now and I don’ wanna hog ya.”

Ian looks at Damien amused. His first boyfriend was never jealous. And Damien is way too jealous but Ian… Ian likes it. He thinks sometimes it could be too much, but at least he's showing he does care about Ian. Which is all he could ask for in a relationship really.

“So I'll see you when I get back?”

Damien gets up. “I'll drive ya.”

Ian blinks at the brown haired man who's already dressing. “What?”

“I'm not letting you take public transport.”

“It's not that far.”

“Ian, I'm driving you.” Damien says with finality. “Unless there's a reason I shouldn’t?”

Ian shakes his head vehemently. He slides off the bed and places his cup on the night stand. Wrapping his hands around Damien, he nuzzles his head in his broad back. “No reason. Just let me take a shower real quick.”

Damien turns around and pulls Ian in for a gentle kiss. “Okay.”

 

**~$~$~$~**

 

They drive to Mickey and Mandy's apartment with Ian looking out the window. Damien has their hands entwined between them. Ian is starting to think Damien is the really possessive kind. But he isn't worried. He knows himself. And he will do little to make Damien angry. He's always been soft, humble, submissive. They will work well, he thinks. 

Which is why even though what he knows so far about Damien would spook most people, Ian isn't worried. He can make any relationship work. 

Damien parks by the road and Ian pecks him on the cheek. "Thanks." He goes to pull his hand away but Damien doesn't let him go. "D." Ian chuckles. "You have to let me go." 

Damien smiles and let's go of him. Ian turns to open his door but a strong hand grabs his hand. Damien slides down his hand till he's holding onto Ian's wrist. "You read and understood the rules, right? We're good?" 

Ian nods. "Yes."

Damien nods. "Okay, okay because I... I really like you Ian. I want us to be together a long time." 

Ian agrees. "I'd like that." 

Damien nods again. Ian winces as his boyfriend's grip gets tighter on his wrist. "So this Mandy is a girl?" 

"Yes, D." 

They stare at each other for a while until Ian can't take the pain anymore. "Damien you're hurting me!" 

Damien lets go of him like he's been burnt. "I'm sorry love, I'm so sorry. I guess I don't know my own strength." He chuckles. 

Ian nods and rubs his wrist. "It's..." Shit. He's already bruising. He grabs his sweater on his seat that he didn't plan on taking with him. "It's fine." He says pulling the clothing on. He can't let Mandy see his hand. She would tell Mickey and it would be a whole thing. "Bye." He shuts the door.

"Ian!" He turns around. "You're coming back, right? Coming back to me?" Ian hesitates. "I didn't mean to hurt you." Damien pleads his eyes getting wet. "I didn't, I'm sorry." He begs from the driver's seat and Ian can see the insecurity there clear as day. Ian sighs and opens the door again. 

He caresses Damien's cheek. "I'm coming back." 

"Okay." Damien nods happily. "I know I can be difficult sometimes but you just need to understand me. That's all." 

Ian pulls the older man into a kiss and then shuts the door and leaves for real this time. He gets into the expensive apartment building and into the elevator. Mandy opens the door after he rings the bell once. 

“Ian oh my God!” Mandy hugs him so tightly he can't breathe. He hugs her back with a laugh. They pull back and he shakes his head.

“Missed you too.”

Mandy clicks her tongue as she leads him towards the living room. “I mean, I'm all for you getting a boyfriend. But not if you're gonna be MIA.” She sits down and grabs him one of the cocktails she made them. “My own recipe.” She says proud and excited. “My boss just let me add them to the cocktail menu yesterday. I'm gonna make a ton of money off of this.” Ian takes a sip and moans. “It's good, right?”

“Really good.” Ian concurs as he takes one sip, then another and finishes the entire glass. “Another.”

“Careful babe. There's alcohol in this.”

“There is!” Ian exclaims in shock even as he pours himself another. “So hard to tell.”

“That’s why I think it's really gonna appeal to the female market. "Or men.” Ian says gesturing to himself. He laughs. “Mick would never drink this though.”

They both laugh and nod in agreement. “So… tell me. How’s Damien?”

“He's great.” Ian replies setting his current drink down. “He does everything for me. Practically worships me. It was scary at first but I've gotten used to it.”

“What do you mean?”

“He does everything for me. Cooks for me, does my laundry, makes me breakfast in bed more often than not. Day to day life normal things.”

“Mandy pours herself another glass. “I don know if I find that romantic or creepy.”

“It's not when you think about it. All he asks is that I follow his rules.”

“Rules!” Mandy spits all over Ian in shock.

“Bitch! He just bought me this shirt.”

“Ian, what rules?”

“Don’t cheat, don’t lie, don’t withhold information, don’t be late, don't sleep out, cut off all communication with your exes, never let a call or text go unanswered, shit this stuff is good.” Ian takes off his sweater and pours himself a third glass. “We don’t drink much Damien and I, so I have missed this.” He notices Mandy is too silent so he looks at her. She's looking at him like he's a crazy person. “What?”

“You don’t find anything wrong about those rules?”

Ian shrugs. “Yeah, I know they're weird, and they were like twenty, but all those are things i planned on doing anyway.”

“Mickey is your ex and I'm pretty sure you guys meet four times a week for coffee and or lunch.”

“I'm not cutting off Mickey from my life.”

Mandy crosses her arms. “What happens when you break these, _rules_?”

Ian has no idea. “I don’t know.”

“Ian,” Mandy takes his hands. “I love you, but you can be so fucking naiv…” she trails off.

“Shit.” Ian curses taking back his hands.

“Ian,” Mandy calls, warning in her voice. “How the fuck, did you get that bruise?”

“A fucking hobo grabbed me on my way here. Or a mad man. I'm not sure. He refused to let me go. It was insane!” he finishes his third? Fourth? Glass of whatever Mandy's calling this. “This is really good Mands. I'm so proud of you.”  

“Ian.” Mandy calls gently, quietly. “All jokes aside. How did you get that bruise?”

 


	24. Chapter 24

Mickey walks in just as Mandy is clearing the glasses. "Were you entertaining?" He asks then gasps in mock surprise. "Is he still here?" He takes off his leather jacket and throws it on the couch while still by the door. Mandy only rolls her eyes harder. 

"It was Ian. You just missed him." 

"Ian was here!" 

"Yeah. I just called him a uber. He's sloshed out of his fucking mind." She laughs.

"You gave him your weird drink things?" 

Mickey quickly avoids the punch that gets thrown his way. "Fuck off. He loved it and so do people from the restaurant." Mickey mimics her by mouthing her words like the grown up he is. "Fucking child. Sorry you missed him."

"Meeting him for breakfast tomorrow. Is all good." 

Mandy watches her brother toe off his shoes and get comfortable on the couch. She clears her throat. "So umm, what do you think about Ian's new beau?" 

Mickey shrugs. "Don't care." 

Mandy scoffs. "Yeah and I'm a natural blond." 

Mickey glares at her. "Ian deserves to be happy." 

"And is he? Happy?" 

Mickey nods with an ache in his heart. "Yeah. He is." 

Mandy crosses her hands where she's standing by their kitchen table. Ian had told him the bruise on his wrist is as an accident. He'd insisted they'd been play fighting and Damien had tagged too tightly. When she'd asked him why he'd acted shifty, he'd said it was because he knew she would misinterpret the whole thing. 

Mandy didn't buy it. 

But even though her best friend is soft, he wouldn't stay in an abusive relationship. She knows he wouldn't be with a person who hurts him.  And if Mickey hasn't picked up on anything, then maybe she's blowing things out of proportion. 

"Good." Is all she says instead. "Beef or pork?" 

"I want chicken." 

"On it." 

 

                            ♚♕♚♕

 

When Ian gets to Damien's he's a staggering mess. His own damn fault. But he has really missed alcohol. He's been dating Damien for a month plus and during that time he hasn't had a single drop of alcohol. Now he's so drunk the uber driver has to take him to the door. 

"I'm fine." Ian insists as they leave the elevator. 

Of course he trips and the guy laughs as he grabs onto his elbow. "Sure you are. Which door?" 

Ian points at it and they walk towards the apartment. The guy -Ian has forgotten his name- knocks and the door opens before he's even done. 

"Ian, love! I was so...worried." Damien trails off taking in the stranger. "Who the fuck are you?" He snaps angrily. "Get your filthy hands off my..." 

"Easy man. I'm just the uber driver. Figured you wouldn't want your boyfriend spending the night in the pavement so I helped him up. You're welcome." The driver snaps back before handing Ian over. "Rude ass bitch." He mutters as he walks away. 

"What did you say to me?" Damien fully intends on going after the guy flipping him off when Ian starts to fall over so he grabs onto him instead. "Dammit." 

Ian chuckles. That was a fun scene to watch unfold. "Mandy needed me to sample a new drink." He slurs as he gets guided into the house. "Her own recipe. My girl is going places." He praises. 

"Can't believe you got drunk." Damien says dropping Ian on the couch. "Didn't even know you drunk."

Ian takes off his sweater with difficulty. "Of course I fucking drink. Why wouldn't I?" 

"You've never..." Damien trails off. "Why didn't you call to say you'd be late?" 

"It's like...like nine pm." Ian finally gets his sweater off and he sighs in relief. 

"It's in the rules Ian, you said you understood." Damien says with clenched teeth. He's tapping his foot, his arms crossed as be glares at Ian. 

Ian groans. "Not with this fucking rules again. I came home, didn't I?"

"Those _fucking rules_ are important Ian, we need them if we're gonna make this work." 

"They're stupid." Ian mumbles. 

"What?" 

"Nothing. Can we do this tomorrow? I just wanna lay down." Ian says as he does exactly that, sprawling on the couch. 

"No! We are doing this now. You said, you were just going to _hang out_ with your best friend. Instead you get drunk, come home late, have no fucking courtesy to call, you bring another man to my house," 

"That is not what happened." Ian defends with his eyes closed. This is too much for his drunk mind. 

"And for all I know, you two went to a club and met God knows who and did God knows what!" 

"For all you know?" Ian slurs. 

"Yes. For all I know." 

"Because I can't possibly be telling the truth. You got trust issues man." Ian scoffs. 

Ian is just starting to doze off when he suddenly feels a hotness on his cheek. It takes a while for him to realise he's been slapped but when he does he opens his eyes wide looking at his boyfriend who's standing over him, breathing heavily. 

_Whack!_

The second slap has Ian sitting up and sobering up immediately. 

"Do not, insult my intelligence." Damien berates lowly. 

Ian's cheek is aching, and one side of his face is on fire. "Did you just..." He finds himself tearing up and sees the exact moment Damien regrets his actions. "Did you just...hit me?" 

"I...I...I..." Damien drops to his knees so hard the sound echoes in the quiet apartment.

"Damien." Ian swallows, his tears falling. He gets up and steps away from him. He can taste blood in his mouth and his tongue aches. He must have bitten it after he got slapped. Holy shit. 

Ian back away till he's at the door. He turns around to open it but Damien's hand is on top of his as he grabs the knob. 

"Ian don't." 

"No. You just fucking hit me. We are done!" 

"Nonononononono don't do this. Don't do this Ian. I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking." 

"No." 

"Ian I swear to you. It will never happen again I'm sorry." Damien pleads getting on his knees again. "Ian please don't leave me." 

But its pointless because Ian can still feel the heat on his cheek where Damien slapped him. Twice. There is literally nothing he can say to make Ian stay. 

"I love you." 

Except that. 

Ian sniffs. "What?" 

Damien nods and gets off his feet. He grabs Ian's neck and touches their foreheads together. "I love you." He repeats. "It's the only reason why I'm like this Ian. I swear to you." 

Ian is crying again, but for a completely different reason. 

"I love you so fucking much. I promise it will never happen again." 

Damien loves him. 

Damien freaking loves him.

Ian has never heard that from someone who wasn't his blood. Or Mandy. Damien loves him. Someone loves him. Him. Ian. With all his weird characteristics. He has a boyfriend and that boyfriend _loves him_. 

Ian can't leave him now. He can't go anywhere. Where would he go? He can't leave Damien only to be single and unloved again. So he nods, more tears leaving him. 

"Never again." 

"Never again." Damien quickly concurs. He pulls Ian in for a kiss but Ian winces painfully. "Sorry. Sorry." He apologizes and kisses Ian again, only softer this time. 

 

                            ♚♕♚♕

 

Ian finishes brushing and looks at himself in the mirror. He should have iced his face. Now its a mess and he can't meet with Mickey looking like this. The bad boy wouldn't understand. 

                              ♚♕

Mickey drives to their usual meeting place whistling happily. It's on Sunday which means they're meeting earlier than they usually do. Today Mickey plans on taking Ian for a drive. He will try to convince the redhead to spend the entire day with him. Mickey needs more than two hours today. 

He's almost there when Ian calls. "Gallagher. Almost there." 

_"Umm, Mick?"_

That doesn't sound good. "Hold on. Let me pull over." He places the phone on his lap so he can stop the car. "You're not coming." He points out, disappointed. He can literally feel his heart drop.

 _"I'm sorry Mick. I really wanted to be there. But something came up that I can't get out of."_ Ian winces on his end. 

"You alright?" 

_"Yeah, yeah I'm fine."_

"Tomorrow then?" 

There's a heavy silence on the other end before Ian speaks up again. _"Can I let you know in the morning?"_

Mickey wonders why Ian can't tell him now but he doesn't ask. "Okay." 

Ian hangs up and Mickey stares at his phone for a few minutes. He throws the gadget on the back seat and slumps back on his seat. 

He was really looking forward to seeing Ian today for some reason. 

 


	25. Chapter 25

_Mickey Mickey Mickey Mickey Mickey_

"Huh? Ian!" Ian quickly looks up at his upset boyfriend from where he's curled up on the sofa. 

"Yeah?" He replies timidly. 

"Why would you do that? You knew how important his dinner was to me yet you still chose not to show up. Do you know how embarrassing that was? Do you know..." 

_Mickey Mickey Mickey Mickey Mickey_

Damien suddenly takes a sit next to Ian on the couch. He feels Damien's arm around his waist and he stiffens. "Ian." Damien says quietly, softly. "Why didn't you come to the dinner? It was important to me." 

Damien was being honored at work for some shit Ian has forgotten. Or has chosen to forget. Ian still mad for being hit three days ago, refused to show up at the agreed venue. The moment Damien had come home after the party he'd found Ian cooking and pushed him against the kitchen counter angrily. Ian in the haste to steady himself, had reached back and cut himself on their kitchen knife. Damien had taken care of the cut but his palm was aching like a motherfucker. Damien had apologized profusely, again. And now here they were. Ian getting berated for missing the stupid party, even though he's the one who had every right to be mad right now.  

Ian takes a deep breath."Maybe if you hadn't hit me I would feel more obliged to do what you ask." Ian replies even as he knows he could be risking getting another slap. 

Damien let's go of him. "I know I shouldn't have laid my hands on you. Or pushed you. And that's why I apologized. But if you keep bringing it up, it makes me think you haven't forgiven me." 

Ian shakes his head no. "I have." 

"Good. Now Ian, I wouldn't be with you if I didn't love you. I take care of you. I do everything for you. We live together. I got you a job. All these things I did because I love you. So why can't you just..." He sighs and rubs a hand across his hair. His look of despair makes Ian feel guilty. 

"I'm sorry." Ian apologizes reaching for one of Damien's hands. "I shouldn't have stood you up." 

Damien nods in agreement. "No you shouldn't have." He looks at Ian and caresses his face. "I love you, Ian. Why can't you see that?" 

Now Ian feels bad for using Mickey as his happy place. "I'm sorry." He mumbles. 

Damien smiles at him and kisses him. He pushes Ian gently by his shoulder so he's laying on the couch. Damien straddles him and continues to kiss Ian as he takes off his clothes. 

Ian kisses back and tries not to go to his happy place during this too. 

 

                            ♚♕♚♕

 

Mickey paces back and forth in his office. He's got this weird feeling in the pit of his stomach. The feeling that something is wrong. He doesn't know what this something is, he just feels like something is...  _off_. 

Mandy walks into his office with his lunch. She slows down and takes him in. "You okay Mick?" she stealthily places the food she brought on the desk. 

"Are you?" 

"What?" Mandy asks confused. 

"Are you okay? Your life, your relationship, is there something you're not telling me?" 

"No everything's good." Mandy pushes Mickey so he's sitting in his chair. "Mick." 

"What about the rest, is Ig alright? Colin, Jamie?" 

"Mick you're scaring me." 

Mickey sighs and touches his stomach. "I just feel like something's fucking wrong and it's preventing me from doing my job! So pick up your fucking phone and confirm that everyone's okay." He commands, breathing hard. "Please." 

Mandy takes the seat opposite her brother and cautiously asks, "Is Ian okay?" 

Mickey frowns at her. "I... I haven't seen him on a while but we talk everyday and he sounds fine. He's fine." Would Ian make him feel this way? Would Mickey sense a distressed Ian? Have they gotten to that point? "He's fine." He repeats. "But I need to see him to be sure." He picks up his phone and dials Ian's phone. 

_"Mick?"_

Mickey finds himself exhaling in relief just from the sound of his ex. "Hi, Ian." 

 _"Hey Mickey!"_ Mickey smiles from how Ian seems to suddenly perk up. 

"How are you doing? You know, after canceling on me Sunday?" 

Ian laughs. _"I'm sorry about that. Are you free today?"_

 _For you? Always._ Mickey thinks. "When and where?" He asks instead which sounds really fucking eager but he doesn't give a shit. 

Mandy smiles at him as soon as he hangs up. "What?" He snaps. 

Mandy shrugs. "Nothing just..." She bites her lower lip cheekily. "Have you fucked anyone since you and Ian broke up?" 

"You got a point?" 

Mandy stands up and picks up the lunch she'd brought Mickey. Putting it back in her bag, she smirks. "My brother the Casanova who couldn't go twenty four hours without sex has been celibate for months. God demn." She makes a mocking noise with her tongue. "I'm just gonna take my food since we both know lunch with Ian trumps baby sister's food. Even though she _is_ a professional cook." 

"Chef." 

"Fuck off." 

Mickey laughs as Mandy leaves his office. He feels energetic and happy all of a sudden. And the bad feeling in his stomach is gone. 

Weird. 

 

                            ♚♕♚♕

 

Ian steps out of the elevator and takes in the restaurant at the very top of the hotel. It's really freaking nice. Eating outside seems to be their thing now. Whether it's at the cafe or at the very top of a four star restaurant. He looks around for Mickey and sees the bad boy waving at a table in the far corner.

Ian practically jogs there. Mickey stands up and pulls him into a tight hug. Ian can help but breath him in. He has missed him so much. 

"Hey Mick." 

Mickey chuckles and kisses Ian's hair before pulling away. "Sit."

Ian does so and takes off his jacket. He looks around again and then up at the umbrella shedding them from the sun. "This place is nice." 

"We could always switch from the café to here." Mickey suggests. 

Ian shrugs. "As long as I get to see you I don't care where." 

Mickey nods with a sly smile. "How've you been?" 

"Good. Good." Ian takes this moment to sip on the glass of water in front of him so Mickey doesn't pick up on the lie. 

"That's good." Mickey swallows. He's really hating that Ian is fine and happy in a relationship with another man. Isn't there something he can do to get him out of it and single again? He misses him. He missed touching Ian, missed kissing Ian, _being_ with Ian. "Are you sure?" He asks. 

"Yeah!" Ian frowns at Mickey. "Why wouldn't I be?" 

Mickey lifts his hands in surrender. "I just... You know, just checking. You don't have to be in a relationship." 

Ian smiles calming down. Mickey doesn't know anything. He's just being Mickey. "You just want someone to be single with." 

Mickey shrugs unapologetically. "I just miss doing certain things to ya. That I can't if you're taken." 

Ian blushes, hard. "Jesus Mickey." 

A waiter interrupts them to take their orders. 

They eat and talk and laugh and catch up. This is why Mickey is Ian's happy place when Damien is giving him a hard time. Being with Mickey is amazing. Perfect. Makes Ian forget of all his troubles. It really sucks that they're better off as friends. 

Ian has a terrible history when it comes to relationships. His first boyfriend treated him like he was invisible, Mickey cheated on him, and his current one is violent. He has the shittiest luck. 

But here, in this moment with Mickey, he can only think about how happy he is. Even if they're just friends the bad boy makes him feel like he's in another world. A happier, better world. He is so lost in this time with Mickey he doesn't notice how the brunette keeps looking at his bandaged hand every time he cuts into his steak. Mickey stops eating and looks him straight in the eye. 

"What?" Ian asks. 

"What happened to your hand?" Mickey asks calmly, with narrowed eyes. 

 Ian glances at it. "Kitchen accident." 

Mickey takes a sip of his cold water. "Should be more careful next time." 

"I will." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry guys. The angst continues. But this is the direction this story wants to take. If I try to get this over with it will just feel rushed and...no, just no. 
> 
> So....yeah. sorry.


	26. Chapter 26

"Is this okay?" Damien asks gently tucking a stray hair behind Ian's ear. They're standing outside his workplace where Damien is dropping him off.  

Ian nods. "Yeah I like it." He says glancing at his new T-shirt. "Green is my favorite color." 

"Good." Damien pecks him on his cheek. "See you at home?" 

"Yeah." 

Ian stays in place as he watches Damien drive off. Sometimes he's so good. A lot of the times he's good. It's his anger that usually gets the better of him. He straightens his T-shirt before finally heading in. 

Ian walks in to find Mandy waiting at his tiny cubicle. He smiles and bends, then kisses her on the cheek. "You're gonna get me in trouble." 

"Cant blame me." She shrugs. "Seeing you these days..." She trails off. 

Ian sighs in guilt. "I'm sorry Mands." He sits on his desk and takes her hand. "Today, you and me, lunch." 

"Depends." 

"On what?" Ian asks surprised. 

"On if you're gonna cancel." 

Ian bites his bottom lip guiltily. He knows he's on the wrong, but Damien really does like to keep Ian to himself. If he didn't lie about what time he leaves work, he would never see Mickey. So yeah, he knows he needs to make it up to Mandy. 

"Was supposed to meet Mickey but he'll understand." 

Mandy nods and stands. "Okay." 

 

                            ♚♕♚♕

 

"So do you like your tiny cubicle?" Mandy teases. 

"At least I have a job." Ian replies laughing. He grabs the bottle of white wine from the ice bucket and pours some on his empty glass. "A paying job. And it feels good Mandy." He shakes his head. "Feels real good." 

Mandy smiles at him. "I'm really happy for you." 

"I'm really happy for me." They both laugh and shake their heads. "How's your relationship?" 

"It's fine. Ever since I started at the restaurant we've been great. It's the college life that used to make him insecure." Mandy takes a bite of her salad and looks at him. "How's yours?"

"Good." Ian nods thinking about said relationship. They haven't fought in two weeks so... "It's good." 

Mandy smiles because that does sound like the truth. "I'm glad. For a minute there I was worried." 

Ian chews and swallows. "About what?" 

Mandy shrugs wondering if she should say anything. "I thought, I don' know. I just, never mind." 

Ian sighs discreetly in relief, because Mandy happens to be very intuitive and she seems to be letting her suspicions go. 

 

                            ♚♕♚♕

 

 

"We've been here so long they're all beginning to look the same." Ian groans and slaps the nearest suit lazily. 

Mickey laughs. He looks at where Ian is inspecting a purple suit and he has to remind himself he's not Ian's boyfriend when he gets the urge to wrap his hands around the redhead. 

"Who would wear a purple suit unless it's for Halloween?" 

"The joker?" Mickey replies walking towards Ian despite his urge. He wraps an arm around his neck instead and they stare at the suit together. 

"Yeah." Ian rubs the hand around his neck. He leans back into Mickey and closes his eyes. "This feels nice." 

Mickey chuckles lightly and presses his nose in Ian's hair. "Miss you." 

Ian takes a deep breath and turns around. "Miss you too." He says softly taking Mickey's hand. He squeezes it once then let's him go. Taking a deep breath, he steps away from the temptation that is Mickey Milkovich. "So!" He claps once diverting from the topic. "Have you settled on a suit yet?"

Mickey grins and shakes his head in amusement. "Yeah. Where did the guy go? Did you catch his name?" 

"Omar!" Ian shouts and Mickey laughs loudly. Ian shrugs. "What? He said to call when we need him." 

Omar comes rushing in. He's a sweet blond that's shorter than Ian but slightly taller than Mickey. He's shy and he blushed just from being told he was a good employee. He reminds Ian of himself. 

"Did you find a suit Mickey?" He asks eager and helpful like before. 

"Yeah." Both Ian and Mickey reply. 

"Great. Which one is it?" 

Mickey points at the suit he liked and Omar nods before taking it off the rack. Mickey walks towards where Ian is standing. 

"Did you need one?" 

Ian cackles. "For what?" 

"Maybe if you started wearing suits instead of T-shirt and jeans, they'd move you up the ladder." Mickey raises a teasing eyebrow. "At work?" 

Ian shakes his head. "Nah, I'm good." Apart from the part where he doesn't like suits, he can't help but think about how he would explain to Damien where he got the expensive suit. 

"It's ready." Omar interrupts them. 

Mickey turns around and reaches for his wallet then hands his card to Omar. He turns back to Ian with a smile but the redhead watches as Omar tries to say something but fails. 

"You okay Omar?" He asks making Mickey turn around to face the shy employee.

Omar nods as he swipes the card. He hands it back to Mickey and  wipes his hands on his trouser nervously. Mickey puts the card back in his wallet but they're both looking at the blond curiously. 

"I," Omar starts. "I am really fucking shy and usually I don't do this but," he licks his lips and looks at Mickey nervously. "You're really fucking hot. Please tell me you're single." 

Ian's heart stutters. His heart beat accelerates and he can't help but glare at the guy he liked only minutes ago. Mickey looks at Omar, surprised. 

"Umm..." 

"What?!" Ian exclaims. 

Omar steps back shocked by Ian's volume. "I'm asking Mickey out?" 

Ian scoffs incredulously. "No!" 

"I'm asking Mickey though." 

"You're not his type." 

Mickey looks as Ian glares at Omar and he can't help but laugh. He thumbs his bottom lip and shakes his head. This is too funny. 

Ian sees Omar swallow and step forward bravely. He stretches out his hand and Mickey gives him his phone. Omar puts his number in the said phone. Ian scoffs and crosses his arms pouting. What the hell?!

 

                            ♚♕♚♕

 

They're driving from the shop to the hotel in silence. Ian is giving him the silent treatment and Mickey can't help the grin on his face. It's just too damn amusing! The entire drive to the restaurant -which is where they alternate with the café- the silence continues. 

They park in silence. They get into the elevator in silence. They seat at their reserved table in silence. When their food gets there Ian doesn't eat but instead keeps poking at his. 

"You're brooding." Mickey points out. 

"M not." Ian says even though he's still pouting. He snaps his fingers at the waiter and Mickey knows he's really mad. "JD on the rocks. Now." 

"Damn." 

"What?" Ian snaps. 

Mickey drops his fork and sits back. "Why are you upset?" He can't help but laugh. 

"I am not upset!" More snapping. 

"Right." 

The drink gets placed in front of him and Ian swallows it in one gulp. Taking a deep breath he looks at Mickey. "I'm not upset." He says, voice calmer. 

"I can go out with whoever I want Ian because I'm not in a relationship, you are." 

Ian feels like cold water just got splashed on his face. He's getting jealous over Mickey giving Omar his number and yet he's supposed to be in a happy relationship with Damien. Ian places his elbows on the table and buries his face in. 

"Shit." 

 


	27. Chapter 27

Chuckling gently, Mickey takes his hand. “It's okay Ian.”

Ian shakes his head no. “It's really not. I have no right…” Ian checks his watch. 5:30PM. He gasps in shock. Shit. He got carried away. Shit. He should be home by now.  He stands up and Mickey does the same. “I gotta go.”

Mickey grabs his hand and points at his untouched food. “You haven’t even eaten yet, where’s the fucking fire?”

“There's no fire I just have to get home.” he hugs Mickey tightly before pulling away with a smile. “Thank you for a wonderful afternoon.” Mickey picks up his phone and car keys making Ian panic. “What are you doing?”

“Taking you home.”

“No!” Mickey frowns at him and Ian clears his throat. “I mean, you must have places to be. You're Mickey Milkovich.”

Mickey scoffs with a shake of his head. “You're funny Gallagher. Let’s go.”

_Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit._

Is the only thing playing in Ian's mind on rotation. He should give Mickey a false address. Shit, that won't work. Back at the Gallagher house Mickey never used to drive away until Ian was inside the house. Shit. He would hope that Damien isn’t home, but those odds would be stacked against him.

“Ian!” Ian snaps his head towards Mickey.

“Yeah Mick?”

“Where did you go?”

“I'm okay. I'm fine. I'm good. Why wouldn’t I be? Pull up here.” Ian says in one breath. Mickey hasn’t even parked the car before Ian is  jumping out of the car.

“Ian, what the fuck? Stop!”

Ian closes his eyes and exhales a shuddering breath. He can hear Mickey get out of the car and walk towards him. He feels a strong hand on his upper arm and he can literally feel himself calm down. “What is going on?” Mickey asks quietly still standing behind him. “Do you have a curfew or something?” Mickey jokes just as softly, as Ian turns around.

Ian swallows. “It's not that. I'm sorry, I'd didn’t mean to worry you. I just completely forgot me and Damien had this thing…”

“Oh.” Mickey exhales in relief though not 100%. “Okay then.” He nods once, squeezes Ian's arm  before the latter quickly heads towards the apartment building and walks in.

Mickey stands there until he sees an apartment switch on their light in the next few minutes. Then and only then does he get back in his car and drive away. He looks at the building in the review mirror. Something is wrong. Something is really wrong. Ian seemed scared.  Afraid. If there's something Mickey has gotten good at, it’s reading Ian. And that redhead seemed scared. What reason does Ian have to be scared of his own boyfriend?

If Damien is hurting his puppy in any way, Mickey shakes off that thought. He can't even think about that because all hell would break loose for sure.

 

 

**/ <>/<>/<>/<>/<>/<>/**

 

 

Ian walks in stealthily into the dark living room. Why is it dark? He switches on the lights and yelps in surprise when he finds Damien sited on the couch facing the door. He is breathing hard and his face is red with anger.

Oh no. “D I'm really sorry. I lost track of time.”

Damien gets up and Ian instinctively steps back. “When 5:00PM hit and you hadn’t come home yet, I got worried, like the caring boyfriend that I am.” He starts. “5:30 I called your work and guess what they told me?” Ian shakes his head. “No go ahead, guess.”

Ian steps back until he's flat against the wall. “I d..d..don’t know.”

“YOU LEAVE WORK AT 2:00!” Damien shouts and Ian's heart starts beating unusually fast. “You leave work every day at two. Why the hell did you lie to me Ian!” Ian opens his mouth but nothing comes out.

Damien is next to him in three strides. He raises his hand and Ian flinches. But he only does it to grab onto his neck. He forcefully drags Ian –by his neck-  towards the other side of  the room and pulls the curtain aside angrily. Damien pushes Ian towards the window pane and yells, “Look!”

Ian who didn’t realize he'd closed his eyes does so. He curses  internally when he realizes Damien saw Mickey drop him off. Which means he also saw Mickey touching him.

Ian is dead.

Literally.

Damien pushes Ian back so he lands on the single couch. “What did I say about bringing other men around?”

“He's just Mandy's brother D, please.” Ian pleads.

“Is he now?” Damien walks towards him and Ian braces himself. “Are you cheating on me? With him?” Ian shakes his head vehemently. “STOP FUCKING LYING!”

“I'mnotisweartoyouD.”

“Liar!” _Punch_. Ian grabs onto his left eye. “Stop. Lying.”

Ian grits his teeth and stands up angrily. He masters every strength he has and punches Damien back. Taken by surprise, the man staggers back. Ian checks behind him and he didn’t close the door. Yes! He takes this opportunity to rush towards it but he feels a strong hand turn him around and Damien backhands him with his right hand. Now both sides of Ian's face are aching.

“You don’t, cheat on _me_! You don’t, lie to _me_! You don’t, hit _me_!” _Whack_. Another back hand and suddenly it's more painful than the first two combined. Ian slides to the floor and the tears start to flow. He curls in on himself, by the wall near the door. He looks up at Damien and sees the angry look falter, but his face goes hard again. “You're cheating on me.”

“I'm not.” Ian quickly denies.

“IAN, I SWEAR TO GOD!”

The volume is so loud and commanding Ian flinches. The door is still open and if he's fast enough he can leave and never come back. He quickly stands up but in his haste to get away he runs into the rail and hits his nose and forehead. The pain is excruciating and he's now bleeding.

“Ian!” Damien shouts and is that _worry_ , in his voice?

Fuck him. Ian tries getting up again but it's too fast and he gets dizzy. But he doesn’t care. He needs to get out of there so he steadies himself. Grabbing onto his nose, he turns to face Damien who now has guilt plastered on his face.

“You're a fucking asshole!” Ian shouts. “I don’t know what took me this fucking long, but if being a punching bag is the price I have to pay for love,” Ian swallows glaring at Damien with tears still running down his face. “I don’ want it.”

With that he runs out. He runs down the stairs and out the building. He runs and runs and runs. Mickey's apartment is fifteen minutes away but Ian just runs. He doesn’t stop until he gets there. Unlocking the door, he walks into the house breathlessly. He locks it and tries to catch his breath as he walks towards Mickey's room.

Ian knocks gently before walking in.

“Ian?” Mickey asks in surprise as he shuts his laptop.

He notices the state Ian is in and his fists clench automatically. His blood boils with anger as he slowly pushes away the covers. Ian starts sobbing again as he crawls inside Mickey's bed. He settles himself on the brunette’s lap and lets it all go. He cries and cries and cries until his throat gets sore.

Mickey rubs his back and hair through it as Ian's pain makes his stomach ache. Mickey finds himself sniffing back tears at the state the man he loves is in. After what seems like hours, Ian exhausts himself and promptly passes out.

Mickey doesn’t know what the fuck just happened.

All he knows is that someone is going to pay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaah i c those of u who thought this day would never come.
> 
> tumblr me, twitter me, facebook me, same name!  
> or catch you in facebook group, **Let's Be Shameless Shamelessly**


	28. Chapter 28

                        Mickey wakes up before Ian. He gently slides off the bed and tries his best not to wake him. Ian shifts and settles better on the pillow. Mickey watches him with a grimace. There's dry blood on his face, the pillow and it just makes Mickey angry all over again. He can't help himself as he pushes the red hair back slowly, avoiding the bruise on his forehead. 

With a heavy sigh, Mickey shakes himself off to shed some of his anger. He sniffs and just as quietly leaves the room. As soon as he walks into the kitchen Mandy let's out a loud scream. Mickey is quick to cover her mouth with his palm. 

"Shhhhhhh he's sleeping what the fuck?!" 

Mandy pulls away his hand with wide eyes. "Who's sleeping and why the fuck do you have blood on you?"

Mickey glances at his white tee with a frown. "Shit." 

"Mick." She whispers, shocked, worried. 

He sighs. "It's Ian's." 

"What!" She exclaims before running towards the bedroom. Mickey is quick to grab her hand and stop her. 

"Let. Him. Sleep." 

"Mick, I need to see him. I know Damien did this." 

"And you will. Just not right now." He let's her go. "He cried for hours last night." Mickey is breathing hard again. "I just wanna kill that..." He groans and walks back towards the kitchen. "Let him rest. Please." He looks at his sister's face. "He cried himself to exhaustion and I am so fucking mad Mandy." 

Mandy walks towards him looking at him sympathetically. "I know." 

Mickey rubs his forehead then frowns. "Wait, why did you automatically suspect Damien?" Mandy shrugs. "Mandy. Did you know he was hitting Ian!" 

"No!" 

Mickey steps closer. "But?"

Mandy walks towards the living room and takes a seat. Mickey is right behind her. "One day Ian came over and he had a bruise on his wrist. But he denied and told me Damien would never..." She trails off. "He...shit. How bad is it?" 

Mickey joins her on the leather seat. "It's pretty fucking bad Mands. His face." 

"What are you going to do to him?" 

"He hurt Ian. Gonna return the favor." 

Mandy leans back on the chair. "Wanna come with." 

"No." 

"I won't do anything! I just wanna pack up Ian's shit." 

Mickey nods. "Fine." he gets up and heads back to his room. "Let me check on him." 

 

 

                              **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

 

              When Ian comes to, he's hit with a sharp pain in his temple. After that it only takes a minute for last night to come back to him. The fear, the anger, the pain, the regret. All emotions directed at his now ex. Ian knows that he can be soft sometimes, and his self esteem is nothing to admire. But he regrets having stayed when Damien hurt him that first time. He regrets not running after that. He is not stupid, once a cheater always a cheater and once he hits you, he’ll do it again. That’s how the world works. But Ian had wanted love so bad that when Damien said those three words…

He groans and stretches out his hand to reach for Mickey. His solace, his comfort. The man he still loves even though the bad boy doesn’t love him back. But Mickey cares and that's enough for Ian. He touches Mickey's side of the bed and there’s… nothing. It's cold. Meaning Ian has been sleeping by himself for a while.

_Shit._

He came to Mickey because he believed he could count on him. He believed that even though the man doesn’t love him he cares. He cares enough to not leave him.  Now Mickey has neglected him and left him by himself.

Ian tries to ignore the pain that shoots through him. He shakes his aching head and scolds himself when hot tears sting his eyes. He will _not_ cry. He will not.  
Unfortunately few things in life ever go Ian's way and his body betrays him as stupid fat tears roll down his face. His eyes are aching and swollen from crying too much last night but still, here he is. Being pathetic and crying, as usual.  

Suddenly there's a warm body next to him, crowding his space. Ian is forced to look up at Mickey who is pulling him into his arms.

“I'm here, I'm here.” Mickey comforts as Ian tries to get a hold of himself.

Ian nods and grabs tightly onto him. Mickey scrunches up his face in pain as blunt nails dig into his arm and waist but he doesn’t wince. Ian is hurting and Mickey is here for him. Mickey will always be here for him. “I thought you left.” Ian mumbles into his shirt.

“I know, I know.” Mickey kisses the top of Ian's head and sways him.”I'm here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Ian sniffs loudly and blinks up at Mickey, his eyes still teary. “Don’t say that.” Mickey frowns. “You gotta pee sometime.”

He laughs loudly caught by surprise. “Oh, he's got jokes now.”

Ian who's now relaxed and relieved to have Mickey with him again, relaxes his tight hold so he's just touching Mickey gently. “It wasn’t the first time.” He confesses.

Mickey thought it was but after Mandy told him about the bruise he now knows last night had to have been a repeat. “Why did you stay?” He asks gently.

Ian shrugs. “’M hungry.”

“Ah shit, you didn’t eat yesterday, did you?” Ian shakes his head ‘no.’ “Kay.” Mickey slides off the bed and helps Ian up. “But first, you shower.”

 

 

                               **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

 

“I know it's in the morning, but you need all the energy you can get.” Mandy says placing a full plate of food on the coffee table in front of Ian. “You're gonna eat that, and you're gonna finish it.” She orders sternly.

Ian nods and does as told. It is really good beef and he _is_ hungry. Mandy sits there and watches him as he devours the food. He knows he lied to her and she will be yelling at him as soon as he's better. He's just glad the confrontation will take place some other time.

“You lied to me.”

Or now.

Ian places his food on the table and sips on the home made passion juice.

“Why?” Mandy continues. “Why did you lie to me? We could have protected you. Gotten you out of there.” She takes a deep breath. “Why did you stay, Ian?”

Ian figures he might as well tell her the truth, he owes her that much. “He told me he loved me.”

Mandy slams her head on the back of the couch. “Of course he did.” Ian just drinks some more before reaching for his plate. “I should warn you, Fiona is on her way.”

Ian looks at her his eyes wide. “You called Fi?!”  He exclaims. “How the hell do you even have her number?”

“I fucked your brother that one time. I still have his number?”

“Dammit. She's going to be really mad. Why did you have to tell her anything?” for some reason everyone around him is so protective sometimes he feels more fragile than an egg.

“I didn’t.”

Okay, Ian has to put his food back on the table as he fully turns towards Mandy in disbelief. “Mickey, asked you to call her.”

“Yep.” Mandy reaches for his juice. “He's just trying to get into her good graces if you ask me.”

Just as Mickey steps out of his room fresh from a shower and fully dressed, someone starts ringing the bell unabatingly. “Can you please fucking get that?” he shouts at Mandy irritated by the noise.

Ian already knows that’s Fiona but he doesn’t tell them that. Instead he picks his plate back up and takes in Mickey discreetly. He offhandedly wonders if a time will come where the bad body will stop looking so God damn hot. He's in his signature leather jacket and black fitting jeans. He places a gun? On the table then pulls on his socks.

"Where is he? Where is my brother!" 

Before Ian can ask about the weapon, Fiona is rushing by his side.

“Oh Ian.” She grabs his face and takes in his injuries. Her face goes from sympathetic to hard in a span of seconds. She stands up straight and adjusts her blouse. “Damien. That’s his name?”

Ian nods at the same time Mandy replies. “Yes.”

Fiona looks at Mickey who's done wearing his shoes and is now tucking the gun in his belt. If Ian didn’t ache so badly he would so pounce on him. “What are we doing about this?”

“I'm headed over there. You coming?” Mickey asks already heading towards the door.

“Damn right I am.” Fiona replies angrily as she follows suit.

"You planning on killing him?" Ian shouts.

"Haven't decided yet. Will know when I get there!" Mickey shouts back as the door closes behind all three of them.

Soon Ian is in the living room, all by himself in the suddenly quiet apartment. “Well I'll be fine by myself, thanks for asking!” he shouts to no one. Sighing, he switches on the TV before going back to his food. “Don’ mind me. I'll just be here, alone, eating, while the people I love commit murder.”


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so many comments u guys. no pressure, huh? well, i hope i have nailed ur expectations.  
> a longer chapter because i kept you waiting! 
> 
> warning: violence. blood  
> but, you already know that. tihihihihihi

Mickey clearly remembers the exact apartment he saw the light come on but Mandy confirms with Ian anyway. So as soon as he parks the three of them practically jump out of the car. Fiona is the last one to get out as she searches for her bat under the seats.

“Let’s go!” she says already leading the way.

Mickey locks his car and they head inside the building. The elevator opens as soon as they press the ‘open’ button. Getting off on Damien’s floor, they head straight for the door. Fiona is about to knock when Mandy kicks it in. It gives easily. It sways a little on its hinges but Mickey stops it with his palm and they walk in.

There's no one home. But that’s okay, they can wait.

“Where do you think he is?” Fiona asks looking around the living room. She walks over to a flower pot and tilts it, getting satisfied when the soil lands on the cream carpet. She stomps on it for good measure.

Mickey shakes his head as he goes to the kitchen. “Proly went to work even after…” he shuts his eyes recalling the state Ian was in when he got into his bed in distress. “what he did.” He finishes sliding all the neatly arranged plates off their rack. He smirks as they shatter into pieces on the kitchen floor loudly.

Fiona hums from the doorway. “I'm beginning to like you Mickey.”

Mickey nods acknowledging what could be Fiona not hating him as much as she did anymore. He gestures at the tray of eggs and Fiona gives him an evil smile before going ahead and doing the necessary.

Mandy who heard the shattering noise comes into the kitchen and stares at the damage. She gasps in surprise but Mickey can see the twinkle in her eye. “We’re destroying this motherfucker’s house? Why did no one say so?”

“Ah-ah.” Mickey stops her with a tsk of his tongue. “You're supposed to be packing up Ian's shit, remember?”

Mandy pouts. “C’mon Mick, let me do something. Just one thing.” He rolls his eyes but waves her the go ahead. “Yes!” she exclaims grabbing Fiona’s bat.

“What are you doing with that?” Fiona asks and she and Mickey take off after her. “Noooo.” Fiona says, laughing.

Mandy nods wiggling her eyebrows. “Yes.” She positions herself in front of the flat screen TV, bat in hand. Mickey laughs before sitting on the arm of the chair, preparing to enjoy this. Mandy hits the TV with as much strength as she can master. Mickey bites his bottom lip and he takes in the hole inside the now destroyed TV.

“That’s fucking beautiful.” Mickey whispers. “But I think two more holes would be much better.”

“Yes sir!”

_Whack!_

 

 

                               **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

 

The two angry Milkoviches and one Gallagher are seated eating stuff they raided from the fridge. They are patient enough to wait till Damien gets back home. In the meantime, the guy’s house is in ruins. Everything the three of them could destroy, they did. It's gonna cost Damien and Mickey is all for that. Mandy already packed up Ian's things and placed the bag by the door. Now they're on the chairs lounging comfortably, waiting patiently and passing time till the asshole gets here.

Finally at around 4:00PM they hear a gasp but no one even bothers to sit up. Damien pushes open the door slowly and walks into his apartment. He gasps again when he sees them there. He quickly takes in the living room still in shock. The state of his TV however, is what spurs him into action.

He's got a fading bruise on his left eye and Mickey takes pride in the fact that at least Ian got a hit in.

“What do you want?” he asks the three intruders that are still seated comfortably in his seats.  He takes out his phone. “I'm calling the cops.”

Mandy jumps out of her chair without warning and takes the gadget off his hands. “I don’ think so.”

Damien looks at them confused.  “You are in the wrong fucking place, but rest assured you will be paying for all this damage.” He says looking around his apartment again. He swallows and bites his bottom lip angrily. “Who are you and what do you want!”

Fiona stands up too. “Hi, my name is Fiona Gallagher. You know, sister to Ian Gallagher.”

Damien’s eyes widen in realization. “Look, listen.”

Fiona crosses her arms, the bat still in her hands. “I'm listening.”

“You do not understand what transpired between us. He had that shit coming.”

Mickey is already angry, that wasn’t going away until Damien was taken care of. But hearing him say that… say that Ian had that beating coming. Ian who is so harmless, that sweet, sweet puppy who would never… he takes a deep breath and gets up.

“He had that shit coming?” he repeats angrily his blood boiling all over again. “He had that shit coming?”

“I am not afraid of you. Any of you.” Damien spits and Mickey can see it's the truth.

Mandy scoffs and chuckles bitterly. “You will be.”

“I was wrong to hit him, I know that. I do.” The asshole starts. “But-“ he doesn’t finish that sentence since Fiona lands a hit on his stomach with the bat.

Mickey concludes never to underestimate Fiona when Damien doubles over and falls to his knees. He coughs a couple of times but Mandy doesn’t give him a chance to catch his breath before she kicks him on his mouth. Damien curses loudly, grabbing onto his cheek. He spits a few drops of blood on his cream carpet.

“Three against one. Not fair.”

Mickey laughs. “Really? You fucking serious? You're dealing with Ian's sister and his best friend. I haven’t even done anything yet.” He thumbs his bottom lip.

“Ian… fuck!” Damien yells when Mandy kicks him again, hard in the exact same place. When he spits this time its blood and a tooth. She smirks, satisfied.

“Do not say his name.” she growls dangerously before standing up and staring at her feet. “Demn I love these boots.”

Mickey crouches in front  of the bleeding man. “By the time I'm done with you, you will wish you never met him. Never laid eyes on him. I will make you regret every arm you raised at him. Every punch you ever gave him. You. Will. Pay.” Mickey threatens.

“It is none of your business, what happens in our relationship is none of your fucking business.”

“If I were you I'd stop talking.”  Mandy offers the unsolicited advice.

“And you’d better start referring to your relationship in past tense too.” Fiona adds.

“Leave us.” Mickey tells them handing Mandy the car keys.

Fiona presses on Damien’s injured mouth with the bat and the other man cries out painfully as his entire face throbs painfully. The two ladies then walk out of the apartment with Ian's clothes in hand. They close the door behind them but it just opens again since they destroyed it.

“He's not really going to kill him, is he?” Fiona asks as the elevator doors close.

“Honestly, it could go either way at this point. Mickey is just so fucking mad.”

“Yeah, when Damien said Ian had it coming Mickey’s face was practically red.” Fiona says leaning against the wall. “He really cares, doesn’t he?”

Mandy nods. “He really does.”

“So why did he cheat?” Fiona opens the door to the back seat and gets in.

Mandy puts Ian's things in the trunk before getting in the front passenger seat. “Mickey was still learning at the time.” She explains. “Ian was his first boyfriend, he was bound to fuck up at some point.”

“You think he's ready now?”

Mandy nods earnestly. “I really do. Problem is, I don’t think _he_ knows that.”

Fiona situates herself comfortably in the back seat, lying down. “Maybe they’ll work it out after this?”

“Maybe.”

 

                               **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

 

“You love him.” Damien points out as he stands up. “I watched you two out there. I saw the way you…” he pauses to wince grabbing his ribs. “You love him.”

 “As a matter of fact I do.” At least he's admitted it to someone even if it's this dickward. Mickey takes off his jacket before placing the gun on the coffee table. The only thing in the house that is probably still intact. He watches Damien glance at the weapon and swallow.

“See? I was right to hit him. He broke a rule. We had talked about this. Ask Ian, he knows.” Damien explains desperately.

Mickey is in a black tank top now and he takes in Damien as he tries to justify his despicable actions. “He's such a good fucking person.”

“I know that.”

“He has the biggest heart.”

“I know that too.”

“That puppy would never do anything to hurt anyone and you took advantage of that.”

Damien shakes his head, his back against the wall. “It wasn’t like that. I was teaching him a lesson. Come on man.”

Mickey spits on the carpet. “You seem pretty scared to me.”

“I don’t know what you're about to do with that gun.”

“I'm about to teach you a fucking lesson.” Mickey shrugs. “You know. Like you taught Ian?”

“Please, don’t kill me.”

Mickey thumbs his nose. “From where I'm standing, only one side of your face is bleeding and swollen. Think it's only fair if I take care of this other side, don’t you?”

“Wait-“

Mickey lands two simultaneous punches on Damien’s stomach that drop him to the ground again. The guys growls and pushes Mickey hard till he stumbles towards the couch. The latter groans angrily and reaches for his gun. Damien sits back on his heels his eyes full of fear. Mickey pistol whips him once on his nose –relishing in the sound it makes as it breaks- the other on his forehead. The exact same place Ian's spotting an angry bruise right now.

Damien is moaning and groaning in agony. He's bleeding profusely from his nose and holding onto it. The front of his grey dress shirt is black now, stained with the heavy amount of blood leaving him. Mickey stands up  straight and tilts his head left and right, taking Damien in.

He is breathing hard, still extremely angry and he doesn’t know if the damage he's done so far is enough.

“I'm…so..sorry.” Damien stammers out. “Tell him, tell him.”

Him.

Ian.

Ian who came home at night crying and bleeding because of what this fucker had done to him and not for the first time. With that memory Mickey decides that no, he hasn’t done enough damage. He punches Damien over and over and over again on his bloody face. He glances at the gun in his hand. When he came here he had the intention to shoot the guy, but Ian wouldn’t want him to do that.

And Mickey wants to be around Ian so he would rather avoid jail.

“Take out your phone.”  He commands and Damien does so with difficulty. “Call 911.”

After the call has been made Mickey crouches to Damien’s level again. “I'm sparing your life because despite what you did, death is not Ian's wish for you. Our finger prints are all over this apartment no doubt. Umm,” he sniffs. “I don’ care what you say but if the cops come looking for us, for me? You’re dead fucking meat.”

Damien nods quickly. “You don’ have to threaten me, I get it.”

His face is barely visible and Mickey sneers at him with a grimace. “Damien, I don’t threaten. That was a fucking promise.”

“Okay, okay, okay. I got it.”

“Good.”

He hits the older man on his face with the gun again and it's lights out for Damien.

 

                               **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

 

“How did it go?” Mandy asks as her brother gets in the car. She then takes in the bloody gun and shakes her head. “Never mind.” She grabs some wipes and gives them to Mickey.

As they're driving back to the apartment they cross paths with the ambulance. “I take it he's alive?” Fiona asks as the loud cars drive by. Mickey doesn’t reply but she already knows the answer. “Drop me off here. Tell Ian I'll call him.” she says waving around her phone to show them she's needed by her other siblings. “That was fun. Call me next time.”

Mandy laughs as Fiona gets out. “I will!”

Mickey shakes his head. “There won't be a next fucking time.” He breathes. “I won't let it.” He adds lowly almost to himself but Mandy hears him.  

 


	30. Chapter 30

The drive back home Mickey can't help but feel guilty. Ian gets hurt when they're together and when they're not. He can't help but feel responsible somehow. Ian only started dating Damien because Mickey couldn’t commit, couldn’t tell him what he needed to hear. Granted he didn’t feel it at the time but still.  And even though Mickey knows he loves Ian now, there is still the underlying fear of hurting him again. Sure he wouldn’t cheat on Ian, but there are a million other ways he could end up making Ian cry again.

And that makes Mickey hesitate. He wants to profess his love for Ian. Wants to make sure Ian never dates anyone else so he never gets hurt again. But he doesn’t trust himself not to hurt Ian. Mickey's wish is for Ian to never hurt ever again. Be it physically or emotionally. He wants to see that freckled smile on Ian always, wants him happy always. But is he the best person for that?

Is he the man to give Ian the love and happiness he deserves?

The fact that Mickey can't answer that question, is the reason he can't tell Ian that he loves him, at least not yet.

.

When they open the door to the apartment they find Ian pacing while chewing on the arm of Mickey's sweater. A wave of warmth hits Mickey at the sight of Ian in his sweater. Even if he's ruining one of the arms. The redhead sees them and he gasps before exhaling loudly in relief. Mickey opens his arms wide and Ian eagerly runs into his embrace. The brunette hugs him tightly against his chest and exhales heavily.

“It's okay. Everything is fine, he'll never hurt you again.”

Ian shuts his eyes tightly and nods. Happy to hear that but also happy to have them back safe and sound. He pulls away to grab Mandy and hug her too. “I am so happy you guys are home, you were gone for the entire day and I was so worried.” He then frowns, worried and turns to Mickey. “He's not going to call the cops on you, right?”

Mickey shakes his head. “No.”

Ian nods, taking in the information. “Good. Good.”

He leads the way to Mickey's bedroom with the latter right behind him.   
Mandy watches them leave and wonders if they will finally fix things. Her best bet though is that Mickey won't be able to confess his feelings and it might be too soon for Ian to date again. Either way Damien has been taken care of and all is right with the world again. She takes a seat on the couch, settling in. It had been a long day.

 

                               **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

 

There is safe inside Mickey's closet so he puts back the gun. Ian gets under the covers and watches Mickey lock the safe and take off his jacket and shoes. He will never get over how much Mickey cares about him. He beat down Damien on his behalf, held Ian when he was in distress, he's always there for him. Every single time they interact Ian falls harder. And he knows it's wrong of him to think that. He was in a relationship after all, but it's the truth. Ian knows for a fact he was never in love with Damien. He loved _the_ _idea_ of him sure, but he never gave that man his heart. Not when it already belonged to someone else. The hot as fuck bad boy taking off his jeans so he can get in bed beside him.

“You know how weird this is, right?” Mickey questions as he settles in and Ian lies on his chest.

“This will never be weird when it comes to us.” Ian says with a smile when Mickey starts to softly caress his back. He's however hit with a moment of insecurity. He lifts his head to look at Mickey. “Unless it's making you weird? I could go to the guest room.” He starts pulling away but Mickey’s hold on his back tightens.

“It's not. You're right.” Mickey assures. “This will never be weird between us.”

Ian smiles happily and settles back on Mickey's comfortable chest. He traces invisible patterns on Mickey's vest and licks his lips preparing to voice his thoughts. “I hope I am not being inconvenient.” He says softly.

“Why would you be?” Mickey asks just as quietly. He frowns at the top of Ian's head. Maybe it's the bruising but he could swear Ian is blushing.

“I mean, you could be on a date with Omar right now.” Ian starts. “And here I am taking up your time.”

Mickey smiles and bites on his bottom lip. “Really Ian?”

Ian lifts his head too fast and winces. Mickey caresses his cheek to try and ease away some of the pain. “You took his number. You clearly liked him back.”

Mickey shakes his head in amusement even as he finds Ian's jealousy so endearing. “I was never gonna call him, Ian.”

“You weren’t?”

“No.”

Ian narrows his eyes at Mickey. “Why? He is cute, nice, polite.” Mickey snorts. “What?”

“Are you vouching for him? Encouraging me to call him? Okay.” Mickey reaches for his phone on the nightstand but Ian stops him.

“No!” Ian says grabbing Mickey's hand. “I'm just curious.”

Mickey shrugs. “I wasn’t feeling him like that. Deleted his number as soon as we left.”

Ian nods happily and lies on Mickey's chest again to hide his pleased smile.

They lie there in silence. Mickey staring at the ceiling and caressing Ian's back and hair comfortingly. He’s happy to have the redhead safe in his arms.

Ian continues to trace invisible patterns on Mickey's clothed chest. He can't think of anywhere else he’d rather be at this moment. He baffles at how safe Mickey makes him feel. How happy and content. If only they would have worked out. Ian would have preferred not have dated anybody else at all. He would prefer to not have to date anyone else ever again. But Mickey… Mickey is complicated. At least they're still friends. Great friends. Ian likes to pretend in his head that Mickey is in love with him too. It’s not that hard considering how the bad boy treats him and how much he cares about him.

He is just grateful they're still in each other’s lives.

“ I’m glad u didn’t kill him.” Ian says, suddenly breaking the comfortable silence.

Mickey caresses Ian's hair and kisses the top of his head sweetly. “I knew you didn’t want the fucker dead.”

Ian leans on his elbow and looks up so they're staring into each other’s eyes. “It's not about that. I could care less what happens to that asshole.” He licks his lips. “I am glad you didn’t kill him because you getting arrested means I wouldn't get to do this anymore.” Ian places his head back on Mickey's chest and hugs him tightly. He then takes places his nose on Mickey's warm neck and inhales deeply making Mickey laugh.

“Fucking puppy.”

Ian just smiles happily and nuzzles even closer.  


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uuugh u guys. It's election day over here and we have our own trump. He really sucks ass and people are really hoping he doesn't win.  
> Guess we're gonna have to wait n c. 
> 
> Enjoy!

A week later Ian's bruises have faded somewhat. They're not as bad as they were and Mickey can look at him without wanting to go back, find Damien and kill him. The red head wakes up early Friday morning and makes the rest breakfast. 

Ian chews on his pancake bite staring at Mickey. He swallows, sips his tea and clears his throat. "Think I'm ready to go back to work now." 

Mickey looks up sharply. "No." 

"Mick, i can't just stay here doing nothing. Plus I'm better." 

Mickey sits up shaking his head. "I don' got a problem with you going back to work. I just don' want you going back there." 

Ian frowns confused. "He's not the one who owns the company, it's his..." 

"Don' matter." Mickey interrupts. 

Ian sighs and gets up. He goes to Mickey's bedroom and dresses. He's walking past the siblings towards the door when they both stop him. 

"Ian." They chorus. 

"I'm going to work." 

"Ian, you don't know what he's told his brother. You don't know if they plan on making your life there, a living hell." Mandy tries to reason with him. 

"Well, let's find out." Ian walks out closing the door behind him. 

Mickey slams both hands on the table. "He's too fucking stubborn." 

Mandy scoffs. "Like you're not." 

Mickey huffs and reaches for his phone. **At least let me know if you need me.**

**Of course. Thanks Mick. :)**

 

                               **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

When Ian gets to work, he's suprised to find someone else at his desk. "Excuse me, who are you?" 

The guy looks up. "Huh?" 

"This is my desk." 

"No it's not." 

"Umm, Ian?" Dave his coworker and friend calls him and Ian walks towards his desk. "That's your replacement." 

"What the fuck! Why?" Dave shrugs. "I talked to them, told them I was sick and they were okay with me missing work for a week." 

Dave shrugs again. "I don't know Ian. But here," he hands Ian a box containing his stuff. "They wanted to throw them out but I kept them for you." 

Ian shuts his eyes trying to get control of his breathing. "Thanks Dave." He grabs the box and heads up to HR. He knocks once on the door before walking in. Moses is on the phone and he frowns at him. 

"Let me call you back." He hangs up then turns to Ian. "Mr. Gallagher, what are you doing here?" 

"I'm getting fired?" 

"You already got fired." Moses offers patiently. 

"Why?" Ian places his box on top of the man's desk. "I want to know." 

Moses grabs a book from his drawer and goes through it. "Oh, here it is. You took off work for an entire week. We don't condone that here." 

Ian runs a hand across his hair in frustration. "You guys said it was okay when I explained my situation." 

Moses looks at him apologetically and gestures with his hands. "Sorry man, boss' orders." 

Ian groans and leaves Moses' office getting into the elevator angrily. When he walks out he puts his items on top of one of the cars outside the building and calls his ex. He picks up on the sixth ring. "Really Damien? You got me fucking fired?" 

"You got me fucking beat up." 

"After _you_ beat _me_ up!" Silence. "You're a grown ass man, can't believe you would stoop this fucking low!" 

"Should have thought of that before you sent your goon over." 

Ian is about to retort when Damien hangs up. He yells in frustration at the empty parking lot. Ian picks up his box and goes to the bus stop. He's jobless, again. Great. 

 

                               **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

When he gets home, Ian spends the day eating ice cream and binge watching _Blacklist_. He can't wait for Mickey to get home. Fuck, he needs him so bad. He licks and sucks on the spoon, relishes in the sweetness on his tongue. Ian checks his phone again and it's fifteen more minutes before Mickey walks in through the door.  

He places the container on the table and goes to Mandy's texts then sends one. **Come home late. Please.**

**It's your lucky day, spending the weekend with bae.**

Ian smiles and reaches for his ice cream again. His phone chimes and Ian checks the additional text from Mandy. 

**Please don' fuck on the couch.**

Ian laughs but doesn't reply. Instead the request makes the idea more enticing and he goes to Mickey's room to grab the lube. He takes off his jacket,  trouser and underwear before kneeling on the bed. Ian squeezes a small amount on his right hand and warms it up a bit. He then leans forward and reaches back so he can work himself open. He shuts his eyes and bites his bottom lip when he imagines Mickey's dick inside him instead of his long fingers. 

"Fuuuuuck." He whispers when he brushes against his prostate. 

It feels good to get to do this after all this while. He needs Mickey and he needs him now. He puts two fingers in and scissors himself open. Adding more lube on his fingers, he reaches inside his hole one last time to make sure he's ready and wet. He is. 

"Mmmm." 

Ian hums and grabs his underwear. He then changes his mind and just puts on the trouser. Yeah, now he's ready. He pulls his jacket back on and heads back to the living room. 

Ian sits back on the couch with a grin he can't seem to get rid of. Mickey's going to be taken by surprise for sure. Ian hadn't even given off vibes about wanting to have sex. They hadn't talked about it. But Ian needs Mickey, wants him. The other man always knows how to turn him out, always knows how to take care of him. And Ian needs that now. 

He hears the lock turn and he shoots up. He kneels on the couch and faces the door. Mickey walks in and gives Ian a confused smile. 

"Hi." 

"Hey!" Ian replies excitedly already getting hard. 

Mickey slowly takes off his jacket, narrowing his eyes at Ian. "You're in a good mood." 

"I am." Ian confirms. 

"So work was good?" Mickey asks walking towards the couch. 

"Nope. They fired me. Been here all day eating ice cream." Ian replies with a grin rendering Mickey even more confused. 

Mickey chuckles and thumbs his bottom lip before walking around the couch. Ian sits down and waits for Mickey to join him. "I'm confused." Mickey admits. Ian bites his bottom lip and straddles Mickey. "What's going on?" 

"Kiss me." 

Mickey holds the back of his neck and pulls Ian down for the kiss he's craved for months now. Ian kisses back in kind, shamelessly asking for more. Hard, urgent and demanding. 

"Yes, yes." Ian moans already undoing Mickey's top buttons. 

Mickey trembles at the first touch of Ian's fingers on his bare chest. He gasps when the redhead grazes his nipple. 

"Ian." Mickey moans between kisses. "Do you want to... bed?" He asks breathing heavily and feeling like every nerve of his body is alive. Like hot blood is running through him, begging for more of Ian's touch. Fuck, he's hard.

"No." Ian says. But before Mickey has time to worry about that, Ian continues. "Here. Take me right here Mick." He demands, eyes hot with desire. 

"Fuck." Mickey kisses him again furiously, undressing as much of Ian as he can without moving them from their current position. 

Ian is distracting him, grinding and rocking his hardness against Mickey's own. Ian's jacket falls to the floor and Mickey is almost done unbuttoning his shirt when Ian groans impatiently and kisses him again. Fuck, why is Ian so fucking horny? Not that Mickey's complaining. 

So Mickey pulls back from the kiss and rips the last of Ian's shirt. Buttons scatter all over the carpet and Ian laughs, emitting a bright joyous sound.

The redhead gets off Mickey's lap and commands, "Off." Then proceeds to take off his own trouser.

"Jesus Christ Ian." Mickey moans when he sees Ian's big cock spring free. He's got no underwear. 

"Off!" Ian shouts again and Mickey obediently takes off his own trouser and boxers. He glaces at Ian's dick again and even though he's always been a top, for a second he thinks about wanting that thick stick inside him. "Mickeeeey." Ian pouts and Mickey looks up at him. 

"Sorry." Mickey kicks away his trouser and Ian is quick to situate himself on his lap again. They start making out again, slowly this time, hands caressing each other's cheeks and neck. Ian lifts up and grabs Mickey's dick about to sit on it. "Ian." 

Ian pecks him. "Always used a condom with him." He assures. "He wasn't you." 

Mickey's heart swoons. He looks up at Ian and bites his lip. "Okay. Good. But i was gonna say I know your fucking horny but you gotta let me prep you." Ian sinks down in one quick sweep and Mickey cries out. "Fuuuuuuck!" 

"Already took care of that." Ian whispers in his ear as he starts moving his hips. "Fuck I missed you Mickey." 

"Me too. Me t... _Shit_." 

Ian slaps him on the chest once. Twice. Thrice and Mickey grabs his hands laughing. "Really!" 

"I'm sorry!" Mickey apologises in the midst of his laughter. 

"Are you fucking shitting me?! Do you know how fucking horny I am!" 

Mickey bites his bottom lip, his eyes apologetic. "I'm sorry puppy. But I haven't had sex in a long ass while, and then I come home and you're all keyed up, you got no underwear, you'd fucking prepped...this was inevitable!" Mickey explains himself. He pulls Ian to his chest. "I'm sorry." 

Ian kisses his neck. "It's fine. Gonna take it as a compliment." He says kissing Mickey for a few seconds. "But I'm not moving until you get hard again. And you better fucking last on round two!" 

Mickey nods. "I promise." 

He kisses Ian again and they start making out again. It's sweet and soft and Mickey's chest constricts with emotion. Ian tags at his nipples as they kiss and Mickey carresses his ass. Within minutes he can feel himself hardening again. 

"There we go." Ian who's still hard moans already grinding. 

Mickey holds Ian by his waist and ass then stands up. Some cum trickles out Ian from movement. He walks them towards his room and Ian keeps moaning with every step he takes. He kneels on the bed careful not to separate them. As soon as Ian is on his back Mickey is pummeling into him hard, giving him exactly what he needs. 

Shit, Ian can't remember being this loud. 

 

                               **< >°<>°<>°<>°<>**

 

         Mickey gets up needing to pee, badly. It's still dark and he doesn't want to wake Ian so he doesn't switch on the light until he gets to the bathroom. He empties his bladder and flushes before heading back to bed. Fuck, he feels so good. He feels lighter. He had forgotten that Ian was one crazy motherfucker in the sack.

He had needed that. 

Mickey gets back in bed and gets under the covers. He scoots towards the wall to he can touch and hold Ian. Except, there is no Ian. He feels around the bed, but nothing. Mickey quickly switches on the lights and he's indeed alone in bed. His heart beating erratically as he panics, he rushes out his room still naked to look for Ian. 

.

Mickey drops on the coach, resigned. Why did Ian leave? In the middle of the night no less. He pushes at the newspaper on the coffee table angrily till it lands on the floor. He leans his elbows on his knees and drops his face in his hands, trying to calm down. Trying to get rid of the ache in his chest.

Ian ran and Mickey needs to know why. 


	32. Chapter 32

Mickey can't wait till morning. He needs to find out what the fuck is going on right now. So he dresses and goes downstairs to the parking garage. He sighs heavily as he starts the car. The night is really quiet and Mickey can't help but wonder what he did wrong. The love making had been intense and really fucking emotional. Mickey has never experienced anything like that before in his life. They way they'd moved wasn't like those other times, it had been more. 

They'd held each other tighter, not wanting to have any space between them. They'd stared into each other's eyes as pleasure coursed though them. Ian was beautiful and Mickey wanted to be lost in that moment forever. The way he'd parted his thin pink lips as he moaned Mickey's name, the way he'd held on tight like he also wanted to stay in that moment forever. 

That sex was the best one they've ever had and for Ian to take off like this, didn't make any sense at all to Mickey. He hoped it hadn't been too much for the puppy. They weren't together and they still had feelings for each other clearly but Mickey hoped it hadn't been too much for him.  

He parks the car and switches off the ignition. He checks the time and it's 4:30AM. Fiona will kill him.  

Mickey steps out of the car, locks it and heads towards the house. Ian's phone is off so he's going to have to knock. A few minutes later it's Ian by the door. His eyes open wide in shock. 

"Mickey?" He whispers his voice shakey so he clears his throat. "Mick, what are you doing here?" 

"Really?" 

Ian sighs and steps aside so Mickey can walk through. 

"You smell like beer." Mickey points out before dropping on the couch where some movie is playing with the volume off. 

"I couldn't sleep." Ian says then walks past Mickey. He heads to the kitchen and comes back with two beers. Handing Mickey one, he sits next to him. "Thought I'd have till morning before you realized I was missing." 

"Had to pee." 

"Dammit." 

"Ian." 

Ian runs a hand across his hair with another sigh. He then places a hand on Mickey's cheek and tries to kiss him but the latter pulls away. 

"Ian." 

Ian chuckles lightly. "I had to try. You've avoided conversation with sex before." 

Mickey remembers. He sips his beer thoughtfully. That was before, he's in too deep now. They need to talk first. "Why did you run?" 

Ian drinks some more of his beer then burps. "I..." Shit. How is he going to put this? 

He still loves Mickey, that much is obvious. And fucking the bad boy -who's he kidding, they most definitely made love- had reminded him just how much he needed the other man in his life. When Mickey was inside him it was like they never broke up. It was like no time had passed at all. They were so insinq and so good together. Ian wanted that and so much more. He had gotten overwhelmed by the emotions that act had brought inside him.  

It had been beautiful. 

But then they had climaxed and Mickey had passed out, giving Ian a chance to think. Ian loved Mickey, yes. That wasn't the issue. But he had just come from a relationship where he was the punching bag. Then there's the fact that when Ian and Mickey were together Mickey cheated on him, hurt him. Add that to the fact that Mickey doesn't love him, and Ian couldn't sleep a wink. He was swimming in trust issues galore and felt the need to protect himself. 

It was all too much. Because even though he needed to protect himself, he craved Mickey more than he'd ever wanted anything his whole life. And even though Mickey had been right there next to him, Ian didn't really have him. So the redhead had found himself dressing up and calling for a uber, not wanting to be next to the bad boy for another second. It hurt too much. 

And now here Mickey is needing an explanation. But the explanation is so fucking messy so Ian goes with, "It's too soon." 

"What? The sex?" Mickey frowns. 

"Everything. I just came out of a fucked up relationship, it's too soon." Technically its not a lie. It's just one of the reasons. 

Mickey runs a hand across his hair. He supposes that makes sense. It hasn't even been two weeks. "I guess." 

"I mean what happened tonight, Damn." Ian curses making Mickey laugh. "That was...definitely one for the books Mick."

"I know." Mickey says laughing and nodding in agreement. It was too soon. Ian was right. He had just come out of a relationship. It wasn't the right time to have sex, and it certainly wasn't the right time to tell Ian how he feels. 

He can wait. They can wait. 

 

                                        **℅**

 

Ian and Mickey sit there talking for hours. Before they know it the sun is up. They both come to the conclusion that they need to stick to friendship because it is too soon for Ian to be moving on. 

Truth be told, it may only be two weeks but Ian is over that abuser. But with his trust issues and the fact that he's the only one in love between them, Ian let's Mickey think that's the only reason they're sticking to being friends. 

"You want some coffee or you gonna keep going with the beer?" Ian smirks. 

"How are you not drunk yet?" Ian grins but it dies down until it's just a small lingering smile. "What?" Mickey inquires. 

"I just," Ian sniffs. "I just wish we were on the same page." He says making Mickey frown. "Then we wouldn't have to be just friends and I wouldn't have to date anyone else." Ian takes Mickey's hand and squeezes it. 

Mickey suddenly feels like he's sweating. "Ian what... You said it was too soon." 

Ian tilts his head and gives Mickey an intense look that makes him shudder. "I love you Mickey."

"You dated Damien for months."

"I didn't love him." 

Mickey scoots closer and cups Ian's cheeks. "Ian, what are you saying?" 

Ian licks his lips and glances at Mickey's own. He then looks back up into Mickey's blues. "I m saying you don't love me back." 

This is it. This is what's holding Ian back? It's not just that it's too soon but because he thinks Mickey still doesn't love him. Mickey opens his mouth to return the sentiment when, 

"Ian! Your bed hasn't been slept on!" Fiona shouts as her loud footsteps come down the stairs. 

Ian pulls back from Mickey and stands up, straightening his shirt. There's a terrible pain in his chest that refuses to go away and he has to pinch himself so he doesn't cry. He faces away from Mickey to hide his emotions. He already knew Mickey doesn't love him but confirming the fact for a second time hurts even more than the first time.

"Ian?" Fiona calls walking into the living room. That's when she spots Mickey. "Oh. Hi Mickey." 

"Hi Fiona." Mickey says standing up. He wants to touch Ian and turn him around and tell him just how much he loves him too. How he has for a long time now. But the moment has passed. 

Mickey promises himself that he will do it soon. 

"Stay for pancakes. Ian may have mentioned once banana are your favorite." She smiles and walks into the kitchen. 

Maybe if he stays he'll get a chance to talk to Ian again. He's about to accept the offer when his phone goes off. "Shit." He curses quietly. "Look I umm, I gotta go." He waves his phone. "Work." 

"Oh, that's too bad." Fiona yells from the kitchen. 

Mickey looks at Ian who's still facing away from him. "I'll call you, Ian?" 

 "Yeah, okay." 

Ian doesn't even look at him when he runs up the stairs. Mickey just swallows the lump in his throat as his phone rings again. 

 


	33. Chapter 33

Of course Mickey leaves for a week because of work. But he somehow still manages to get Ian a job while away. It's on Sunday evening when Ian gets a call that he needs to show up for an interview first thing Monday morning. Just when he's about to rack his brain because he didn't drop his papers at this particular company, he gets a text from Mickey.

**I know you're mad at me but please don't fail to show up for this interview because of me. Please.**

**I am not mad, Mickey.** Ian replies. It's true. He can never stay mad at Mickey, his heart won't allow him. His anger had left him the moment he'd banged his door closed behind him the night before. Besides, storming away childishly when Fiona showed up is probably one of the reasons why Mickey won't love him. So to sound mature he adds; **I would never throw away a job opportunity because of our personal rlship.**

 **Good.** Is the reply he gets. **Will be coming back on Thursday night. See you for breakfast Friday?**

**You got it**

Ian replies, unaware that he had just made Mickey very happy two towns away.

 

                                            **℅**

 

Ian anxiously awaits Friday morning and when it comes he can't get out of the house fast enough. He rushes towards the cafe near his new job. They arrive at the same time. Ian and Mickey exchange their usual tight and long hug by the cafe entrance. Ian buries his face in the brunette's neck and takes a deep breath, the older man smells like heaven.  He pulls back to take Mickey in and he's dressed in a blue tight T-shirt and black jeans. His leather jacket is brown today. 

Ian beams at him. "You look good."

"So do you." Mickey whispers. 

Ian chuckles as they walk towards the counter where there's a long line already. "Hi." Ian replies sheepishly making Mickey laugh. "You can get us a table while I get the coffee." Ian suggests. 

"Okay." Mickey nods and looks at him one more time before walking away. 

Ian doesn't take his eyes off Mickey's ass till he hears someone clear his throat behind him. Ian turns around to find a tall guy with dirty blond hair smirking at him. 

"Please I get it," the stranger looks at Mickey where he's settling on the table by the window. "If he was my guy I'd never take my eyes off that ass either." 

Ian can feel his face go warm and he knows he's blushing. "No, no he's not my boyfriend." 

"Oh!" The guy exclaims, brown eyes wide. He then extends a hand for Ian to shake. "I that case, I'm Jordan." 

 Ian shakes the offered hand. "Aaah, Ian." 

 

                                            **℅**

 

Mickey stops looking out the window to look at Ian. He does a double take when he sees Ian talking to a stranger. Mickey frowns hard at the guy's body language. Next thing he sees the blond hands Ian his phone and Ian takes it! Ian is putting in his number!

Mickeys grabs the bottom of his chair so hard it hurts. It's Ian's turn to give his order then he steps aside so stupid blond asshole can do the same. Mickey grimaces when they smile at each other. There's no way anyone is taking _his_ Ian away from him. Never again. Over his dead fucking body! 

They both get their orders at the same time and Ian walks towards him while blond asshole heads out the cafe. Mickey is right on his heels. 

"Mick, Mick. Mick!" Ian calls when he sees who Mickey is following. "Shit." He curses before rushing towards their table and placing the coffees on it. He then follows the two men outside. 

.

Mickey grabs the guy roughly by the elbow and directs him towards an empty table.  "What tha..." The guy starts. 

"Sit." Mickey commands. The guy, knowing what's good for him obeys. "Your fucking phone. Give it." 

"You can't just rob me in plain sight." 

Mickey bends down so he's practically breathing on the guy's face. "Give. Me. Your. Phone." He repeats dangerously. "Make me say it again and I'll leave with your arm too." He lifts his jacket to expose the silver knife by his belt.

The guy swallows and hands it over. Mickey points the screen towards the blond asshole so he can input his pattern which he does with shaky hands. Mickey goes straight to contacts.  

"You save him as Ian?" 

"Yeah." Blond asshole nods. 

Mickey sees two Ians and deletes them both not giving a fuck. He then slaps the phone on he guy's chest and turns around only to bump into a shocked Ian. 

"Mick, what the fuck?!" Ian asks even as his dick throbs in his pants. Fuck, that was hot. 

Mickey grabs him by his elbow, only more gentle than he did with Jordan and they head back to their table. Mickey pulls back his chair for him and Ian takes it. "That was harrassment." 

Mickey sits down and rolls his eyes. "He had it coming, hitting on you." 

Ian opens and closes his mouth but ends up not knowing what to say. 

"Drink your coffee before it gets cold." Mickey suggests lifting his own. When Ian doesn't he sighs. "You just broke up with Damien. It's too soon." 

"I..." Ian starts but instead sips his coffee. "This had nothing to do with that. You were jealous." 

Mickey smiles avoiding Ian's eyes. "'Course I was." He admits softly and Ian smiles in satisfaction. "How is work so far?" 

Ian smiles harder. "It's good. Really good. I really like it there Mick, thank you." 

Mickey nods. "You need anything just let me know. Anyone gives you a hard time, let me know." 

"What will you do? You don' even work there." 

Mickey shrugs. "Don' matter. I always got you." 

Ian's cheeks n neck turn pick and he takes a sip of his coffee to hide his deep blush. "You're always so good to me." He says shyly and Mickey's heart swells.  "What if I had failed the interview? Huh? What then?" Ian perks up again. 

Mickey shakes his head as always amused by the sweet redhead. "Listen puppy, that job was yours, regardless of how the interview went." 

Ian gasps before narrowing his eyes at Mickey and pouting adorably. "I stayed up all night for nothing?" He asks before throwing his napkin at Mickey. "I could have gone in there, sang the alphabet and still gotten the job." 

Mickey nods. "I'll always take care of you Ian." 

Ian had an insult ready but that was so sweet he forgets what he wanted to say. He peels the label of his cup and licks his lips. "So what's the plan? Are you always going to cock block me?" 

That is the plan, yes. "I got a cock right here Gallagher. No one's blocking this." He gestures at his crotch with his chin. 

Ian bites his bottom lip. "How come you never dated anyone before me?" Ian brings up a topic that takes Mickey completely by surprise. 

Mickey leans back and drains his coffee. "Before you I was horrible." He says then frowns. "I suppose I still could be depending on the circumstance." 

"You're amazing Mick." 

Mickey shakes his head. "I didn't think anyone could ever want me that way until you showed me." 

Mickey Milkovich insecure? No way. Ian takes his hand. "This will surprise you but, falling in love with you wasn't that hard." 

Mickey's stomach flips and he can feel his tear ducts are about to start acting up to he quickly changes the topic. "Aren't you horny? It's been a week." 

Ian remembers this part of their little game. He also notices this is Mickey changing the topic but he allows it. The man is not used to vulnerability. 

Ian let's go of his hand but Mickey's palm still feels hot. He watches the redhead intently and he can literally feel his heart grow bigger at the sight of a smiling Ian. After Damien, Mickey had decided no one would ever hurt Ian again. He will protect him from heartache, violence and whatever else comes with relationships.

So it makes sense if he never let's Ian date again, right? 

 


	34. Chapter 34

Ian laughs and stares at his best friend like she's crazy. “Are you serious?”

Mandy bites on a piece of orange and nods her head. “Yeah. Don’t forget the salt.”

Ian follows the order still shaking his head in disbelief. “You are unbelievable.”

“I hate surprises.”

“It was a proposal!” Ian turns around to look at her. He stirs the soup he's making and sips on it. He moans in satisfaction at his own cooking. He’s making dinner today and Mandy is supervising him. She also turned down a proposal –like the  idiot she is- from her long term boyfriend because he didn’t tell her he was going to propose.

“I don’ care. If he really knew me he shouldn’t have sprang that on me.” She laments. “And in the middle of a restaurant no less!”

“Fucking crazy.” Ian accuses as they both laugh.

“Would you do it?” Mandy asks going to the fridge to pour herself some more white wine.

“Would I do what?”

“Get married.” Ian shrugs. “To Mickey?”

“In a heartbeat.” He replies so fast Mandy laughs before she swallows and ends up choking. He taps her back gently with a wide smile of his own. “Watch it.”

“Well,” Mandy sits back down on the single chair at a corner in the kitchen. “I'll be happy to bake the cake. And cook the food. For free.”

Ian shakes his head. “Sound likes a lot of work but lucky for you that’s never gonna happen.”

Mandy scoffs. “Sure it will.”

Ian puts a lead on the soup and peaks into the oven. “The turkey’s almost ready.”

“Ian.”

Ian sighs and crosses his arms looking at her. “He doesn’t love me Mands.” He tells her sadly. “I don know why,” he inhales sharply. “I'm a lovable dude, right? I have lovable qualities?”

Mandy puts her wine on the ceramic countertop and walks towards her best friend. “You are the most lovable person I know.” she comforts pulling him into a hug.

Ian sighs into her neck. “I mean, I know he has _feelings_ for me. He cares. Just not the way I want him to.”  

Mandy hates the situation Mickey is putting them in so much. She pulls back and looks up at Ian. “Ian, listen,” she starts knowing it's not her place to say this but she's tired of watching this two go round in circles. “He loves you. Mick. Mickey loves you Ian.” She says. “And not just as a friend either he…” Ian's eyes are open wide in a mixture of shock and amusement. But they're not directed at her. He's looking past her and towards the main door. Mandy turns around and rolls her eyes. She could have told Ian Frank the cockroach died and he wouldn’t have heard her. Mickey just walked in soaked from head to toe. He's wearing a thin white t-shirt so…

“Hey Mick.” Ian says breathlessly, his eyes not leaving Mickey's visible nipples. He can feel as his dick erects inch by inch. “So it's umm… it's raining outside?” he asks then visibly swallows.

Mandy can practically feel the sexual tension in the air. If Ian doesn’t leave the kitchen right this minute she will suffocate for sure. Luckily she only has to mentally count to ten. Before,

Ian rushes towards the door and Mickey smirks at him, he is fully prepared for the redhead when he throws his arms around his neck kissing him fervently. They don’t stop making out as they head blindly towards Mickey's room.

Mandy sighs in frustration. “Ian, you were cooking!”

Silence.

How does their relationship even work? Are they friends with benefits? What the fuck even is this? She sighs and checks on the soup before switching off the gas. Mutual pining for sure.   
Mandy grabs the entire bottle and walks out into the balcony when she hears; _harder Mickey!_ And _right there Mick!_ She really doesn’t need their bullshit, it's either they're together or they're not.

Morons.

                                            **℅**

 

Ian and Scott from work are hanging out in the break room. They're the only ones. Their work is done for the day so they don’t need to rush back to their offices like the rest. Ian sneers at the chicken stew on his plate but takes a bite anyway.

Scott scoffs. “What, are you used to better?”

Ian nods. “As a matter of fact yes, my best friend is a chef?”

Scott laughs. “Okay then, my bad.” He lifts his hands in mock surrender. Scott is the closest thing to a friend he has at this place. They hang out during the lunch hours he's not meeting with Mickey. “Not meeting with Mickey today?”

Ian shakes his head and sips from his bottle of sprite. “No, he's away but is coming back the day after tomorrow.”

Scott nods. “Cool, and you say he's not your boyfriend?”

“He's something. Just not that, no.”

“But you want him to be more.”

Ian sighs forlornly. “He is sweet and amazing and incredible. He is perfect.”

Scott laughs shaking his head. “I don’t get it. I will never understand why the world works like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like the ones we want don’t want us, and the one we don’t want are the ones that do.”

Ian frowns staring at his food that he knows by this point he won't finish. “He wants me.”

“Then why hasn’t he locked you down yet?”

“It's complicated.” Ian defends.

“Is it?” Scott tilts his head. “Because in my experience it never is. If you would agree to date me I'd more than date you, I would marry you for sure.”

Ian laughs. “Marry me?”

“Yeah!” the  brunette laughs too. “You are tots husband material.” Scott says then sighs. “But I’m not the one you wanna hear this from. You want Mickey to say these things.”

Ian doesn’t reply but the answer is pretty obvious. Mandy sends him a text asking for his help so he cuts lunch with Scott short. Their conversation won't leave his mind until he meets up with Mandy so he's grateful for the distraction.”

 

                                            **℅**

 

“You remember Scott from work, right? I've told you about him?” Ian asks Mickey one night when they're lying in his bed on a lazy Saturday afternoon.

“What about him?”

“But do you remember him?”

“Yeah, he's skinny with black hair, right?” Mickey asks pushing Ian off him gently so he can get off the bed and get his cigarettes that are in his jacket which is in his closet.

“He said that he would totally marry me if I just agreed to go on a date with him.”

Mickey freezes where he just opened the closet door. Turning around slowly, he looks at Ian who's biting on his bottom lip nervously. “What?”

Ian sits up and leans against the headboard. “Well, not now obviously. But if we dated and got there.”

Mickey walks back towards the bed forgetting about the cigarettes. “And you're considering it?”

“No!”

“So why bring it up with me?”

Ian shrugs. “Wanted your opinion.”

Mickey blinks at the redhead wondering what exactly to make of this. “I…I…” he stammers out. “No!”

“No?” Ian echoes.

“No.” Mickey repeats more adamantly. “You can’t settle. Ian Gallagher doesn’t fucking settle.”

Ian grins as Mickey crawls between his legs. “No?” he yelps loudly when Mickey grabs his thigh roughly and pulls him down so he's lying flat on the bed again.

“No.” Mickey says kissing his left thigh. “You are smart.” kiss on his stomach that makes Ian giggle. “Sweet.” Kiss on his chest. “So God damn beautiful. And a person with all those characteristics should never settle.” He nuzzles his neck in Ian's neck and the redhead goes off into another fit of giggles. “Okay?”

Ian nods before grabbing Mickey's cheeks. “Okay.” he sighs when Mickey slots their lips together.

Ian sighs happily and moans into Mickey's mouth. He doesn’t know if they're back together or not. All he knows is that he's really fucking happy.


	35. Chapter 35

 “What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“You don’ know shit Mandy, so shut the fuck up!”

“Like hell I don’ know shit. You think I'm stupid, that I haven’t figured it out, huh?”

“Figured what out?” Mickey asks sure that his sister has no clue what's going on.

Mandy scoffs, hands on her waist. “That you’ve been busy falling in love with Ian while becoming friends with him?”

“Mandy-“

“You think I don’t know that you love Ian but for some stupid fucking reason, you are afraid to tell him, Hmm?” Mandy breathes angrily. She blocks Mickey's way when he tries to side step her. “You can't keep putting Ian through this. You're my brother and I love you, but he's my best friend and I love him too. So you either tell him how you really feel, or let him the fuck go.”

“I can't do that.” Mickey shakes his head like the thought is unfathomable.

“Then tell him that you love him. You know he feels the same way.”

Mickey rubs a frustrated hand across his mouth. “Can't do that either.”

Mandy huffs. “Well tough shit.” She exhales and lets her anger sip away. “You're gonna need to do one of the two Mickey. Because right now you're just stringing him along. And that’s not fair.”

 

                                            **℅**

 

_Six Hours Ago_

 

Ian and Mandy are at the supermarket. The apartment has needed groceries for a while now but no one had the time. So first thing Sunday morning the two bestfriends head to the supermarket. They're laughing and talking and playing around with vegetables shaped like body parts. Ian is busy laughing at  Mandy waving around this huge egg plant when someone taps on his shoulder. He turns around and his laughter dies in his throat giving way to surprise.

“Oh my God, Earl!” he hugs his former friend tightly and Earl hugs him back. “How have you been?” Ian asks once they pull apart.

“I'm fine, thanks for asking. So good to see you again.” Earl says with a grin and Ian nods.

“Good to see you too. How is…” Ian tries to recall the name.

“Gale.” Earl finishes.

“Yes  Gale. You guys still going strong?”

“We’re still together, yes.” Earl replies with a small smile.

“What's wrong?” Ian asks concerned then he hears Mandy clear her throat behind him. “Oh my God I'm so sorry.” He grabs Mandy's hand pulling her forward. “This is Earl. We used to be classmates. Earl, this is Mandy, my best friend and…Mickey’s sister.”

“Nice to meet you Earl.” Mandy shakes his hand and takes the shopping cart. “Meet you outside.” She tells Ian with a smile.

“Are you almost done? Maybe we can grab coffee, or something?” Ian suggests.

“Coffee or something sounds great.”

.

Ian grabs his hot mug and takes a sip. “What's the problem?”

“Wow, diving right in, huh?” Earl jokes then laughs. His face then falls. “I just feel like he never puts me first when it comes to his family.”

Ian frowns. “What do you mean?”

“Like we’re fine any other time, but he always forgets when it comes to his family. If we had plans, he will cancel them the moment his mom calls, or his sister or his dog, I don’t even know man.”

Ian chuckles. “His dog?”

“I'm just…” Earl sighs. “It's exhausting that’s all.”

“What does he say when you argue about it?” Earl bites his bottom lip guiltily. “Earl.”

“I always say it's fine or he can go. I've never really,” he sighs. “I shouldn’t have to Ian.”

Ian smiles gently and looks at his friend. “You have to talk to him. I thought you were upset because he never listens to you but, if you’ve made him think it's okay then he's gonna keep doing it. You can't suffer in silence Earl. Tell him. Or you will end up resenting him. You love him, right?”

Earl nods. “I do.”

“And you're happy?”

“I am.”

Ian grabs Earl’s hand that’s on the table. “Then talk to him.”

Earl gazes at their touching palms for too long so Ian pulls his hand away. “What happened with Mickey?”

“Umm,” Ian sips his coffee. “After that fight you walked in on I started dating this other guy but,” he clears his throat. “It didn’t work out? So now I'm single.”

Earl tilts his head and raises a disbelieving eyebrow. “You're too happy to be single.”

Ian nods a blush tainting his cheeks. “Okay so Mickey and I…”

Earl gasps. “What if he cheats again?”

“We’re not together.”

Earl puts his coffee down and crosses his arms. “Then I'm confused.”

“It's complicated.”

“Yeah, I bet it is.” Earl says and Ian avoids his eyes. “It seems you and I aren’t getting what we need from the men we love.”

“Don’t.”

“No I'm serious.” Earl starts. “We’ve known each other for years, we’re the same character wise, we would never hurt each other-“

“Stop.” Ian interrupts. “All you gotta do is talk to Gale and things will be back to normal for you.”

“What about you?” Ian shakes his head and pushes his cup away, the coffee suddenly losing its appeal. “You and I could go right down to courthouse, get married and live happily ever after. We’re one in the same Ian. Bad boys just keep bringing us heartache.”

Ian stares at Earl. “Are you serious?”

Earl laughs and runs a hand through his hair. “No. I don’t know. Maybe just a little bit.”

“Earl-“

“You love Mickey, I love Gale, I know.”

Both men slump back in their seats silently, each lost in thought.

 

                                            **℅**

 

Mandy and Mickey are laughing at something on the TV when Ian gets home.

“Hey Ian, how did it go with Earl?” Mandy asks making Mickey pause the movie to glare at her.”What?”

“You told me he went to get fucking coffee with a friend.”

Mandy frowns at her brother confused. “He’s got a boyfriend Mick, stand down.” Ian says stepping out of his shoes and Mickey visibly relaxes. The talk with Earl had given Ian the confidence to comfront Mickey. He has suspected for a while now that Mickey loves him back, but for some reason he won't admit it. talking with Earl made him want to chance it. Mickey's actions all point towards the fact that he more than cares about Ian. He's finding out today one way or another. “Not that it matters.” He continues. “I mean I _am_ single after all, right Mick?”

Mickey gets up. “What are you doing?”

“I'm saying that today Earl was willing to give up his relationship for me. Give up Gale for me. I mean, I turned him down but now I can't seem to remember why I did that.”

“Ian,”

“No Mick, I'm serious. why do I keep saying no to these guys. You?” Ian scoffs, getting angry. “It's not like you're ever going to love me. I mean I'm good for a roll in the sack but that’s it, right?”

Mickey bites his bottom lip breathing heavily. “You can't be with Earl. If he's willing to leave Gerald for you,”

“Gale.”

“Whoever!” Mickey yells then takes a deep breath. “If he's willing to leave someone else for you, what's stopping him from leaving you for someone else?”

Ian steps up to Mickey so they're inches apart. “And that’s the _only_ reason you don’t want me and Earl together?”

Mandy stares and the two men that she loves unconditionally stand next to each other breathing heavily. This is Mickey's chance to tell Ian how he feels but she knows in her heart her idiot of a brother won't take it. Not unless she intervenes.

She gets up and walks round the sofa. “Ian, I need to talk to Mickey.”

“It's fine.” Ian sniffs. “I'm done anyway. I'm going to get my shit and I'm leaving. I'm done.” Ian starts heading towards Mickey's room but Mandy grabs his wrist.

“Ian, look at me.” He does. “She leads him towards the main door and opens it. “Trust me.”

“Mandy I can't do this anymore.”

“I know, which is why I need you to trust me.” She whispers. “Don’t leave. Just stand here and listen.”

“What do you mea-“

“Listen.” Mandy says before shutting the door.

Ian has no option but to lean against it his ear by the door. Mandy says to listen, Ian trusts her so that’s exactly what he’ll do.”  

 

                                            **℅**

 

_Now_

 

_“Well tough shit. You're gonna need to do one of the two Mickey. Because right now you're just stringing him along. And that’s not fair.”_

Ian was right. Mickey _does_ love him. This is what Mandy wants him to hear. Mickey won't tell Ian but maybe he will tell Mandy.  
Ian slides down the door and leans on it, ready for more. He _needs_ to know.

 


	36. Chapter 36

Mickey is scared. 

Mandy can tell. Of what, she's not sure. But he is, he really is. Mandy sighs heavily and leans on the couch crossing her arms. "What's your plan Mickey?" She asks. "You plan on coming between all the men he dates? Mick, do you plan on sabotaging all his potential dates?" Mickey chews on his bottom lip and stares at her. "That, is a terrible fucking plan, Mickey. All you gotta do is say you love him. That's it." 

"I can't." 

"Why?" Mandy asks, this time gently. 

"He will want us to be together." Mickey replies gently. 

Mandy looks at her brother confused. "What's wrong with that? Isn't that what you want?" 

"I do." 

"So!" 

Mickey groans and pulls at his hair. "I do! Alright? I do! I fucking..." Mickey takes a deep breath. "I do. There. I said it." 

"Mick-" 

"I hurt him so much last time. My cheating, tore him apart. I can't do that to him again. I am trying to save him from assholes like Damien but if I end up hurting him too, what's the difference between me and them?" 

"Oh Mick." Mandy looks at her brother and how torn up he is about this. She sniffs and tries not to cry. "Mickey." She repeats and pulls him into a hug. "Listen to me," she starts. "You know better. You're better now, and you love him." She pulls back her tears finally falling. Mandy shakes her head and grabs his cheeks. "Think about it Mickey, you're practically dating already." 

Mickey blinks at her in realization. She's right. But mickey has never been in love before and he panics at the thought of hurting Ian again. He's about to speak when said man walks back in. The redhead shuts the door quietly and looks around the room. He glances at the ceiling and sniffs his tears away. 

"Mandy?" He calls. 

Mandy nods and picks up her phone from the table. "I'll leave you two alone." 

Ian doesn't move until the door has closed behind her. After she's left he looks at Mickey who's now leaning on the back of the couch his right leg shaking. 

"Say it." Ian says softly. 

Mickey swallows. "What?" 

Ian nods and wipes at his cheeks with both palms so his face is dry. "I have wanted to hear you say it for so long." Ian exhales a shuddering breath. "You told Mandy that you do, but you didn't actually say it. I _need_ you to say it." 

He steps closer to Mickey and the brunette blinks up at him. “I don’t want to hurt you Ian.”

“I don’ care about that right now, I need to hear you say it.”

Mickey nods and swallows again. He looks Ian straight in the eye. “I love you.” Ian inhales sharply. His heart beat picks up and his lips go dry. “I love you Ian Gallagher, I love you so much I can't believe it sometimes.” Mickey continues, his confidence growing. He steps towards Ian and the moment he holds his freckled cheek Ian starts sobbing. “Don’t cry puppy, please. I love you.” Ian just cries harder.

He hugs Mickey close to him and kisses his neck leaving snort and tears in his wake. “You love me.”

Mickey hugs him tightly. “I really fucking do.”

“Do what?”

“Love you.” Mickey pulls back to peck Ian on the lips.

“Fuck.” Ian whispers still overcome by the emotion of having Mickey return the sentiment. “Fuck.” He starts pulling at Mickey's shirt and forcefully takes it off. He still can't stop the tears from falling but he doesn’t care. He just wants them connected. Now.

They're kissing.

They're touching.

Mickey is saying ‘I love you’ over and over’ knowing how much Ian needs to keep hearing it. They're on the floor, behind the couch completely naked.

They’ve had sex in the living room enough times for Mickey to hide some lube under the couch cushion. So within no time he's inside Ian and the latter is scratching his back and ass and pulling him closer so he sinks even deeper.

“Say it, say it Mick. Say it.” Ian begs desperately.

“I love you.” Mickey confesses with the next thrust. “I love you.” he repeats with the next one. “I love you.” he repeats it over and over and over every time he thrusts inside the man he loves.

And Ian moans louder every time. The sex feels better this time. More emotional. They're more connected than they've ever been. Ian feels like he belongs to Mickey now and he can’t be happier. “Fucking hell!” he cries out when Mickey pounds against his prostate. “Yes!” he is so fucking close. He will come any minute now and he only wants to hear one thing. “Say it!”

“I fucking love you, you fucking puppy!”

Mickey cries out driving both of them to their climaxes. Ian grabs onto him hard and doesn't let him go for a long time. They breathe there with Mickey peppering kisses on Ian in the places he can reach when the redhead has such a tight hold on him. Finally, Ian says, 

"You love me." Before letting him go. 

Mickey pulls out and drops next to Ian. He laughs as he stares at the ceiling. "I'm sorry I kept you waiting so long. It seems so stupid now." 

Ian takes his hand and slots their fingers together. "You love me." He sing songs making Mickey laugh. "Say it." 

"I love you Ian." Mickey leans on his elbow and kisses Ian. "I love you." 

Ian sighs and squeezes his hand while caressing Mickey's cheek with his free hand. "You're gonna hurt me." He starts making Mickey's face fall. "No, hear me out. You're gonna hurt me. Of course you're gonna hurt me, just like I'm gonna hurt you." Mickey smiles softly and kisses the palm touching him. "But that's how relationships work." 

"Yeah?" Mickey asks honestly curious. 

"Yes. As long as you don't cheat on me or hit me." Ian jokes but Mickey's face contorts into something resembling pain.

"I would never." Ian looks into the blue eyes earnestly. "I know I cheated on you once but, never again Ian. That I can promise you right here, right now." 

"So it's official?" Ian asks. 

"Yes." Mickey nods and kisses Ian again. Their tongues dangle for a few minutes and Ian inhales before pulling back. 

"So I'm not just your puppy but your boyfriend too?" 

Mickey laughs pulling Ian ontop of him. He spanks him once and grins up at him. "You're my puppy and my partner. We're way past boyfriends now." 

"I love you Mickey Milkovich." 

"I love _you_ Ian Gallagher." 

Ian shuts his eyes and laughs. "Aaaah... Say it again." 

"I love you." 

"Mmm." Ian hums satisfied and lies on Mickey's chest. It feels so good right now he can't even put it in words. "This is the best day of my life." 

Mickey kisses his forehead before sniffing the red hair. Ian looks up at him with a big smile on his face. Mickey chuckles. "What?" 

"Say it again." 

 


	37. Chapter 37

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S- if there's a fellow writer here who knows how to leave links in notes, let me know.

Ian laughs loud and free as they toss around the bed naked. Mandy had come back to find them naked in the living room floor and had angrily sent them to their room. Now here they were, rolling around in bed, bringing out their inner child. Ian feels like crying every time time Mickey shows how he can't take his hands off him. Every time the bad boy peppers kisses on a specific body part. He's clearly not afraid to let go anymore and it's driving Ian insane!

This is Mickey loving on him. This is Mickey finally letting lose and showing his affection for Ian. They've confessed their love for each other and now there's no holding back. Mickey is not afraid to say and show Ian how he feels. And now, the redhead is not afraid to speak his mind in fear of how Mickey might react. 

They're free. 

And it's the single most wonderful feeling in the world. To be free, _together_. Ian suggests a shower and Mickey chases him in there right before pulling him into his arms. Ian yelps and wraps his hands around Mickey's neck. 

"I'm so fucking happy." He whispers touching their foreheads together.

"I'm happier." 

"I doubt that." 

"Oh, fuck off." 

Ian snorts as they walk into the shower and mickey Mickey slowly let's his feet touch the floor. He opens the shower and cold water falls on them. Ian cries out trying to leave but Mickey won't let him. 

"Stop being a fucking pussy." 

"We gotta let it hit up." 

"It's already hitting up, c'mere." Mickey pulls him in for a kiss and Ian goes willingly, immediately parting his lips and welcoming the kiss that's always gonna make his knees go weak.

The kiss is filled with longing and hunger, every emotion Ian has bottled up for so long in fear of losing the other man. "I didn't think you'd ever love me." Ian confesses softly looking earnestly into the blue eyes.

Mickey kisses the sadness away and pulls him in close. "I'm never gonna let you forget that I do." Mickey promises, reaching behind Ian and working him open as the hot water falls down on them. 

Mickey kisses Ian and continues to finger him. He holds him gently like he's precious. Which he is. Ian gasps and his head tilts back. 

"Mickey." It's a broken whisper. God, he loves this man. "MICKEY!" He cries out louder when Mickey suddenly spins him and immediately breaches his entrance, made easier by the fact that he's been inside him twice already today. Ian's palms hold onto the glass before him as he continues to chant the man's name. The third time and the sex is still as sweet, still overwhelming. "Fuck." 

Mickey grabs onto Ian's slippery hips and just pummels into him. The slapping of their hips is louder, the slapping of his balls against Ian's ass louder, their moaning echoes in the space, it's the most beautiful thing Mickey has ever experienced and so much more. Ian is pushing his ass back, giving him the opportunity to go in that much deeper. "Fuck." The redhead drives him crazy. Everything with Ian is so fucking intense it scares Mickey sometimes. But he wouldn't have it any other way. 

Ian reaches behind him and grabs Mickey's neck to pull him in for a kiss. "Mmh." He groans into the shorter man's mouth because Mickey doesn't relent in his pounding even as they make out in the awkward position. 

"Fucking love you." Mickey pinches one of Ian's nipples and the redhead gasps, deserting the kiss. "I love you." Mickey repeats as he stills his movements, pressing the tip of his cock against Ian's prostate. He spanks Ian with one hand and continues to play with his nipples with the other. His dick is still against Ian's sweet spot and the redhead is going mad. 

He's cursing, confessing his love for Mickey and yelling all at the same time. Mickey doesn't move until Ian gives one final shout and cums loudly, shuddering intensely through his climax. 

Mickey pulls out and while Ian catches his breath, Mickey jerks himself off and it doesn't take long before he's pouring his seed on the bathroom floor. He watches as his sperm goes down the drain and feels long arms wrap around him, weakly. Ian plants a smooth kiss on his cheek. 

"Water's getting cold." Mickey hadn't realized. They walk out of the shower and Mickey grabs Ian's towel to dry off his boyfriend. Ian already used to Mickey doing this, just runs his hands through the wet black strands. "I wouldn't call that a shower. We have to go back in later." He jokes making Mickey laugh. He hangs Ian's towel back up and grabs his own. 

"No, let me." Ian takes it from him and returns the favor. "That was awesome by the way." 

"I wash and wipe you all the time." 

Ian clicks his tongue. "Not that. The sex." 

Mickey smirks as they head back towards the bed. "Was it? Couldn't tell from your loud howling. Probably gonna be getting a disturbance note from the neighbors any time now." 

Ian dives on the bed and hides under the covers. "Fuck off, alright?" Mickey laughs. "Fetch me food boyfriend. I'm hungry." 

"Oh, that's how it's gonna be now?" Mickey grins putting on his sweats. "You commanding me, because I finally confessed how I feel?" 

Ian puts both pillows under his head and smirks. He raises an eyebrow at Mickey, daring him to refuse.

Mickey shakes his head, feigning exhaustion. "Things i do for love." 

Ian laughs as Mickey plants a dry kiss on his cheek right before walking out of the room. He lays back on the bed, happier than he's ever been and stretches out. He grabs his phone from the stand and he can't believe it's just 9:00PM. The time is going nowhere. Well and good too, Ian never wants to leave Mickey's side. 

*****

*****

*****

*****

*****

Ian has nodded off when Mickey shakes his awake. "Hey." The brunette calls gently. His heart fills as he watches Ian find his bearings. A smile slowly forms on his adorable pink mouth. 

"You love me." 

Mickey shakes his head in amusement as he helps Ian sit up. He places one of the pillows on the redhead's lap and puts the plate of food on it. "Mandy made you something." He gives Ian a lingering kiss that he returns heartily. "And yes, I do." 

 Ian doesn't stop smiling until he's done. "That was good." 

"Mmm." Mickey hums as he places the empty plate on the floor next to the bed and settles them under the covers. He goes to spoon Ian but the redhead shakes his head and makes him turn around.

"My turn." 

"C'mon, really!" Mickey exclaims even as he does as told. 

"Yes." 

He settles against Ian's chest and caresses the arm around him. "Is this a new rule? Once we exchange 'I love yous' I become the little spoon?" He closes his eyes. Being in another man's hold is different. But because it's Ian he feels just as comfortable. 

*****

*****

*****

*****

*****

Mickey wakes up because Ian is shaking with silent laughter. "What the fuuuck?" He groans looking at the time. It's just 5:00AM. "Go back to sleep." He begs pulls Ian tighter against his chest. Ian won't stop laughing. "Okay, what?" 

Ian breathes as he calms down. "It's just that, I'm the little spoon, even though this is not how we slept." 

Mickey smiles. "Why is that funny again?" 

Ian laughs. "I don't know. It just is." 

Mickey just shakes his head and places a kiss on Ian's forehead. He caresses his back softly and they just lay there basking in each other's presence. Ian breaks the silence with a heavy confession that knocks the wind out of Mickey. 

 "I'm not sure why me." Ian starts extremely shy and soft. Mickey raises his eyebrows as he listens intently. "But I'm really glad you feel the same way I do." Mickey knows how insecure Ian is and how low his self esteem is. So even though he's terrible with words, he understands that this is the point where he comes up with reassuring words for Ian. But before he can say anything his boyfriend continues. "I mean, there's no reason for you to be stuck with me." Ian says. He's gently caressing Mickey's thigh and the insecurity slashes through Mickey's heart. The redhead sits up so he can steadily look at Mickey. 

Ian needs him to see this for what it is. An out. It's not too late. Ian would be destroyed if Mickey was to change his mind but the redhead needs him to know he can if he wants to. 

"I'm sure I'm annoying and I drive you crazy sometimes," Ian licks his lips as Mickey's heart breaks with every word leaving him. "and there's probably a lot of people out there who would be a better match for you." 

Mickey's heart clenches because he can hear that Ian really believes what he's saying. He wants to fix this, wants to boost his self esteem. Ian has always been shy and innocent, but sometimes with Mickey he's so confident that Mickey tends to forget just how fragile Ian really is. So he takes his boyfriend's hand and guides him on his lap. Just like the day all this started. 

"Ian," the younger man ducks his head and Mickey lifts his chin so they're looking into each other's eyes. "there's no one I'd rather be with than you." He tries to put as much weight on that statement as he can without shouting. "I love you. If anything, I'm the one that doesn't fucking deserve you. Or your love." Ian shakes his head but Mickey shooshes him. "You are incredible Ian. I am so happy that you talked me into this." Mickey points between them. "You taught me how to love, showed me that I can be loved, you are so special to me Ian, you don' even know." Ian smiles shyly and Mickey knows he's getting somewhere. "I would do anything for you. I would give you the _world_ if I could." He continues, tearing up at how heavy this conversation is. "And as for driving me crazy, fuck yeah you drive me crazy." He caresses Ian's cheek gently. "It's why I fell in love with you, why I can never stop thinking about your pale ass. So don't you ever, doubt my love for you ever again. Don't ever demean yourself in my presence, because you are _everything_ to me. You hear me?" Ian nods tears falling down his face. 

"Wow." Ian wipes them off and sniffs loudly. "Who needs Shakespeare when you got Mickey Milkovich." 

"Fuck off." Mickey snaps pushing him off, a little offended that Ian is joking after he just beared himself raw like that. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Ian apologizes as he gets back on Mickey's lap. "I'm sorry." He kisses the brunette and exhales in relief when the gesture gets returned. "Thank you for loving me." 

"Thank you for loving me too." 

Mickey grabs Ian's waist and drops him on his back gently and straddles him. He kisses Ian's brow, then nose, then lips. And Ian just _beams_ at him because he's so incredibly happy, he doesn't know what to say. They make out for what seems like hours till their lips are red and swollen. And this time when Ian rides Mickey into the mattress, it's slow, fingers entwined as they stare into each other's eyes and make none-verbal promises to each other, that only they understand.  

*****

*****

*****

*****

*****

 When Ian and Mickey shower and finally resurface, Mandy has set breakfast in the balcony. The moment they step out to join her Ian stares at the table in shock. 

"This is everything we bought yesterday, we are never going to finish this." He takes a seat opposite Mandy and Mickey takes a seat next to him. He looks at all the food in display and doesn't know where to start. 

"Well," Mandy explains. "You guys are officially together and in love. Figured it deserved some kind of..."she waves around all the food. "something." 

"So that means cooking everything in the fucking house?" Mickey asks her as he chews on a piece of bacon before taking Ian's hand under the table and placing their joint hands on his thigh. 

"Shut up, what are you complaining about? You have the money." 

"Not the fucking point." 

"Oh yeah? What _is_ the point?" 

"Not to waste fucking food?" 

"We have one of those things called a fridge Mickey, ever heard of those? They ensure that leftovers don't spoil." 

Mickey throws his oily middle finger at her. "Oh, fuck off." 

As the two siblings bicker Ian just blushes happily. Mickey would rather eat with his left hand just so he can hold Ian's. This is fucking serile. He can't stop grinning and his jaw is starting to ache but he doesn't give a shit. He loves Mickey, Mickey loves him, so everything else can suck it. 

*****

*****

*****

*****

*****

The three of them eat in the balcony talking and laughing. Mickey quietly watches his redhead, his puppy with a fond smile. Ian laughs at something Mandy says. His laughter is as bright as the morning sun. And Mickey regrets having taken so long to tell Ian how he feels, because this could have been every day. But he supposes it's not too late. 

He plans on making Ian the happiest man on earth. He plans on making up for the time he made Ian doubt or hurt because he couldn't tell him how he felt. 

Ian plants a soft kiss on his cheek. "Love you." 

Mickey kisses him on his lips making Mandy click her tongue. Mickey flips her off and he deepens the kiss with Ian just to spite her. "Love you too."  

He's got alot to make up for. But right now, he's going to eat breakfast with his boyfriend and his sister. He's going to hold Ian's hand for the rest of the morning, for as long as he can. And if he would, he would never let go.

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_ENDX_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *yawns and stretches out* 
> 
> Oh man. Here we are.  
> The End.  
> Can't believe this was supposed to be 3 chapters. What the fuck?! Anyhu,  
> Special thanks to @Caltyn and @Missannamurphy for promoting me this.  
> Bless u Ela for the idea u gave me so I was able to continue this. 
> 
> Thanks guys for all your support and all your kudos, and comments and bookmarks. You have made writing this story so much fun ＼(^o^)／ due to all the support. Ugh! You've been incredible. Just incredibe. 
> 
> I would like to thank my beta,  
> Nah, just kidding. I proof read myself so all mistakes are mine. Tihihihihihi
> 
> Okay then. If you're a fan of my writing, see u on _Inseparable_ and the rest that's on the way ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°  
>  Catch you on tumblr, same name, twitter Luckyshaz2015  
> Facebook group **LET'S BE SHAMELESS...SHAMELESSLY**  
>  Instagram... I don have one!
> 
> Mob love, Shazy out!! ❤❤❤❤♥♥♡♡♡♥♡♥♡
> 
> ( ͡ʘ ͜ʖ ͡ʘ) <\- (thats so creepy)


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